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<channel>
	<title>BelchSpeak &#187; You&#8217;re Fired!</title>
	<atom:link href="http://www.belch.com/blog/category/youre-fired/feed/" rel="self" type="application/rss+xml" />
	<link>http://www.belch.com/blog</link>
	<description>I can&#039;t believe that came from your mouth!</description>
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		<title>Georgia Stowaway Discovered in Moscow</title>
		<link>http://www.belch.com/blog/2013/06/12/georgia-stowaway-discovered-in-moscow/</link>
		<comments>http://www.belch.com/blog/2013/06/12/georgia-stowaway-discovered-in-moscow/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 12 Jun 2013 18:57:39 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dr. Jones</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Bizarre]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[fail]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Stupid People]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Travel]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[You're Fired!]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[airplane]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[stowaway]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[worst way to die]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.belch.com/blog/?p=14393</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[A black man from Georgia stowed away on a jetliner by holding onto the landing gear. That was his last mistake. Crews in Moscow found his frozen body along with blood stains after seven additional flights. From the WaTimes here: An iFly jet made seven flights carrying a dead man in its wheel well before&#8230;]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>A black man from Georgia stowed away on a jetliner by holding onto the landing gear.  That was his last mistake.  Crews in Moscow found his frozen body along with blood stains after seven additional flights.</p>
<p><a href="http://www.belch.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/wheelwell.jpg"><img src="http://www.belch.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/wheelwell-e1371063419828.jpg" alt="wheelwell" width="500" height="336" class="alignnone size-full wp-image-14394" /></a></p>
<p>From <a href="http://www.washingtontimes.com/news/2013/jun/11/plane-flew-seven-flights-dead-stowaway-wheel-well">the WaTimes here</a>:</p>
<blockquote><p>An iFly jet made seven flights carrying a dead man in its wheel well before crews in Moscow discovered the body.<br />
Maintenance workers <strong>noticed blood stains last Thursday</strong> on the plane’s main landing gear struts. After inspecting the wheel well <strong>they found the remains of a man carrying a Georgia passport</strong>.<br />
“According to a preliminary conclusion, <strong>the Afro-American man died from freezing</strong>. The man was apparently flying without a ticket,” the Investigative Committee said on its website.<br />
Authorities say the stowaway boarded the plane four days before he was found dead.</p></blockquote>
<p>There is no heat in the wheel wells, and its freezing at 38,000 feet.  What a dumb way to go.
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		<item>
		<title>Snowden Exaggerated A Few Claims</title>
		<link>http://www.belch.com/blog/2013/06/11/snowden-exaggerated-a-few-claims/</link>
		<comments>http://www.belch.com/blog/2013/06/11/snowden-exaggerated-a-few-claims/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 11 Jun 2013 20:23:26 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dr. Jones</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Crime]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Cyber]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Politics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[You're Fired!]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[edward snowden]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[nsa]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.belch.com/blog/?p=14386</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[The NSA Whistleblower did make some exaggerated claims in his released video to the Guardian. And, he had a hottie acrobatic stripper girlfriend who declared her superpowers to be pole-related. Do exaggerating his claims and having a stripper girlfriend lessen his credibility? Perhaps. Legal Insurrection&#8217;s Mandy Nagy posts five questions that she would ask Snowden&#8230;]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>The NSA Whistleblower did make some exaggerated claims in his released video to the Guardian.  And, he had a hottie acrobatic stripper girlfriend who declared her superpowers to be pole-related.  Do exaggerating his claims and having a stripper girlfriend lessen his credibility?  Perhaps.  Legal Insurrection&#8217;s Mandy Nagy posts five questions that she would ask Snowden about:</p>
<p><a href="http://www.belch.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/PRISM-slide-crop-001.jpg"><img src="http://www.belch.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/PRISM-slide-crop-001.jpg" alt="PRISM slide crop" width="460" height="329" class="alignnone size-full wp-image-14369" /></a></p>
<p>From <a href="http://legalinsurrection.com/2013/06/five-clarifications-we-cant-ask-of-edward-snowden/">LI here:</a></p>
<blockquote><p><strong>1)  Edward Snowden didn’t make $200,000 a year.</strong></p>
<p>Booz Allen Hamilton says the annual salary it paid Snowden was $122,000, not the $200,000 Snowden has asserted.  The company also confirms that it has since terminated Snowden for violations of the firm’s code of ethics and firm policy.
