I can't believe that came from your mouth!
Archive for May, 2010
Look What’s On Chat Roulette
May 31st
Neither one of them had much to do this Memorial Day weekend.
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Loading ...Pakistani Protests are a Sausage Fest!
May 30th
Look at the angry Pakis. Watch them rage. Watch them stomp. Stomp, Paki, Stomp. Rage, rage, rage. Below are some hilarious photos of PO’d Pakis angry because bloggers like me exercised our freedom of speech and participated in the first annual Everyone Draw Muhammad Day.
Notice how they exclude chicks from their public protests? I can’t take any protest seriously unless they are more inclusive. Where are the women? The blacks? The gays? Oh yeah, they killed all the gays.
The photos were taken from a hilarious story here about how some lame Pakistani developer made a crappy ripoff of Facebook after the Pakistani gov’t banned and blocked Facebook at its national filters. What should they call an Islamic version of Facebook? Burkabook?
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Email and Bacon
May 30th
Two of my favorite things come in this car at the flip of a simple switch.
Thanks to Miss Cellania!
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(1 votes, average: 6.00 out of 6) Loading ...God Bless the Bikers
May 30th
Perhaps its fitting that Dennis Hopper passed this Memorial Day Weekend- he made the movie and phrase Easy Rider synonymous with American freedom. Every Memorial day my neighborhoods and neighborhood pubs and restaurants fill up with out of town bikers- some from the west coast- who come every year to pay their respects to the fallen war dead by driving to the Memorials in downtown DC.
I think the annual bikers rally was originally to bring attention to the still missing POW/MIA soldiers, but I think it has grown to simply honor all fallen soldiers.
And today was the perfect day to ride. Thanks to Michelle Malkin for the video.
A few years ago I attended the ride of the Patriots. It is the Fairfax chapter that sets out from Patriot Harley Davidson in Fairfax to take part in the annual ride. See that post here.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Cartney Roasting Marshmallows
May 30th
Lazy night with friends. Cartney got to toast his first marshmallows over a fire. He wasn’t much a fan of eating them, but like all boys the best thing in the world is a FLAMING STICK!!
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(1 votes, average: 6.00 out of 6) Loading ...Dennis Hopper Eaten by a Giant Bird
May 29th
I was out at dinner and my lovely wife mentioned to me that “Hopper died.”
“I know,” I said. “He got eaten by a big bird at the end of Bug’s Life.”
She put down her iPhone and glared me. “No Dennis Hopper. He had the ass cancer.”
“A giant bird would have been better.”
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(1 votes, average: 6.00 out of 6) Loading ...Little Drummer Boy
May 29th
Cartney loves to bang on Poppa’s drumset. He has the foot pedal action going on the bass drum and everything.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Gary Coleman Gets Half-Off at Funeral Home
May 28th
I’ll keep this short. The half-pint star of Diff’rent Strokes died from intracranial bleeding today. Its apparently the same disease that he has been suffering from for quite some time. Hmm. Intracranial bleeding is just a “diff’rent stroke” after all, right?
The little dude at least gets a discount on his casket since its kid-sized as well as a discount for his funeral plot since he doesn’t need the full size. He may be able to share it with several other notable midgets, as they stack pretty well in tight spaces. There is even room left over for Verne Troyer.
I know you guys think I’m awful and may even be shouting, “Pat that’s a low blow!”
I know, life is too short. Gary Coleman knew this. But was never able to rise above his low expectations. He was 4’2″. Uh, make that 42.
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(1 votes, average: 6.00 out of 6) Loading ...I Finally Understand the Twilight Phenomena
May 28th
It took this video and some stick figures to ‘splain it to me.
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(1 votes, average: 6.00 out of 6) Loading ...Venus Has Something to Prove
May 28th
I think she is trying to prove she’s not the ugly one of the two Williams sisters. She does this, according to the Onion, by wearing only the outfits Daddy picks for her.
As comparison, here is Serena and Venus in more modest clothes. Yep, Serena is cuter.
Know what would have made the lengerie tennis outfit hotter? How about some awesome fake nipplage?
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(1 votes, average: 6.00 out of 6) Loading ...Welcome to the Internets. Here’s Your Tissues
May 28th
An 89 year old man needed to find a clue to help him solve his crossword puzzle. What is six letters for “Asian Wild Ass?” He used Yahoo to search for Asian wild Ass and was stunned at what he found.
From the Sun here:
A CROSSWORD fan aged 89 used an internet search to solve a clue about a donkey – and was bombarded with hard-core porn.
The great-grandad typed “asian ass” into Yahoo’s search engine in the hope of finding the answer to the newspaper poser.
But he was stunned when it threw up dozens of porn sites displaying photos of naked Asian girls. One offered “the hottest spicy asian ass you’ll ever see”.
Ex-engineer Jack said: “I was shaken. The images were horrendous. I didn’t know this sort of stuff existed.”
It was “onager” – sometimes known as “Wild Ass Asian” and found in deserts from the Mid East to Tibet.
He was doubly stunned to find that they aren’t actually sideways.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Gov. Chris Christie Confronts Bitchy Rich Teacher
May 27th
Rita Wilson gets a raise every year and gets summers off and will get almost a million dollars in pension benefits when she retires. She makes 86,000 dollars per year. She was asked to go one year without a raise and to actually contribute a tiny portion of her salary to buy her medical and retirement benefits. Watch this bitch wag her finger at her own Governor.
