BelchSpeak
I can't believe that came from your mouth!
Awesome Mechanic’s Chair
Dec 20th
I actually saw this on Fox News a couple of weeks ago. Now its on Reddit, and it is pretty awesome. Too bad the designer of the chair makes such crappy YouTube videos!
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Rolling My Eyes: Adam Lanza was Devil Worshipper
Dec 19th
Now the latest crazy theory about Sandy Hook killer Adam Lanza is that he had made a website that showed he worshiped the devil. Oh, and it had gothic lettering too. As a bonus, if the local barber had precognitive powers, he would have murdered the boy.
From the DailyMail here:
The Sandy Hook gunman worshiped the devil and had an online page dedicated to Satan, a former classmate revealed, as his childhood barber recalls Adam Lanza never spoke and would stare at the floor every time he had his hair cut.
Lanza’s worshiping page had the word ‘Devil’ written in red, Gothic-style letters against a black background, Trevor L. Todd told The National Enquirer, something which he said was ‘weird’ and ‘gave him the chills’.
The FBI are trying to piece together his smashed up hard drive to see if his online footprint will reveal any motive for the killing, but they strongly believe he made use of devil-worshiping and suicide sites and boasted of his murder plans on message forums.
Adam Lanza’s childhood barber Bob Skuba told CNN that Adam would never speak or even look at him any time he came in for a cut, which was every six weeks for years. ‘It’s just weird that I actually touched him. I’d tried to joke with him,’ Skuba said. ‘He wouldn’t even look at me. He would just be looking down at the tiles the whole time. ‘I wish I would have killed him then. Or he should have killed himself a long time ago. He would have saved us all the trouble.’
It is clear this scrawny twisted lunatic didn’t value life. But claims of Satanic worship seems almost cliche to me. I just wish when the end came that Adam had gone in order: kill self first, and then shoot schoolkids.
(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Woman Used FoodStamp Card to Buy iPads; Arrested
Dec 19th
Its not going to be a holly jolly Christmas for this stupid Obama voter who tried to buy iPads with her EBT card. If she wants to buy high tech gear, maybe she should get a job.
(1 votes, average: 6.00 out of 6) Loading ...
Common Sense School Security
Dec 18th
In my county of Fairfax, secondary and high schools have something called “school resource officers” which are off-duty or retired policemen who keep those schools more secure. But elementary schools do not have such officers. I happen to think its an oversight, and no one until last Friday could imagine the horror of an evil bastard gunning down little kids. But its time to tighten this security.
In the wake of the Sandy Hook Elementary Massacre, there have been lots of knee-jerk ideas thrown around about banning guns or arming the teachers. My pal Trench is right about arming teachers. It would be a bad idea. Too many guns would be in reach of evil bastards in the classrooms, and as I have often documented, teachers aren’t the sharpest knives in the drawers anyways. They would not make good security personnel. And I doubt the liberal teachers’ unions would allow that anyways.
My first idea was that each school have one or two armed security officers- but I dismissed that idea after remembering that most security guards are fat, lazy and couldn’t outrun me, much less a more fit person. I’ve been to quite a few downtown DC agencies, and other than the Pentagon, most front-desk security officers seem poorly trained, uneducated, and fat. At least they have guns. That deters most mischief.
No, the real way to increase security is to get well-trained and armed security staff to go to the schools. Fairfax Police should use each Elementary School as a morning and afternoon staging area for their normal patrol routines. Right now they each start their daily routines from one of the 8 district precincts in the county. Instead of starting at the precinct stations, they should start their patrols from the schools. And let them enjoy donuts and coffee in the teachers’ lounge, or even have the schools dedicate an unused room or desk for the use of officers on duty.
This solution raises the visibility of police at schools, and it also disperses police nicely geographically so they are always close to respond to incidents around the county. This could be accomplished with very little additional money and minimal hassle. And it would go a long way to providing security at schools and peace of mind for parents.
