I can't believe that came from your mouth!
fail
Who Wants to Motorboat?
Oct 4th
I think the tenderloin on this pig is a little on the fatty side.
see more Poorly Dressed
Betcha didn’t know that KFC lard is mined from here.
When one butt isn’t enough, bring a backup.
This one ate the elephant god.
Gotta catch a taxi to the local McCurry.
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Yet Another Threatening Legal Email!
Oct 1st
Once again my website is being accused of all manners of legal evil-doing. This time, a band of Indians (dot not feathers) are threatening to launch DDOS attacks against my website because I once linked to a story over a year ago that details how Aiplex Software was launching distributed denial of service attacks against websites that were illegally hosting their software.
Now Jagadish of Aiplex sends me this threatening letter, accusing me of causing defamation to his company and causing his company to suffer losses due to damages and threats from hackers. Honestly, I never knew I had such awesome power by using hyperlinks to stories others have written!
From: Aiplex AntiPiracy [mailto:antipiracy@aiplex.com]
Sent: Friday, September 30, 2011 4:53 AM
To: dr.jones@belch.com
Cc: Girish; Mahesh R
Subject: RequestThis has reference to the below article on your webpage, we kindly request you to deactivate the link as the article is defaming the company’s image & its prospects. It was mis-interpreted by the news agency which was blown out of proportion by some of the pirates across the globe. And subsequently we have to face damages/threats from the pirates & undergo immense losses due to their attack on our servers/websites etc.
Although, we did declare that we are not involved in any of those activities as published in the article, we still have to face the consequences for reasons unknown.
Below is the link for your reference:
http://www.belch.com/blog/category/movies/page/3/
We kindly request you to deactivate at the earliest possible please.
Appreciate your help on this matter.
Jagadish
Support Operations
Aiplex Software Pvt. Ltd.
No. 2943/E, 1st floor, Opp Maruthi Mandir,
Service Road, Vijayanagar,
Bangalore – 560 040
Ph : +91 80 23305411 / 12 / 13
Email : antipiracy@aiplex.com
Website : www.aiplex.com
To which I responded:
Please stop DDoSing me you evil bastards!
Now I get the following response from a lawyer for aiplex, who I’m sure has belch.com in the sites of his nefarious DDoS botnet:
I did clarify that we are not into such unscrupulous activity pls understand that it was a mis-interpretation by a news agency.
Anyways, it is your prerogative to keep it active or disable the link.
U have a nice weekend Patrick.
Best,
Girish Kumar N
Managing Director
Aiplex Software Pvt. Ltd.
Bangalore
Ph : +91 80 23305411 / 12 / 13
Mb : +91 98451 28280
Email : girish@aiplex.com
Website : www.aiplex.comConfidentiality & Non-Disclosure Warning: This message is intended for the exclusive use of the person or entity to which it is addressed. It may contain information that is confidential/privileged, and must be treated as such. If you are not the intended recipient, you are hereby notified that any dissemination, distribution, copying or making a decision in reliance of its content is strictly prohibited. If you have received this message by error, please, destroy the message and kindly notify us immediately. Inappropriate/unauthorized use of the information shall be dealt with the applicable confidentiality and non-disclosure laws. Please note that while we scan all e-mails for viruses we cannot guarantee that any e-mail is virus-free and accept no liability for any damage caused by any virus transmitted by this email.
I snort loudly, by the way, for every lawyer who sends out a clear text email with a retarded non disclosure warning appended to it. I can disclose anything I want, and I dare anyone to find a law that says posting something like this is a breach of any confidentiality laws.
Who is the Girish Kumar who is spending so much time emailing me? This guy pictured here. The story from theAge in Australia describes further how Girish Kumar was bragging about launching DoS attacks against websites that link to movie downloads.
Anyways, I finally responded:
Wait a minute. Are you accusing me of defamation or not? Am I causing you to suffer damages and threats because of hackers or not? Your email seemed to imply this, and my own legal team will need clarification. And of course, I expect if I don’t comply you will immediately DDOS me, right? That’s what you guys do, right? Send threats and then strong arm/abuse people to bow to your every demand to remove links? So even if you talk about piracy its as bad as committing piracy because now you are going to wreak havoc on my internets page because I linked to a story about you guys running huge DDOS operations against pirates?
Lets see what they say next! In the mean time, Girish has joined other legal scholars who have decided to send me threatening emails. At least this one’s not a clown.
(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Africa is Hell on Earth: Kenyan Firefighters are teh Fail
Sep 23rd
Meanwhile, back in Obama’s hometown of “Kiddie Kiddie Kiambu Kenya,” his kinsmen struggle to put out a three story apartment fire. The first firetruck didn’t have enough water. The second firetruck pumped a little water and then the firetruck just burst into flames.