Notice how she is pissed about a pay freeze with one breath and then shakes her finger in the next saying she only teaches because she “loves the children.” Hey Rita, go ahead and quit. I don’t think you will find a job with your salary and your non-existent skillset in the private sector.
Thanks to HotAir for posting a video I had been searching for all day.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Meanwhile, On the Couch
May 27th
I have no idea what is going on with American Idol, but I reckon it must be over and this Mom’s entire trailer dwellin’ life is now ruined because of Ryan Seacrest and his bogus results.
Hilarious comment over at VideoGum says: “Yeah, mom is pretty emotional, but ever since dad developed that crippling shirt allergy, American Idol is pretty much all she has to live for.”
And just how did Danny McBride get on that couch?
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(1 votes, average: 6.00 out of 6) Loading ...Sandra Bullock Picks Huge Winners
May 27th
Sandra Bullock is proven to make horrible decisions. Speed 2. Demolition Man. The Net. Adopting a Black Baby. And she married this gigantic lactating crapweasel.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Iron Baby Versus Bunnies
May 27th
This is pretty awesome. But I’m guessing a key ingredient in his repulsor rays is the load he carries in his iron diaper.
Thanks to GAS
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Top Kill: MMS Chief Fired
May 27th
The unattractive fat chick who was the head of the Minerals Management Service resigned before her idol Barack Hussein Obama had the chance to fire her wide-ass. Now America can blame the Gulf oil spill on her.
From Sweetness and Light here:
The head of the troubled agency that oversees offshore drilling resigned under pressure Thursday, Democratic sources said, as President Barack Obama moved more aggressively to take charge of the Gulf oil spill.
The departure of Minerals Management Service Director Elizabeth Birnbaum came just hours before Obama’s planned White House press conference on the oil spill, where he was expected to extend a moratorium on new deepwater oil drilling…
Birnbaum was out after she and her agency came under withering criticism from lawmakers of both parties over lax oversight of drilling and cozy ties with industry.
But crazier still, S. Elizabeth Birnbaum is a Harvard-educated lawyer. How on earth could she not be up to any job?
Know how you know this broad is a Democrat? She’s fat, dour, and refuses to wear makeup in public. I guess she’s home this afternoon scraping that “Hope and Change” sticker off the back of her Prius.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Hudson Hornet in Incredibles
May 27th
A little nugget of an Easter Egg is hidden in the fight scene between the Supers and the giant robot at the end of the Incredibles Pixar movie. In the lower left hand corner of this shot is a blue Hudson Hornet, which was Doc Hudson in the Cars movie.
My kid stares at the screen during the fight scene in hopes of spotting “Doc” and if he misses it, he makes Mommy or me rewind it so he can see it.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...James O’Keefe Cops the Plea
May 26th
ACORN foe James O’Keefe copped a plea and pleaded guilty to entering a federal building under false pretenses.
From Breitbart here:
Four conservative activists accused of trying to tamper with the phones in Sen. Mary Landrieu’s office have pleaded guilty to misdemeanor charges of entering federal property under false pretenses.
The most prominent activist, James O’Keefe, was sentenced to three years probation, 100 hours of community service and fined a $1,500 fine. The 25-year-old is known for wearing a pimp costume in a video that embarrassed ACORN.
Magistrate Daniel Knowles III sentenced the three others to two years probation, 75 hours of community service and fined them $1,500.
Eeryone on the left is cheering that James O’Keefe is a convicted person now. Well, its only a misdemeanor and everyone in Code Pink are convicted of felonies and no one seems to care about that.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...This is Why You Just Kill Pirates
May 26th
Stupid Dutch. Instead of sending the Pirates to Davy Jones’ Locker where they mythically and literally belong, they brought them to trial. Now 16 months after capture they go before a judge and say, “We weren’t pirates. We use those rocket launchers to go fishing for sharks! Arrr Matey!”
From the Telegraph here:
Five Somali men have protested that they were shark fisherman not pirates despite being intercepted off Somalia’s coast after attacking a Dutch vessel with rocket launchers and assault rifles.
Europe’s first modern trial for the 17th century crime of “sea robbery” has opened in Rotterdam amid protestations of innocence from the accused.
The men, facing jail terms of nine to 12 years, are accused of attacking and attempting to hijack the Samanyolu, a Dutch Antilles-flagged ship, while it was sailing in the Gulf of Aden in January 2009.
Farah Ahmed Yusuf, 25, accused the cargo ship of attacking the Somalis after engine failure had forced them to abandon their shark fishing expedition and seek help.
“The intention was to fish,” he said.
“As we came closer, we put our hands in the air. While we had our hands in the air, they shot at us. They attacked us.”
Seems like a pretty light sentence for something like this too. European justice is way too nice.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...I’m Getting the Shaved Bieber App
May 26th
Tired of seeing all of those internet mentions of Justin Bieber? I don’t even know who the little twat is, but my intertubes get all clogged with mentions of the kid. Now Firefox has a plugin that will black out all of the mentions, comments and photos of Justin Bieber. All I can say is it’s about time!
Justin Bieber Shaving from Greg Leuch on Vimeo.
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