(1 votes, average: 6.00 out of 6) Loading ...4 PM Music: She and Him – “Baby, Its Cold Outside”
Dec 18th
A wonderful animated music video about a guy who just can’t get away.
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Teachers Union Owns 6% of Bushmaster
Dec 18th
Oh, the irony. Bushmaster is publicly traded stock via its parent company Freedom Group. One of the majority stockholders are the California State Teachers’ Retirement System, the pension program for California teacher unions.
From CNN here:
Do you know who owns more than a 6% stake in the maker of .223 Bushmaster rifles, like the one used last Friday to murder 20 first graders and seven adults in Newtown, Connecticut? California public schoolteachers.
The company in question is Freedom Group, a privately-held firearms conglomerate formed by private equity and hedge fund group Cerberus Capital Management. Cerberus created the platform in April 2006 via the acquisition of Bushmaster, after which it added another 10 makers of firearms, ammunition and accessories (including Remington, Marlin Arms and Barnes Bullets).
The California State Teachers’ Retirement System (CalSTRS) committed to invest a whopping $500 million into a $7.5 billion Cerberus fund that has helped bankroll Freedom Group. That means that it effectively could own a 6.67% stake in the gun maker.
There are all kinds of hysterics still going on over the Sandy Hook Massacre. Calls to defund gun manufacturers by frothing liberals are ridiculous, and it wouldn’t solve anything. But I do enjoy the poke in the eye liberals feel knowing that teacher pensions are invested in the company.
(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...How Cold Is It?
Dec 18th
It gets pretty cold in Russia. And when you toss a pot of boiling water out the window there, it instantly turns to fog.
(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Chuck Norris Doesn’t Like Gangnam Style
Dec 16th
I pretty much had the same reaction when I saw the video for the first time, but I just used a remote to change the channel.
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Time to Round Up All the Asspies
Dec 16th
In the wake of the Sandy Hook Elementary School shooting, it was revealed that Adam Lanza, the evil killer of those children and teachers had Aspergers syndrome according to many reports. Aspergers is often described as leaving its sufferers incapable of determining right from wrong and unsympathetic or unempathetic to the feelings of others. The Virginia Tech Hokie killer, Cho Seung-Hui was reportedly an Asspie. The most notorious hacker, Gary McKinnon, avoided extradition and criminal charges by having Aspergers. Many liberals are now clamoring to confiscate guns from law-abiding citizens, but guns aren’t the problem. Asspies are. The time to round these uncaring misfits up is now.
Hokie Killer and Noted Asspie Seung Cho.
Adam Lanza, noted Asspie tried to beat Cho’s High Score for murder.
We should have an arm-flapping forced march across the prairie, pushing these uncaring, souless people into a Supermax facility. Since they have no compassion or emotion, its not like it would be a “Trail of Tears” or anything. Maybe a “Trail of Fail.” Once they arrive at their concentration camp, each will be assigned a hugbox and allowed to access an internet bulletin board where they can annoy normal people with their self-absorbed ramblings.
(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...That Mall Santa Has a Tough Job
Dec 14th
Its time for the annual Belch.Com Scary Santa Photo Stream. These were some of my favorites snapped in the past few days showing kids freaking the hell out when a jolly bearded dwarf makes them sit on his lap.
We took Cartney to see Santa yesterday and he had a long conversation with Santa. He had worry lines in his forehead as he explained to the bearded man what he wanted for Christmas, while also explaining how he really has been a good boy, despite what his parents may have reported to Santa.
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Sickened: Sandy Hook Elementary School Slaughter
Dec 14th
I can’t fathom the sorrow of the parents of the slain children in Connecticut right now. I’m sickened to my stomach, and its all I can do to not run up to my kid’s school and bring him home for the day. Sandy Hook works like most other modern American schools today. You cannot just walk in; you have to be buzzed in by an administrator.
