This Week’s South Park

Is titled “Miss Teacher Bangs a Boy.” My wife and I saw a preview of a blonde teacher lying in bed talking about her experiences with her paramour. And according to the message boards, Cartman, newly appointed Hall Monitor, takes grave offense that this crime was committed in his jurisdiction, disrespecting his authoritah!

All of the really bad, dark, horrible, childhood-ruining things- like being forced to be Paris Hilton’s dog, or having your eye put out by a throwing star, or being tricked into believing that you are the sole survivor of a holocaust- happens to one beloved character. So he would be the logical victim of this upcoming very special episode in which a student gets raped.

Good Luck Butters!