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September 2, 2010

Search Results Archives: June 2007

June 30, 2007

Pusser’s PainKiller

by Pat — Categories: Belch.Com, DistractionsNo Comments

Ah, its summertime! While I am letting my charcoal heat up, I’m enjoying the perfect Pusser’s Painkiller.

To make yours, get a glass of ice. In it pour:

  • 2 oz of Genuine Pusser’s Rum
  • 4 oz of Pineapple Juice
  • 1 oz of Creme of Coconut
  • 1 oz of Orange Juice

Now shake it or stir it to make sure the thick creamy coconut milk is mixed thoroughly. Finally, sprinkle some grated or ground nutmeg on top. Enjoy!

This drink has some sentimental value to me because it is what my wedding party drank during our bachelor/bachelorette party the week before our wedding. Also, it’s Admiral Nelson’s Blood!

Alligators in My Neighborhood

by Pat — Categories: Bizarre, VirginiaNo Comments

In Northern Virginia, there are lots of creeks and streams that feed the Potomac River.  There are a few lakes too, but most of them are man-made.  And all of it is fresh water.  Which might make a good environment for an alligator if it was put there by a local yokel.

 

From the AP here:

RESTON, Va. – She had seen it on TV plenty of times, so for Erin Kemp, wrangling a stray alligator that wandered into her yard was no big deal.
 
She spotted the 2 1/2-foot-long gator Monday night in her suburban Washington neighborhood while taking out the garbage. Kemp told a 9-year-old neighbor to get away. She then grabbed a pen she uses to corral her kids’ guinea pigs and attempted to capture the animal.

At first the gator dashed away, but Kemp didn’t give up. She picked up the guinea pig pen again and threw it over the gator.

Three animal control officers finally arrived and took the gator away. They have not determined where the animal came from. It’s unusual — but not unheard of — to find an alligator in the suburbs, staffers at the Fairfax County animal shelter said.

For the suburbs, my town is full of wildlife.  But gators is a new one for me.

June 29, 2007

If I Were A Simpsons Character

by Pat — Categories: Belch.ComNo Comments

There is a great avatar creator at the Simpsons Movie website here.  This is what I would probably look like in Matt Groening’s world.

 

You can also see what I’d look like as an M&M or a SouthPark character.

Reason 144 To Homeschool- Teachers Won’t Get Your Kid High

by Pat — Categories: Crime, Stupid People, Why Homeschool?No Comments

A woman masquerading as a teacher was supposed to be tutoring a student in Math.  I think the lessons went something like this-  “If I have three joints and we smoke one, how many joints do we have left?” 

 

A mom picked up her 14-year-old from his teacher’s house and smelled pot on him and called the cops.

From the AP here:

A Goleta Valley Junior High School teacher is facing charges for allegedly smoking marijuana with two students.

Melissa Dunning, 31, was charged Wednesday with two counts of contributing to the delinquency of a minor and one count of furnishing marijuana. She faces arraignment July 3.

The parents of a 14-year-old student at the school told sheriff’s deputies on May 31 that they suspected their son and the teacher had been smoking pot, Sgt. Erik Raney said. Dunning had tutored the boy at her home.  Investigators said Dunning smoked pot with the teen on three occasions.

This stupid woman’s teacher’s page at the junior high school is here.  It lists her email address, so feel free to drop her a note.  I’m sure this teacher wanted to be “cool” in the eyes of her students.  When will teachers learn that their job does not involve being cool, but educating children?

Trouble Brewing

by Pat — Categories: CrimeNo Comments

In Florida, there is an apartment complex that “caters” to sex offenders.  Right next door is a church that is going to install a daycare center.  I’m wondering if the kids would be safer next to a dingo farm?

 

From Tampabays10.com

Pastor Earl Smith is excited about plans to remodel a building on the property of John Calvin Presbyterian Church. The church is going to run a daycare center and pre-school there and it’s a facility Smith says the neighborhood desperately needs.

But right next door is an apartment complex that caters to sex offenders.

State law says that sex offenders can’t live within 1,000 feet of a school or daycare center, but attorneys disagree what will happen in this situation. Once the daycare center opens the church believes the sex offenders must leave, but the apartment owner says sex offenders already living there will be grandfathered in.

How does an apartment complex “cater” to sex offenders, and more importantly, why?  And if you are a regular, non-kid-touching Joe, do you get a big discount on your rent if you want to move into the “Creepy Arms Apartments?” 