</p></blockquote>
<p>Yeah, even for a position in Hawaii, he may have received a slight stipend for cost of living increase, and maybe he got a relocation fee, but still that might not have amounted to 200K.  When I first read his claims that Booz was paying him that much, I was tempted to go work for them.  But I hate contract work for the Feds, so nyah.</p>
<blockquote><p><strong>2)  The NSA surveillance program capabilities asserted by Snowden may have been overstated.</strong></p></blockquote>
<p>See my prior explanation about how the system likely really works at a previous post.  Snowden did say he had the &#8220;authority&#8221; to tap anyone, given an email address.  I think he meant &#8220;privileges&#8221; not &#8220;authority.&#8221;  Privileges are strictly enforced and guarded at the NSA.  Snowden might have had superuser privileges, but even as a sysadmin, I doubt it.  If Snowden didn&#8217;t realize this tech is based on packet capture and not server backdooring, then I doubt he ever looked at this system up close.  I still think he stumbled onto some scary slides.</p>
<blockquote><p><strong>3)  Snowden may have had help.</strong></p>
<p>Federal investigators say they aren’t convinced that Snowden worked alone.  A source told ABC News, “The FBI is not 100 percent focused on this one guy…Agents are not just guided by what he claims.”  And some in the industry are very skeptical that Snowden himself could have had access to all that has been leaked.</p></blockquote>
<p>I personally think this guy was an Anonymous sympathizer, but we&#8217;ll see how it all plays out.</p>
<blockquote><p><strong>4)  Snowden was on the radar before he was publicly identified as the leaker.</strong></p>
<p><strong>5)  Snowden’s timeline of employment and contact with journalists is confusing, as was his access level.</strong></p>
<p>Booz Allen said in its statement that Snowden was employed there for less than three months.  Prior to Booz Allen, Snowden says he was with Dell as a contractor, working for the NSA.  </p></blockquote>
<p>Yeah, hopping from one contract to another is very common in the federal contracting world, and its not like this guy was going to put his employment timeline on LinkedIn.
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		<title>Crazy Liberal Actress Sent Obama Ricin Letters</title>
		<link>http://www.belch.com/blog/2013/06/09/crazy-liberal-actress-sent-obama-ricin-letters/</link>
		<comments>http://www.belch.com/blog/2013/06/09/crazy-liberal-actress-sent-obama-ricin-letters/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 09 Jun 2013 16:34:41 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dr. Jones</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Bizarre]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Crime]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[fail]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Obama]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Politics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Stupid People]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[You're Fired!]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Zombies]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[hate crimes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[liberals]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[zombies]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.belch.com/blog/?p=14377</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[A crazy liberal actress thought it would be ingenious to kill two birds with one stone- get an insta-divorce and also smear 2nd Amendment Tea Party types by sending ricin-laced letters to President Obama and NYC Mayor Bloomberg. Her idea was to frame her husband- a military Vet- for the crime. Things didn&#8217;t go according&#8230;]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>A crazy liberal actress thought it would be ingenious to kill two birds with one stone-  get an insta-divorce and also smear 2nd Amendment Tea Party types by sending ricin-laced letters to President Obama and NYC Mayor Bloomberg.  Her idea was to frame her husband- a military Vet-  for the crime.  Things didn&#8217;t go according to plan mostly because this bitch is crazy and stupid.</p>