Dang, I can’t help but hear the theme to the Three Stooges while I watch this.
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Italy is Lynching Their Scientists
Sep 20th
I think Italy is descending into complete leftist moonbattery. The surest sign is the government is allowing citizens to put scientists on trial for failing to predict natural disasters. In this case, several geologists are on trial for manslaughter for failing to predict an earthquake- something science will likely never be able to do- in a country that is very seismically active and has active volcanoes.
From Fox here:
A group of Italian scientists went on trial Tuesday for failing to predict an earthquake that killed more than 300 people in central Italy in 2009 despite signs of increased seismic activity in the area.
The seven defendants — six scientists and one government official — are accused of manslaughter in a case that some see as an unfair indictment of science.Prosecutors say residents around the city of L’Aquila in the mountainous Abruzzo region should have been warned to flee their homes in the days before the quake.
“We simply want justice,” L’Aquila prosecutor Alfredo Rossini said. The injured parties are asking for €50 million ($68 million) in damages.
The defendants were members of a panel that had met six days before the earthquake to assess risks after hundreds of tremors had shaken the medieval university city. At that meeting, a committee analyzed data from the low-magnitude tremors and determined that the activity was not a prelude to a major earthquake.
That does it for Italian science. There will never again be a single person that will go into the field of geology in Italy if this trial goes forward, and especially if there is a conviction. If their life is on the line for failing to predict acts of God, would it be worth it to enter the field?
Italy is famous for having its earthquakes and volcanoes wipe out thousands of people! Vesuvius, Etna, Stromboli and even Vulcano are all active volcanoes in the region. But thanks to a bunch of leftists, scientists in Italy will now be “Going Galt.”
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Chaz Bono on the Wrong Show
Sep 20th
The new ABC TV show “Dancing with the Stars’ Fat Sexually Confused Middle-Aged Kids” debuted last night and Chaz Bono showed up and made sure she didn’t shave. It took 40 years to grow that neckbeard she’s sporting, and she’ll be damned if she is going to conform to television standards and take a razor to it. Also, she apparently gets schweaty between meals and after dancing practice. TMZ snapped this shot of her topless- which man or woman, this is a gross public display.
After this show Chaz will become the reality TV whore that she always wanted to be. Next she will go on the Biggest Loser to shed some of that ugly fat, then go on a VH-1 reality dating show, and finally, make an appearance on Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew. How can this trainwreck of a human being not have a serious drinking and drug problem?
(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Where My EBT Card At?
Sep 19th
Drudge tweeted out this Youtube up-and-coming hit. I think the man in this video stole his sample tracks from a more successful musician, along with his sistah’s EBT foodstamp card. Whatever happened to those awesome monopoly money foodstamps you had to rip out of the booklet to allow others to properly show scorn for your non-working asses?
And I hate to correct anyone’s ebonics, but I think the proper phrase is “Where my EBT card be?” And this little card can be a source of stress in the lives of single moms and their playa boyfriends, who like to playfight and scare the bejeezus out of little kids.
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Ah, the US Day of Rage!
Sep 17th
Today was the birthday of the US Constitution, so of course a bunch of leftists decided to celebrate that by “taking back democracy” by camping out in Wall Street in lower Manhattan to mimic the Arab Spring protests. The organizers called it the US Day of Rage.
A bunch of conservatives flocked to Twitter to point and laugh at the juvenile antics of the protesters. I tossed in a bunch of snark myself thanks to Jess and her stream of discontent:
Between the Day of Rage and the AttackWatch silliness, the left has provided quite a few laughs for me this week.
(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...How Solyndra Got Its Loan from the Govt
Sep 17th
The department of energy goes through quite a few submission videos to pick who they are going to throw cash at. One VHS tape got their attention:
(1 votes, average: 6.00 out of 6) Loading ...Uh Oh. Hitler’s AttackWatch.Com Site is a Laughing Stock
Sep 16th
The web design team of AttackWatch.Com have to break the saddening news to the Führer.
(1 votes, average: 6.00 out of 6) Loading ...Oh Solyndra! Don’t You Cry For Me- I Come From California With Solar Panels on My Knee
Sep 16th
If you have a bad case of photo-voltaic patella, (solar panel knee) then Obamacare is just the cure you need. Here is John Stewart’s masterful take on the Solyndra scandal. It had me rolling on the floor.
(1 votes, average: 6.00 out of 6) Loading ...Gardisil and Bachmann: Tea Party Face Palm
Sep 13th
Boy did Michelle Bachmann ever say something stupid: She claims that the Gardisil vaccination caused the daughter of a weepy constituent to catch “a case of the severe retards.”