And I’m certain that the sex offenders will be forced to move.  State governments in the South almost always side with churches.

Muslims Botch Attack on London Nightspot

by Pat — Categories: RoPNo Comments

Muslim jihadis attempted to detonate a car bomb outside of a popular Picadilly nightclub, Tiger Tiger.  But the bomber botched the attack and fled on foot.  This one could have killed dozens if not more than a hundred.

 

From sky.com here:

The car bomb found in London’s West End contained 60 litres of petrol, a large amount of nails and several gas canisters, police have revealed.  Detectives believe they have foiled a major terror attack after the “big” explosive device was discovered in a Mercedes early this morning.  They said if the bomb had gone off it could have caused “significant injury or loss of life”.
 
Bomb squad officers defused it after police received reports of a suspicious vehicle close to the Tiger Tiger nightclub in Piccadilly shortly before 2am.

An eyewitness said a man had crashed the vehicle into bins near Tiger Tiger and then ran off, before the alarm was raised.

The massive quantity of petrol along with several propane gas cylinders could have combined to create a massive explosion. There was so much petrol in the vehicle that the highly flammable vapour it gave off is believed to have looked like smoke.

(Scotland Yard) said it was too early to speculate about who was involved, and called on the public to remain vigilant.

Don’t know who was behind it eh?  It was the worshippers of Mo, stupid. 

June 28, 2007

New Arctic Monkeys

by Pat — Categories: Clowns, Music1 Comment

I got my new Arctic Monkeys CD, Favourite Worst Nightmare, from Amazon.com today. You can get yours too by clicking the photo below.

And check out their hit single, Fluorescent Adolescent below. Warning! There are clowns in the video triumphing over common men, so its quite disturbing.

Hope For Part-Time British Whores

by Pat — Categories: Bizarre, PoliticsNo Comments

If you are a British woman who sleeps around for crack, money, fancy cars, fame, fish and chips or whatever other reason, there is help on the way, courtesy of the Parlaiment.  Prostitution may be legalized, so long as you trollops are only humping guys part time.

 

From Reuters here:

Britain is proposing to remove the term “prostitute” from the criminal statutes because it carries too much stigma.
 
Instead, a new bill that the Justice Ministry has drafted refers simply to persons who sell sex persistently — defined as twice or more in three months.

“We just wanted to remove the stigma of the label ‘common prostitute’,” said a spokeswoman for the Justice Ministry.  “It’s been around since 1824, so it was a bit outdated. It just wasn’t really helpful to label people.”

The new bill introduces measures to try to get sex workers out of the industry, and in effect decriminalizes prostitution for those who are not considered persistent.

Who knew that being a whore carried a stigma in the eyes of society?  But not all whores are scummy tramps.  You should read my post on Mary Carleton.

Obligatory Paris Hilton Post

by Pat — Categories: Stupid PeopleNo Comments

Paris was a jailbird; now she’s not.  I didn’t really care.  She was what is affectionately called a “skank” or a “skeve” for all of her wanton partying and disregard for the law, business, and personal conduct.

 
Who is this cute girl??

But wait, what’s this?  Paris without caked-on makeup?  Nice bright smile?  Sensible jacket and top?  Nice braided pony tail?  Wow, this girl is actually cute when she’s not pissing everyone off!  And her interview with Larry King in which she promises to be a good girl from now on?  Of course that should be taken with a grain of salt, but are we looking at a new Paris Hilton?  Only time will tell.

But I think this settles it already in my mind and probably the mind of many others.  A few weeks in jail beats two months in rehab.  If Paris’ likeability goes up now, look for Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan to try to get themselves a nice jail sentence now.

Oh No, Car Accident!

by Pat — Categories: HumorNo Comments

My friend sent this email:

I rear ended a car this morning…
I tell you, it is going to be a REALLY bad day!
The driver got out of the other car, and he was a DWARF!!
He looked up at me and said “I am NOT Happy!”
So I said, “Well, which one ARE you then?”
That’s how the fight started.  I guess he was a little Grumpy.

Okay, I laughed out loud, and its probably an old joke.