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<p style="font-size:11px; font-family:Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; color: #999; margin-top: 5px; background: transparent; text-align: center; width: 420px;">Visit NBCNews.com for <a style="text-decoration:none !important; border-bottom: 1px dotted #999 !important; font-weight:normal !important; height: 13px; color:#5799DB !important;" href="http://www.nbcnews.com">breaking news</a>, <a href="http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/3032507" style="text-decoration:none !important; border-bottom: 1px dotted #999 !important; font-weight:normal !important; height: 13px; color:#5799DB !important;">world news</a>, and <a href="http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/3032072" style="text-decoration:none !important; border-bottom: 1px dotted #999 !important; font-weight:normal !important; height: 13px; color:#5799DB !important;">news about the economy</a></p>
<p>From <a href="http://abcnews.go.com/US/wireStory/ap-sources-texas-woman-arrested-ricin-case-19349834">ABC here</a>:<br />
<blockquote>Shannon Richardson had been married to her husband less than two years when she went to authorities and told them her suspicions: <strong>He was the one who had mailed ricin-laced letters to President Barack Obama and New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg threatening violence against gun-control advocates.</strong></p>
<p>When investigators looked closer, they reached a different conclusion: <strong>It was the 35-year-old pregnant actress who had sent the letters, and she tried to frame her estranged husband in a bizarre case of marital conflict crossing with bioterrorism</strong>.</p>
<p>Richardson, a mother of five who has played bit roles on television and in movies, was arrested and charged with mailing a threatening communication to the president. <strong>The federal charge carries up to 10 years in prison</strong>.</p>
<p>Richardson contacted authorities on May 30 and implicated her husband, Nathaniel Richardson. She described finding small, brown beans with white speckles — a description matching the key ingredient in ricin, castor beans — at the couple&#8217;s home in New Boston, Texas. She also told investigators that she had found a sticky note on her husband&#8217;s desk with addresses for Bloomberg and Obama.</p>
<p>But <strong>she later failed a polygraph test</strong>, the document said, and investigators looking into her story found numerous inconsistencies. Among them: Nathaniel Richardson would have been at work when Internet searches tied to the letters were made on the couple&#8217;s laptop and when the envelopes containing the letters were postmarked.</p>
<p>Finally, in an interview with authorities on Thursday, Shannon Richardson admitted that she had received syringes and lye — a caustic chemical used in making ricin — in the mail; that she had printed the labels for the letters; and that she mailed them. However, <strong>she insisted her husband typed them and &#8220;made her&#8221; print and send them</strong>.</p></blockquote>
<p>Okay, this guy is now going to win every contest for who has the craziest ex-girlfriend.  Plus, she has five kids and only got married to this guy two years ago and she goes to these bizarre lengths to get out of the relationship?  She should have just had one of those &#8220;We need to talk&#8221; conversations.
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		<title>Contractors Build Man Caves in EPA Warehouse</title>
		<link>http://www.belch.com/blog/2013/06/06/contractors-build-man-caves-in-epa-warehouse/</link>
		<comments>http://www.belch.com/blog/2013/06/06/contractors-build-man-caves-in-epa-warehouse/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 06 Jun 2013 17:08:11 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dr. Jones</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Jobs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Politics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[You're Fired!]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[epa]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[lazy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[warehouse]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.belch.com/blog/?p=14363</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Building mancaves inside of large shipping spaces in warehouses is nothing really new. It is likely that the majority of all federal agencies that require warehousing space will find similar nests inside. But having the Inspector General find such a surprise is always pretty lulzy. From GovExec here: A warehouse maintained by contractors for the&#8230;]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Building mancaves inside of large shipping spaces in warehouses is nothing really new.  It is likely that the majority of all federal agencies that require warehousing space will find similar nests inside.  But having the Inspector General find such a surprise is always pretty lulzy.</p>