These schools need to get very serious, and right now, about protecting our kids. This school was run by women, and unarmed women at that. Every visitor to a school needs to be met by an armed officer, period. The liberal fantasy that guns shouldn’t be on school property has once again turned out to be a tragic security vulnerability for the safety of children.
God help those parents. I might throw up now.
(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Homeless Man Recycles Himself
Dec 13th
A 41 Year Old drug-addicted loser in Fort Worth, TX tried to sleep off his drug-haze inside a dumpster. He awoke when the trash truck came to take him and his buddies, the coffee grounds and banana peels to the landfill.
From CBS here:
A 41-year-old man has died of injuries received when the garbage bin in which he was sleeping was emptied into a trash compactor in Fort Worth.
The man apparently was seeking shelter from the cold early Wednesday morning when a garbage truck lifted the bin in which he was sleeping and emptied it into its compactor. Officer Sharron Neal says workers stopped the compractor when the man began to scream. He was in cardiac arrest when he was removed but revived. He died later while having surgery at John Peter Smith Hospital.
The Tarrant County Medical Examiner’s Office identified the man as Chad Adams and said he died of crush injuries to his pelvis.
The company that owns the trash truck, Progressive Waste Solutions, describes the accident as “unfortunate” and is investigating.
Isn’t everything with a “progressive” label really something to do with garbage? Its nice to see that at least one city knows how to dispose of their homeless properly.
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John McAfee is a Crazy Bastard
Dec 13th
John McAfee is back on American soil after fleeing Belize in the wake of his neighbor’s murder investigation. He spent three weeks on the run and turned up in Guatemala where he was arrested for illegal entry into the country. He begged for asylum, faked an illness and was deported to the United States. Now he is penniless and hanging out in South Beach, having abandoned his fortune and property in Belize.
From ABC here:
John McAfee’s month-long international run from police through two Central American nations ended with a flight to Miami, where the businessman who says he abandoned his fortune admitted to playing the “crazy card.”
He eventually snuck out of the airport in a cab and headed to South Beach. After walking down famed Ocean Drive to the bewilderment of tourists and eating sushi, his first meal in three days, he sat down with ABC News and admitted to playing the “crazy card” and says he is broke.
“I have nothing now,” McAfee said. He claims he left everything behind in Belize, including $20 million in investments and about 15 properties. “I’ve got a pair of clothes and shoes, my friend dropped off some cash.”
After three weeks ducking authorities in Belize, by hiding in attics, in the jungle and in dingy hotels, he turned up in Guatemala Dec. 3.
Barely a day later he was detained for entering the country illegally. As Guatemala officials grappled with how to handle his request for asylum and the Belize government’s demand for his deportation, McAfee fell ill. The mysterious illness, described by his attorney alternately as a heart ailment or a nervous breakdown, led to a scene with reporters chasing his ambulance down the narrow streets of Guatemala City and right into the emergency room, where McAfee appeared unresponsive.
He now says it was all a ruse: “It was a deception but who did it hurt? I look pretty healthy, don’t I?” “I was on the run with a 20-year-old girl for three and a half weeks inside their borders and everyone was looking for me, and they did not catch me,” he said. “I escaped, was captured and they tried to send me back. Now I’m sitting in Miami. There had to be some ineptness.”
He denies any involvement in his neighbor’s death but adds that he is not particularly concerned about clearing his name. He is focused on getting his 20-year-old and 17-year-old girlfriends out of Belize and says he has no idea what he’ll do next, where he’ll live or how he’ll support himself.
McAfee is crazy. But he’s also interesting and has had some wild adventures. I bet he finds his way to a reality TV show within a month.
(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Lifehack: Skinning a Deer With a Golfball and a Pickup Truck
Dec 13th
This video is awesome for its simplicity, but it also makes me wonder how many other things were tried before they found something that works?