June 27, 2007

One Third Teens Too Dumb to Avoid Cyber Bullies

by Pat — Categories: Cyber, MySpaceNo Comments

The Pew Internet center just conducted a cyber bullying poll and found out that a third of teens claim that they have been victimized by cyber-bullies.  Such victimization usually entails having personal or embarrassing IM’s or emails published.  To which I have to say…

 

From CNET here:

One in three teenagers say they’ve been bullied in some way online, but two-thirds of teens still believe they’re more likely to be harassed offline, according to a new study.

The most common form of bullying reported by teens online involves another person publicizing a private e-mail, instant message or text message, according to a study released Wednesday from the Pew Internet & American Life Project. Fifteen percent of teens surveyed said that they had experienced the embarrassment of having a private communication posted publicly online or forwarded to a third party.

Other types of harassment include someone spreading a rumor or posting an embarrassing photo on the Web, as well as someone sending a threatening or aggressive e-mail, IM or text message, the report found.

The study casts light on so-called cyberbullying, behavior among teens that child safety advocates believe could be more harmful than the threat of online sexual predators because of its sheer scope. A 2006 teen survey on cyberbullying reported that it affects as many as 13 million teens annually.

So some advocates are saying that spreading a rumor is more harmful than sexual assault?  WTF??!!  That is very far from the truth and this is just a veiled attempt to limit online speech.  While I know that cyber-bullying is a problem, it does not even compare to the breach of trust and real pain associated with sexual predatory behavior.

And cyber-bullying can be so easily avoided if you follow these simple rules-

  • Dont send anything online that you would not like to be published to the world.  This includes IM’s, emails and text messages.
  • Don’t allow yourself to be in a position where compromising or embarrassing photos could be taken of you.
  • Maintain a space online if you can that you alone can control, such as a private domain or web site.  Somewhere you can freely post your own ideas and refute any rumors about you.
  • Be honest and genuine with people in real life and limit your online interactions.  Those that know you will understand that rumors are just that, and nothing more.

Horrors of Socialized Healthcare

by Pat — Categories: BabyBelch, Politics, VirginiaNo Comments

Having just gone through a major medical procedure with the birth of my child, I can attest that things go wrong.  Some mistakes were made, but the baby and my wife came out just fine.  The billing process was pretty much transparent, and the hospital staff were courteous, professional and helpful.  Its what you can expect from the best that Western Medicine can offer.

Under socialized medicine, however, you can expect the following, as reported by Reuters here:

Heavily pregnant Karolina Mrowiec went to a Polish hospital in an advanced stage of labor and was surprised when the nurse asked her what was wrong.
 
“I am having a baby. Isn’t it obvious?” she replied.

Her story shows how an overstretched hospital system is struggling as Poland experiences its first baby boom in years.

The government is campaigning to encourage families to have more children, but as children born in a 1980s boom reach fertility, they are straining a system which constitutionally must provide free services to all Poles.

Healthcare has been slow to reform since the end of communism in 1989, and the hospitals’ grim state is adding to the difficulties of giving birth.

If you have insurance in this country, you can get some great medical care.  No long lines.  Doctors, not bureaucrats.  Beware of those that want to introduce socialized medicine in this country.  Rather, there should be a push for everyone to become insured.  In Virginia, you are not allowed to drive a car on the street if its not insured.  If you can’t afford insurance, you have to pay the state minimum.  The same should go for healthcare.

Nice Global Warming Ya Got There

by Pat — Categories: Eco-Religion1 Comment

Despite Al Gore’s repeated shrieks of alarm, there is mounting evidence that Global Warming just ain’t happening.  First up is the huge snowstorm in South Africa. 

 

From Reuters here:

A rare winter snowstorm dusted South Africa’s commercial capital Johannesburg early on Wednesday as a winter weather front moved across the country, closing mountain passes and claiming at least one life.
 
“SNOWBURG” trumpeted the headline of Johannesburg’s Star newspaper.

Gleeful children built snowmen in Johannesburg’s Zoo Lake Park, while families could be seen carrying snowballs back to their cars, fast melting souvenirs of the city’s first significant snowfall since 1981.

And those ice sheets in Antarctica that should be melting to doom us all?  Its not happening either.  From the AP here:

An ice sheet in Antarctica that is the world’s largest — with enough water to raise global sea levels by 200 feet — is relatively stable and poses no immediate threat, according to new research.

The air over the East Antarctic ice sheet, an ice mass more than 1,875 miles across and up to 2.5 miles thick centered on the South Pole, will remain cold enough to prevent significant melting in the near future, the New Zealand-led research shows.