<p><a href="http://www.belch.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/mancave.jpg"><img src="http://www.belch.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/mancave.jpg" alt="mancave" width="350" height="234" class="alignnone size-full wp-image-14364" /></a></p>
<p>From <a href="http://www.govexec.com/contracting/2013/06/secret-man-caves-found-epa-warehouse/64202/">GovExec here</a>:</p>
<blockquote><p>A warehouse maintained by contractors for the Environmental Protection Agency <strong>contained secret rooms full of exercise equipment, televisions and couches</strong>, according to an internal audit.</p>
<p>EPA’s inspector general found contractors used partitions, screens and piled up boxes to hide the rooms from security cameras in the 70,000 square-foot building located in Landover, Md. The warehouse &#8212; used for inventory storage &#8212; is owned by the General Services Administration and leased to the EPA for about $750,000 per year.</p>
<p>The EPA has issued a stop work order to Apex Logistics LLC, the responsible contractor, ensuring the company’s workers no longer have access to the site &#8212; EPA security officials escorted contractor personnel off the premises on May 17 &#8212; and ending all payments on the contract.</p>
<p>“The warehouse contained multiple unauthorized and hidden personal spaces created by and for the workers that included televisions, refrigerators, radios, microwaves, chairs and couches,” the IG report said. “These spaces contained personal items, including photos, pin ups, calendars, clothing, books, magazines and videos.”</p></blockquote>
<p>And of course, this was in Maryland, one of the most liberal states in the country.  Working at this warehouse must have been the equivalent of collecting a welfare check-  which now some of these fired workers will be applying for soon.
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		<item>
		<title>Lulzsec&#8217;s Jeremy Hammond Pleads Guilty for the Lulz</title>
		<link>http://www.belch.com/blog/2013/05/29/lulzsecs-jeremy-hammond-pleads-guilty-for-the-lulz/</link>
		<comments>http://www.belch.com/blog/2013/05/29/lulzsecs-jeremy-hammond-pleads-guilty-for-the-lulz/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 29 May 2013 13:36:15 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dr. Jones</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Crime]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Cyber]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[You're Fired!]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[anonymous]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[jeremy hammond]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[lulzsec]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[wikileaks]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.belch.com/blog/?p=14318</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Jeremy Hammond, a radical anarchist and sloppy hacker, pleaded guilty to hacking charges in New York in a plea bargaining agreement. He could face ten years in prison. From LegalInsurrection here: Jeremy Hammond, a notorious hacker and anarchist from the Chicago area, pleaded guilty this morning to hacking charges in a New York courtroom under&#8230;]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Jeremy Hammond, a radical anarchist and sloppy hacker, pleaded guilty to hacking charges in New York in a plea bargaining agreement.  He could face ten years in prison.</p>
<p><a href="http://www.belch.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/Jeremy-Hammond.jpg"><img src="http://www.belch.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/Jeremy-Hammond.jpg" alt="Jeremy-Hammond" width="239" height="300" class="alignnone size-full wp-image-11136" /></a></p>
<p>From <a href="http://legalinsurrection.com/2013/05/radical-chicago-hacker-pleads-guilty-to-stratfor-leak/">LegalInsurrection here</a>:</p>
<blockquote><p>Jeremy Hammond, a notorious hacker and anarchist from the Chicago area, pleaded guilty this morning to hacking charges in a New York courtroom under the terms of a plea agreement.</p>
