Latest Posts

Hippies Ruin the Gingerbread Man

Stupid vegan hippie doofuses have to ruin everything. Gender-neutral gingerfolk because rape culture. Is it gluten free? I’m surprised they are actually charging money for them, the greedy capitalists! A gluten-free, gender-less Gingerbread figure. #Best2014HalloweenCostumes...

MBIA Breach and Hard Headed Security

I’ve done numerous notifications to companies that have suffered breaches and exploits of customer data. Incidents have varied wildly- from law firms hosting malware to women’s health clinics that had a vulnerable online payment...

Walken Reads Wild Things

When I was a kid and went to the dentist, I don’t know what terrified me more- the Dentist or the creepiest kids book ever, Where the Wild Things Are. The story never made any sense and the artwork terrified 7 YO me. Christopher Walken reads this story the way only he can.

RFK Jr Displays Carbon Footprint Hiprocrisy

Who knew that RFK Jr. was still alive?  Not me.  Thought he’d have OD’d on drugs, hit a tree skiing or tried to turn a lightweight aircraft into a submarine by now.  Oh well, learn something new everyday, I suppose.  Anyways, he’s a huge Eco-Religionist, but when confronted about reducing his massive carbon footprint, he blows the environ-whacko code by revealing that voting for the right people is way more important than changing your lightbulbs.

This undead Kennedy sounds like he’s been smoking some killer reefer for 20 years but has forgotten how to exhale.

Florida Herons are Badasses

If you’ve ever wondered what happened to the dinosaurs, this settles the question.  This Heron stalks, kills and eats a gopher whole.  I’ve seen white herons in the neighborhood here eat four-foot snakes.  They whip them on the ground breaking the snake’s neck, and then its down the hatch.