This research team should be careful.  If the ice sheets aren’t melting then they won’t be getting any research grants.

June 26, 2007

Former Marine Pummels Pickpocket

by Pat — Categories: Crime, HumorNo Comments

Don’t mess with former Marines.  Especially those that were Golden Gloves competitors.  One pickpocket crackhead found this out the hard way when he was crushed into a bloody heap at a convenience store.

 

From the AP here:

Bill Barnes says he was scratching off a losing $2 lottery ticket inside a gas station when he felt a hand slip into his front-left pants pocket, where he had $300 in cash.
 
He immediately grabbed the person’s wrist with his left hand and started throwing punches with his right, landing six or seven blows before a store manager intervened.

Barnes served in the Marines, was an accomplished Golden Gloves boxer and retired after 20 years as an iron worker.  Barnes was a regional runner-up in Golden Gloves competition in the novice and open divisions before enlisting in the Marines in 1956.

There was blood everywhere,” said another manager on duty, Abby Ostrom, 25.

So They Make Neanderthal DNA

by Pat — Categories: Bizarre, RoPNo Comments

Researchers are getting close to reassembling the DNA of the Neanderthal Man.  They say its mostly to answer the question about what happened to the big hairy guys who once roamed Europe.  Did they interbreed with modern man?  Or just go extinct?  I think we should use a Neanderthal’s cave exploring expertise to locate Bin Laden, but there are fears that the smaller brain would make him ideal to be brainwashed into joining Islam.

 

From AP here:

Researchers studying Neanderthal DNA say it should be possible to construct a complete genome of the ancient hominid despite the degradation of the DNA over time.

Debate has raged for years about whether there is any relationship between Neanderthals and modern humans. Some researchers believe that Neanderthals were simply replaced by early modern humans, while others argue the two groups may have interbred.

Sequencing the genome of Neanderthals, who lived in Europe until about 30,000 years ago, could shed some light on that question.

I wonder if the Geico caveman approves? 

Kooky Cultures Won’t Last

by Pat — Categories: Bizarre, RoP, Stupid PeopleNo Comments

Cultures that have witch doctors and spiritual healers will soon disappear from this planet.  And that’s a GOOD thing.  A region’s culture should not be preserved like some kind of museum artifact just so future generations can look at it and giggle at how stupid their belief systems are.  But there are many folks who get teary-eyed when they learn that an aboriginal group of hunter-gatherers in a rain forest somewhere discover clothing and electricity.

 

One such kooky culture is the one that is in northern Malaysia.  They believe that witch doctors bury space aliens in their local cemetary.  From the AP here:

Malaysians in a northern village were alarmed by rumors that space aliens had been laid to rest in their neighborhood cemetery, but authorities learned the graves had merely been filled with banana tree trunks for a superstitious ritual, police said Tuesday.

Residents feared a local witch doctor had instructed grave diggers to bury extraterrestrials in the rural district of Pasir Mas on Sunday, causing police to detain the man for investigation.

The man was freed after he explained that banana tree trunks, not aliens, had been buried in a ceremony for “medicinal purposes.”

Witch doctors and spiritual healers are common in rural parts of Malaysia where superstitious beliefs have long been entrenched.

Yeah, they may be somewhat common, but just wait-  the Religion of Peace will wipe them out soon.  Malaysia is the most populous Islamic country, and we all know how tolerant they are of non-islamic beliefs.

Benoit Taps Out of Life

by Pat — Categories: Crime, Distractions1 Comment

And he does the Crippler Crossface to his wife and 7-year-old son, taking them out too.  What a lowlife, ‘roid ragin’ piece of crap.

 

From the AP here:

WWE wrestler Chris Benoit, his wife and son were found dead Monday, and police said they were investigating the deaths as a murder-suicide.
 
Investigators believe the 40-year-old Benoit killed his wife, Nancy, and 7-year-old son, Daniel, over the weekend, then himself on Monday. The bodies were found in three rooms.

World Wrestling Entertainment said on its Web site that it asked authorities to check on Benoit and his family after being alerted by friends who received “several curious text messages sent by Benoit early Sunday morning.”

It bothers me that WWE would pay such a tribute to this man if he was a cold-blooded murderer of his family.  Eddie Guerrero?  Sure.  Owen Hart?  You bet.  But when a wrestler snaps and offs his whole family, why have a whole show dedicated to his memory?