<p>Hammond was initially charged in March 2012 with one count of computer hacking conspiracy, one count of computer hacking, and one count of conspiracy to commit access device fraud.  Several others also associated with the hacker collective Anonymous and its splinter faction LulzSec were also charged that day, in connection with the guilty plea of one of their co-conspirators, Hector Monsegur aka “Sabu.”</p>
<p>The information that was stolen from Stratfor was then turned over to Wikileaks, which began publishing the cache in February of 2012, billing it as the “Global Intelligence Files.”</p>
<p>Indeed, the information that was leaked as a result of the Stratfor hack may have exposed some “secrets” about the firm, though it was largely scoffed at by people in the industry, many of whom claim that Stratfor took itself more seriously than anyone else did.  Still, this was a private firm with private clients and subscribers, all of whom became victims due to the actions of Hammond.</p>
<p>Hammond is scheduled to be sentenced on September 6th.  His plea agreement could carry a sentence of up to 10 years in prison and millions in restitution payments.</p></blockquote>
<p>Good riddance to bad rubbish.  Hammond delivered a whackjob anarchist speech to DefCon in 2004-  I was present at this speech when the crowd jeered and taunted little Jeremy that he had seen Fight Club a few too many times.</p>
<p><iframe src="http://player.vimeo.com/video/38329327" width="400" height="300" frameborder="0" webkitAllowFullScreen mozallowfullscreen allowFullScreen></iframe>
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		<title>BatShiat Amy&#8217;s Baking Company Brings the Internets Drama</title>
		<link>http://www.belch.com/blog/2013/05/28/batshiat-amys-baking-company-brings-the-internets-drama/</link>
		<comments>http://www.belch.com/blog/2013/05/28/batshiat-amys-baking-company-brings-the-internets-drama/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 28 May 2013 22:07:53 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dr. Jones</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Bizarre]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Distractions]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[fail]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[You're Fired!]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[amys baking company]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.belch.com/blog/?p=14313</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Amy&#8217;s Baking Company is run by a zombie-eyed egotistical freak and her old-ass husband who may be on the run from justice. This crazy couple act like Captain Queeg when it comes to criticism on Social Media. They accuse &#8220;haters&#8221; of being Yelpers who are out to ruin their lives, yet in reality, Amy can&#8217;t&#8230;]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="https://encyclopediadramatica.se/Amy%27s_Baking_Company">Amy&#8217;s Baking Company</a> is run by a zombie-eyed egotistical freak and her old-ass husband who may be on the run from justice.  This crazy couple act like Captain Queeg when it comes to criticism on Social Media.  They accuse &#8220;haters&#8221; of being Yelpers who are out to ruin their lives, yet in reality, Amy can&#8217;t cook.  Now <a href="http://www.foxnews.com/leisure/2013/05/28/reporter-kicked-out-amy-baking-co-after-being-served-drink-with-fly/?cmpid=cmty_twitter_fn">three journalists have been kicked out of the restaurant</a> because Sammy can&#8217;t pour drinks or keep the bugs out of the restaurant (which is likely due to poor cleaning habits).  Here are three videos that shows how paranoid and crazy Amy is, along with the full episode of Kitchen Nightmares.  Hey, someone let me know if these vids get yanked by YouTube by leaving a comment, mkay?</p>
<p><iframe width="500" height="281" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/Rdi3LkGHVAw" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe></p>
<p><iframe width="500" height="281" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/RyhHSgqVWbM" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe></p>
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<p>LULZY:  Their <a href="https://twitter.com/bouzagloabc">official Twitter</a> page may have been hacked-  the hyperlink to amysbankingcompany.com in the bio section redirects to an official <a href="https://petitions.whitehouse.gov/petition/have-amy-bouzaglo-committed/q5JK3hhw">White House petition</a> to have Amy committed to a psych ward.