(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...No iPhones for YOU! Chinese Lady Tased at Mall for Buying Too Many iPhones
Dec 12th
Not entirely clear what happened here. Some non-English speaking woman tried to buy too many iPhones and then threw a tantrum at the mall that got her tazed.
From WCVB here:
A local family says a language barrier may have resulted in police using a Taser on a woman after she tried to buy too many iPhones at a local mall. Police, however, say the incident isn’t that clear cut.
A Boston area family says a language barrier may have resulted in police using a Taser on a woman after she tried to buy too many iPhones at a local mall.
“So my mom says she don’t know why they called the police, because she doesn’t understand what they are talking about,” her 12-year-old daughter Jiao Jay said.
Jay said her mother bought two iPhones last Friday, and was told that was the limit. When she took video of others she claimed were buying more, the store manager asked her to leave.
The confrontation involving the Taser happened when Li went to the store on Monday to pick up two iPhones she ordered online.
“The management of the store asked us to have her removed. The officer approached her, told her she wasn’t welcome in the store, and she refused to leave,” Nashua Police Capt. Bruce Hansen said.
Police say the store had issued a stay-away order against Li. She was told she was under arrest after repeatedly being told to leave the store. She didn’t submit to the arrest. The officer used the Taser on her to get her to submit to the arrest.
Dang, if Ms. Li wanted a bunch of iPhones she should go back to her native country and manufacture them by the hour for nickels of pay. Anyone else think Apple fanbois should get tased when the public thinks they’ve purchased enough Apple Tech?
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Clackamas Shooter Jacob Tyler Roberts Was Troubled; Broken
Dec 12th
Jacob Tyler Roberts, the Oregon Mall Shooter in Clackamas came from a broken home and had to transfer schools a lot as a youngster, likely due to bad grades and trouble at school. After High School, this troubled slacker couldn’t keep a job, lived for months in an apartment without paying rent until he was evicted, and could not afford to pay speeding fines which resulted in lost driving privileges. He was likely active in the Occupy Movement and probably smoked a lot of pot. He put an end to his own miserable existence by putting a bullet to his head, but unfortunately not before he murdered Steve Forsyth, a father of two and Cindy Yuille.
From OregonLive here:
Jacob Tyler Roberts, 22, was the masked man who stormed into Clackamas Town Center Tuesday afternoon, fatally shooting two people and wounding another before turning a gun on himself.
Roberts, of Portland, does not appear to have a criminal history in Oregon. Roberts stole the weapon — an AR-15 — earlier in the day from someone he knew. He shot randomly in the attack and the motive remains unclear. He was found dead of what appears to be a self-inflicted wound.
Roberts had planned to go into the Navy after he graduated from high school, but he hurt his leg, so he wasn’t eligible, said Rosalie DeDore, a friend of Roberts’ stepfather. “After that, everything kind of fell apart for him,” she said.
He broke up with his girlfriend in summer, another friend said.
Roberts had two speeding tickets earlier this year. His Oregon driver’s license was suspended this year, according to Oregon Department of Motor Vehicle records. He held a commercial driver’s license which was also suspended. Roberts and a woman were evicted last summer from their Happy Valley apartment.
Roberts bounced around multiple schools in several local districts. He attended Ardenwald and Mount Scott elementary schools in North Clackamas and Lane Middle School in Portland. He went onto Milwaukie High School and then transferred to Oregon City High.
What a loser. Definitely a product of his crappy upbringing. For the other mutants out there wishing to get a high score with a mass shooting, just do everyone a favor and cut to the chase and put the bullet in your own brain first, and spare the tragedies of lost lives that are actually worth something.
(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Dumb Ways to Die Parody Involving Video Games
Dec 11th
Yeah, this is kinda hilarious. Especially getting your split screen players mixed up, which happens to me a lot.
(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Turn of the Century Convenience
Dec 11th
Turn of the Century Convenience, a photo by BelchSpeak on Flickr.