And you can bet there will be investigations into illegal substance abuse now in the WWE.  You can’t get bodies that look like comic book superheroes without taking some serious steroids.  And WWE is a publically traded company too.  This scandal, if it turns out to be steroid abuse as I suspect, may impact stock prices.

June 25, 2007

Racist Tatooed Freak Kills Guard

by Pat — Categories: Crime, Stupid PeopleNo Comments

I wrote about this freak before on this blog here.  He told his prison warden that he was injured and needed medical service.  He took advantage of a trip to the hospital to kill his 60 year old guard, then led police on a chase before being caught at an Arby’s.

 

From the AP here:

Curtis Allgier, whose wears a swastika and the words “skin head” on his heavily tattooed face, fired a shot in the Arby’s that hit no one before a customer at the restaurant snatched the gun, Salt Lake City police Sgt. Rich Brede said.

Allgier, 27, was captured in an office and taken to jail to await charges.

Allgier got the gun from corrections officer Stephen Anderson while he was in an examination room at the University of Utah orthopedic center awaiting an MRI for back pain around 7:45 a.m., university Police Chief Scott Folsom said.

Anderson, 60, a 22-year-veteran, was shot in the head, authorities said.

Allgier forced two people out of a Ford Explorer outside the med center, Brede said; neither was hurt.  Officers chased the SUV at speeds up to 100 mph. Two Salt Lake City squad cars crashed into each other while trying to cut off Allgier, Brede said, but there were no serious injuries.

Police pursuing Allgier placed tire spikes on Interstate 215, but he still was able to drive several miles before bailing out in the Arby’s drive-thru lane, police said.

How about not letting prisoners get MRI’s?  And how about pairing younger, stronger guards with young psychopaths?  This idiot Allgier can kiss any chance of parole goodbye.  He just went from jailtime for illegal possession of a firearm to capital murder.

Littlest Headbanger

by Pat — Categories: HumorNo Comments

My brother sent me this clip and its too cute and hilarious not to post.  All this kid needs is a speaker to dive from and a crowd to surf upon.

Politics of Zealous Blacklisters

by Pat — Categories: CyberNo Comments

I think that blacklists are a very important aspect of network security organizations.  In fact, router blacklists may be considered one of the first lines of defense.  But some organizations are a bit zealous in their blacklisting and are swollen with their own self-importance.  And once blacklisting groups begin to wander into punditry on what is legal on the internet, the likelihood of lawsuits by phishers, or believe they are important enough to call domain registries onto the carpet for not playing nice, it may be time to find a new blacklisting organization.

The Spamhaus Project

Thanks to SANS, we have a pointer to SpamHaus’ tirade against nic.at. 

spamhaus.org put the IP range of the Austrian domain registry (nic.at) on their Spamhaus Block List, even though they did not send spam messages. By doing that, they wanted to force nic.at to remove specific .at domains, whose subdomains reportedly host phishing sites. However nic.at did not comply as they claimed it would violate their general terms and conditions and it would also breach Austrian jurisdiction.

During the next few days different allegations occurred: It was claimed the subdomains where hacked (so the registration itself was all right) and nic.at referred spamhaus.org to the specific hosts’ and registrar as the specific problem was located there. The number of offending pages varies from 15 to hundreds , depending who (and also when) you asked. nic.at changed IP addresses only to be blocked a few hours later again. spamhaus.org refused to comment on its actions, making some issues even more confusing.

On the 21st spamhaus.org stopped the blocking (only listing nic.at as supporter to “name and shame”, still existing today), as they reported all offending pages are gone. nic.at countered that they did not remove a single domain, but the specific hosts’ finally reacted (to who they had referred spamhaus.org right from the start).

Now the Internet Service Provider Austria [ISPA] is warning its members against spamhaus.org because of their “overreaction”.

SpamHaus’ account of the issue is here, including their admission that the blacklisting was a “name and shame” publicity stunt.  To their credit, SpamHaus tried very hard to solve the issue of nic.at’s lack of response by sending agents to the registrar’s offices to speak with representatives.  But when that wasn’t enough, SpamHaus blacklisted a single non-operational IP address of the Nic itself.

Naming and shaming does indeed work.  But you don’t want to use a working blacklist to do this, especially when so many government and private industries use that blacklist for keeping their infrastructure secure.  If you want to name and shame, get a blog.

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