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		<title>Cuddle Fail:  Zookeeper An Heros Self in Tiger Cage</title>
		<link>http://www.belch.com/blog/2013/05/26/cuddle-fail-zookeeper-an-heros-self-in-tiger-cage/</link>
		<comments>http://www.belch.com/blog/2013/05/26/cuddle-fail-zookeeper-an-heros-self-in-tiger-cage/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 26 May 2013 23:41:17 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dr. Jones</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Eco-Religion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[fail]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Stupid People]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[You're Fired!]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[maul]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[tiger]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[zoo]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.belch.com/blog/?p=14292</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Sarah McClay was a zookeeper who liked to pretend to be a kittie kat, and apparently decided to end it all by climbing into the tiger cage where she worked. From the DailyMail here: Police investigating the death of a young female zoo keeper who was fatally mauled by a tiger have not ruled out&#8230;]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Sarah McClay was a zookeeper who liked to pretend to be a kittie kat, and apparently decided to end it all by climbing into the tiger cage where she worked.</p>
<p><a href="http://www.belch.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/Sarah_McClay.jpg"><img src="http://www.belch.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/Sarah_McClay.jpg" alt="Sarah_McClay" width="300" height="450" class="alignnone size-full wp-image-14293" /></a></p>
<p>From <a href="http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2331159/Did-zookeeper-enter-tigers-cage-commit-suicide-Mystery-victims-death-workers-say-reason-beasts-pen.html">the DailyMail here</a>:</p>
<blockquote><p>Police investigating the death of a young female zoo keeper who was <strong>fatally mauled by a tiger have not ruled out suicide</strong>. </p>
<p>Sarah McClay, 24 , was attacked by a Sumatran tiger at the park in Dalton-in-Furness, Cumbria, on Friday afternoon <strong>after she went into its enclosure</strong>.  Bosses at the park say she had no reason to be in the area.</p>
<p>Mr Gill said keepers follow ‘strict protocol’ and would never enter an animal enclosure without first radioing for permission, something Ms McClay, whom he described as ‘very professional’, did not do. </p>
<p>He saw her dragged the length of the enclosure and fired two shots at the animal, but it was too late.<br />
<strong>‘You do not have a hope if a tiger gets hold of you,’</strong> he said.</p></blockquote>
<p>A lot of hippie chicks are getting eaten by <a href="http://www.belch.com/blog/2013/03/07/assault-lion-gobbles-obama-voter/">lions and tigers</a> these days.  A good trend I think.
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		<title>Mama Always Told Richard Swanson Not To Play Ball In the Street</title>
		<link>http://www.belch.com/blog/2013/05/15/mama-always-told-richard-swanson-not-to-play-ball-in-the-street/</link>
		<comments>http://www.belch.com/blog/2013/05/15/mama-always-told-richard-swanson-not-to-play-ball-in-the-street/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 15 May 2013 21:32:23 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dr. Jones</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[fail]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Stupid People]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[You're Fired!]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[seattle]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[soccer]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[worst way to die]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.belch.com/blog/?p=14241</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Richard Swanson quit his job and sold his house and was going to dribble a soccer ball all the way from Seattle to Brazil as a charity stunt. He became roadkill, but at least they saved his soccer ball. From FoxNews here: A Seattle man trying to dribble a soccer ball 10,000 miles to Brazil&#8230;]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Richard Swanson quit his job and sold his house and was going to dribble a soccer ball all the way from Seattle to Brazil as a charity stunt.  He became roadkill, but at least they saved his soccer ball.</p>
<p><a href="http://www.belch.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/dickswanson.jpeg"><img src="http://www.belch.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/dickswanson-e1368653311448.jpeg" alt="dickswanson" width="419" height="363" class="alignnone size-full wp-image-14242" /></a></p>
<p>From <a href="http://www.foxnews.com/us/2013/05/15/man-dribbling-soccer-ball-to-10k-miles-to-brazil-killed-by-truck/?cmpid=cmty_twitter_fn">FoxNews here</a>:</p>
<blockquote><p>A Seattle man <strong>trying to dribble a soccer ball 10,000 miles to Brazil in time for the 2014 World Cup died Tuesday after being hit by a pickup truck on the Oregon Coast.</strong></p>
<p>Police in Lincoln City, Ore., said 42-year-old Richard Swanson was hit at about 10 a.m. <strong>while walking south along U.S. Highway 101</strong> near the city limits. He was declared dead at a hospital. The driver has not been charged.</p>
<p>Police said <strong>Palmer&#8217;s soccer ball was recovered</strong>.
</p></blockquote>
<p>Of course everyone is calling this guy an hero for bumming naps on couches and walking to Brazil with a stupid ball.  He decided to become a bum who chased his stupid ball into the path of an oncoming truck.  Doesn&#8217;t sound very heroic to me.