I am a huge fan of old saloon photos. I tend to collect them when I’m on the road as I am now outside of San Francisco. This one was hanging on a men’s room wall, and I snagged the photo with the Genius Scan app for iPhone.
This shot was taken in 1904 and features the white jacketed barkeeps, the mustachioed owner and a few patrons at the bar swilling their usual frothy beverages. What makes this photo unique, however, is the forward-thinking of turn-of-the-century bar design.
It has a urinal trough right at the bar. You don’t even have to get off your bar stool.
I know a bunch of people think this would be gross, but I think this is an invention whose time needs to return. Toss in a couple of modern urinal cakes, some plasma high def tvs, and sit for hours and watch the games without those nagging interruptions!
FYI, urine is sterile. Plus, if you’ve ever been to a bar that smells like piss anyways, now you could go to one that smells like piss for a reason.
(1 votes, average: 6.00 out of 6) Loading ...
US Secret Service Stored Backup Tapes on the DC Metro
Dec 10th
The Secret Service was supposed to store its backup tapes offsite at an Olney Maryland location. But the Marylander they entrusted the job to get the tapes there left two backup tapes on the Metro. Then they tried to cover up their mistake according to the USSS Inspector General.
From Sophos here:
A contractor working for the US Secret Service walked onto a Washington, DC Metro train carrying two tapes full of extremely sensitive data. He got off at his stop carrying neither.
A few years later, the US Secret Service is under investigation for what’s being described as the “immense breach”.
The tapes contained personal information about all agency employees, contacts and overseas informants.
The extremely sensitive personal data included Social Security Numbers, home addresses, information about family members, phone numbers, dates of birth, medical information, bank account numbers, employment information, driver’s license numbers, passport numbers, and biometric information – all of which were secured only with “very basic encryption”.
The tapes were lost on the Red Line of the Metro in 2008 by a reportedly young, low-ranking employee of a private contracting company hired to transport them from headquarters to a secure vault in Olney, Md., where government agencies store contingency plans, documents and other backup material.
The employee volunteered to drop off the tapes because he lived near the vault, but he got off at the Glenmont, Md., Metro stop without the tapes
This is a major screw-up. From the description, this wasn’t just employee information. This was data from every employee’s extensive background check to obtain top secret clearances, including fingerprints. And you are supposed to hire a service to pick up the tapes and transport them securely to the offsite storage site, not hand them to a contractor who lives nearby. I wonder if the contracting company lost its contract?
(1 votes, average: 6.00 out of 6) Loading ...
College Students Poison Classmates with Pot Brownies
Dec 10th
Two students who are probably already failing out of school anyways, are under arrest for poisoning their professor and classmates with brownies loaded with THC butter. THC is the psycho-active ingredient in marijuana.
From GlobalDispatch here:
two University of Colorado Boulder students brought brownies to one of their classes as part of something called “Bring Food Friday.” They shared the snacks with their fellow classmates and their professor.
These brownies however, were baked with marijuana and led to three people being taken to the hospital, authorities report.
An investigation revealed that the three hospitalized victims — and five other classmates — were suffering from the effects of tetrahydrocannabinol (THC), the active ingredient in marijuana,” University of Colorado Boulder Police said. “Two students — Thomas Ricardo Cunningham, 21, and Mary Elizabeth Essa, 19 — baked THC-laced brownies for the class as part of a ‘bring food day.’ The professor and classmates were unaware that the brownies contained THC.”
Cunningham and Essa are facing felony charges, including assault in the second degree and inducing consumption of controlled substances by fraudulent means.
I think the students should be sued as well as kicked out of the school. Deliberate poisonings via THC are only going to go up now that some states are legalizing the drug. And some might actually die from the poisoning. One Colorado bitch tried to kill her grandson with THC but thankfully killed herself, ridding the world of a dangerous dumbass.
(1 votes, average: 6.00 out of 6) Loading ...
