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Taxes are Third Most Painful Substance to Witches

Right behind Fire and Water. In Romania, the government is cracking down on deadbeats who have jobs but don’t pay taxes. Like astrologers and witches. And boy are the witches pissed.

From the AP here:

Angry witches are using cat excrement and dead dogs to cast spells on the president and government who are forcing them to pay taxes. Also in the eye of the taxman are fortune tellers, who should have seen it coming.

Witches from Romania’s eastern and western regions will descend to the southern plains and the Danube River Thursday to threaten the government with spells and spirits.

A dozen witches will head to the Danube to put a hex on the government and hurl mandrake into the river “so evil will befall them,” said a witch named Alisia. She identified herself with one name, as is customary among witches.

The tax on witches went into effect Saturday as part of the government’s drive to crack down on tax evasion in a country that is in recession. Like any self-employed person, they will pay 16 percent income tax and make contributions to health and pension programs.

And it’s not only witches: Astrologers, embalmers, valets and driving instructors are now considered by law to be working real jobs, making it harder for them to avoid income tax.

Queen witch Bratara Buzea, 63, who was imprisoned in 1977 for witchcraft under Ceausescu’s repressive communist regime, is furious about the new law. Sitting cross-legged in her villa in the lake resort of Mogosoaia, just north of Bucharest, she said Wednesday she planned to cast a spell using a particularly effective concoction of cat excrement, a dead dog and a chorus of witches.

‘My curses always work!” she cackled in a smoky voice. She sat next to her wood-burning stove, surrounded by potions, charms, holy water and ceramic pots

Lets just burn the queen witch and throw buckets of water on the rest. Cat shit and dead dogs? How is this stupid woman any different than a hoarder?

Dr. Jones

Do not talk about fight club. Oops.

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