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		<title>Shocker:  Dalton Newhouse Fries Himself Shooting Down Electric Lines</title>
		<link>http://www.belch.com/blog/2013/05/13/shocker-dalton-newhouse-fries-himself-shooting-down-electric-lines/</link>
		<comments>http://www.belch.com/blog/2013/05/13/shocker-dalton-newhouse-fries-himself-shooting-down-electric-lines/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 14 May 2013 02:34:53 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dr. Jones</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Crime]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[fail]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Guns]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Stupid People]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[You're Fired!]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[electricity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[west virginia]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[worst way to die]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.belch.com/blog/?p=14229</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Meet Dalton Newhouse. He&#8217;s a West Virginia Trailer-dwelling gun nut and loves to shoot anything with feathers or fur. He is such a great shot that he can even shoot down high tension power lines. His idea to shoot down power lines to sell the copper worked out about as well as you could imagine&#8230;]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Meet Dalton Newhouse.  He&#8217;s a West Virginia Trailer-dwelling gun nut and loves to shoot anything with feathers or fur.  He is such a great shot that he can even shoot down high tension power lines.  His idea to shoot down power lines to sell the copper worked out about as well as you could imagine for this genius.  Dalton went to those happy hunting grounds in the sky when he picked up the power line and ate 50,000 volts.</p>
<p><a href="http://www.belch.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/daltonnewhouse.jpg"><img src="http://www.belch.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/daltonnewhouse.jpg" alt="daltonnewhouse" width="383" height="489" class="alignnone size-full wp-image-14230" /></a></p>
<p>From the <a href="http://www.saturdaygazettemail.com/News/policeblotter/201305080205">Charleston Gazette here</a>:</p>
<blockquote><p>22-year-old Dalton Newhouse of Oak Hill, and an accomplice, <strong>used a rifle to shoot down a high-tension power transmission line</strong>, police said. They planned to strip the line of its copper wiring and sell it.</p>
<p>When Newhouse picked up the wire, <strong>it killed him instantly</strong>, according to a news release. His accomplice was identified as Charles Raymond Norris, 22, of Oak Hill, who was arrested Wednesday.</p>
<p>Norris was charged with attempting to commit a felony, conspiracy to commit a felony and disruption of a public utility.</p>
<p>He was arraigned in Fayette County Magistrate Court, where he posted his own bail.</p>
<p>Appalachian Power spokesman Phil Moye said <strong>about 50 customers were without electricity for three hours</strong>. He called copper thefts a &#8220;tragedy&#8221; and urged would-be thieves to think twice.</p></blockquote>
<p>Its a real shame if this idiot left family behind but he really got what he deserved.  Man, this blog post just reminded me that I need to get batteries for my Blu-Ray remote.
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		<title>They Feed Monkeys to the Bears at the Chinese Circus</title>
		<link>http://www.belch.com/blog/2013/05/07/they-feed-monkeys-to-the-bears-at-the-chinese-circus/</link>
		<comments>http://www.belch.com/blog/2013/05/07/they-feed-monkeys-to-the-bears-at-the-chinese-circus/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 08 May 2013 00:16:37 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dr. Jones</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[China]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Eco-Religion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[fail]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[You're Fired!]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[bears]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[chinese animal cruelty]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[monkeys]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.belch.com/blog/?p=14191</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Well, to be fair, only the monkeys who don&#8217;t pedal fast enough. That first monkey got a little slow and the bear finally caught up to his lunch. And for the lulz, the other monkey handler made sure to slow-walk his monkey past the carnage, telling him that if he doesn&#8217;t pedal fast enough, he&#8217;s&#8230;]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Well, to be fair, only the monkeys who don&#8217;t pedal fast enough.  </p>
<p><iframe width="500" height="281" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/Vs_cFTV_MUc" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe></p>
<p>That first monkey got a little slow and the bear finally caught up to his lunch.  And for the lulz, the other monkey handler made sure to slow-walk his monkey past the carnage, telling him that if he doesn&#8217;t pedal fast enough, he&#8217;s on the lunch menu tomorrow.</p>
<p>The Chinese have a <a href="http://www.belch.com/blog/?s=chinese+animal+cruelty">ghastly record of animal cruelty</a>, not that PETA has the balls to do anything about it.
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