She said:
There’s a woman who came up crying to me tonight after the debate. She said her daughter was given that vaccine. She told me her daughter suffered mental retardation as a result of that vaccine.
As Ed Morrissey at HotAir says:
Huh? “Mental retardation” typically takes place in a pre- or neo-natal event. Autism becomes apparent in the first couple of years of life — and primarily affects boys. Gardasil vaccinations take place among girls between 9-12 years of age. Even assuming that this anecdote is arguably true, it wouldn’t be either “mental retardation” or autism, but brain damage.
The “mental retardation” argument is a rehash of the thoroughly discredited notion that vaccines containing thimerasol caused a rapid increase in diagnosed autism cases. That started with a badly-botched report in Lancet that allowed one researcher to manipulate a ridiculously small sample of twelve cases in order to reach far-sweeping conclusions about thimerasol. That preservative hasn’t been included in vaccines for years, at least not in the US, and the rate of autism diagnoses remain unchanged.
She should have just kept on criticizing Barack Obama and quit trying to snipe at Perry and others on the Republican ticket. Because of this statement, I have serious doubts about her ability to read and understand scientific information. And if she were to win the presidency and take a stand against the Global Warming scientific fraud, the left would just call her anti-science and refer to this incident as proof.
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Idiot Muslims With Free Healthcare Would Rather Sit on Railroad Tracks
Sep 10th
Meet Abdul Rachman. He, like most of his Muslim countrymen, are poorly educated rubes who can barely understand modern technology, much less biology. He claims to be achy so he treats his arthritis by laying down on the railroad tracks near his home because “imaginary electricity” from a passing train makes him feel better.
From the LATimes here:
Each afternoon, Abdul Rachman indulges in his favorite way to reduce the stresses of the working world: He sits on the railway tracks not far from home.
Rachman, a 32-year-old security guard, has suffered from rheumatism and fatigue. “People can say what they want. I do it because I want to be cured.”
Rachman is among scores of advocates of railway “electric therapy,” a treatment some Indonesians believe cures such ailments as strokes, asthma, high blood pressure and rheumatism, not to mention a hard day at the office.
Believers say that as trains pass on adjacent racks, they administer a string of low-voltage electric shocks that jolt away whatever ails people. So far, at least, officials say, no one has been struck by trains.
In the world’s most-populous Muslim-majority nation, many practice a form of Islam that is mixed with superstition and traditional beliefs, including voodoo-like treatments to ward off spells and illnesses.
Although everyone is entitled to free healthcare, many get fed up with the bureaucracy of obtaining the services. Rachman, who earns $120 a month, is one of them.
“You have to pay to go to the doctor, but here it’s free,” he said. “You can come whenever you want, morning or afternoon, and you can stay all day.”
Smart bunch of people over there. And Obama, who came from Indonesia, wants to model our healthcare after what he saw in his homeland. But I think getting Muslims to sit on railroad tracks is an outstanding idea, and one that I will gladly encourage.
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Never Good When the Hot Beef Injection Burns
Sep 9th
In what is the most hilarious way to die I’ve seen so far this year, Janet Hardt, an aging woman who was likely addicted to cosmetic surgery, injected beef fat into her face, went to the hospital because it burned, and she died.
From WLS here:
A Homewood woman died Thursday after apparently injecting heated beef fat into her face at her south suburban home.
Janet Hardt, 63 , was pronounced dead at 6:25 p.m.
A source said shortly before Hardt died she injected heated beef fat into her face around her mouth and chin, which she had done before on several occasions.
Hardt went to the hospital after complaining that her face became singed and felt like it was burning.
She has previously undergone multiple facial surgeries.
What is up with women shooting up fat? I previously wrote about another woman who used to inject veggie oil into stupid women. Also, Kanye West’s Mom died having the fat sucked out of her.
(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Egads: Michelle Obama Does Double Dutch on White House Lawn
Sep 5th
The ever-classless, overweight, and poorly dressed Michelle Obama jumped double-dutch jumprope on the White House lawn in what is sure to be a new low for an American First Lady. Even Betty Ford, who was draining the dregs of cough syrup from the White House medicine cabinets, did that indoors and away from the camera.
First Lady Michelle Obama Worldwide Day of Play Spot from Jessica Wilson on Vimeo.
What wasn’t caught on camera was a white house engineer opening up a south lawn fire hydrant so Michelle and the kids could strip down to their underwear and play in the spray. But even that was shortly lived when a firetruck siren went off a few blocks away. Michelle screamed “Its the Po-Po, run everybody!” and the party abruptly came to an end.
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Kid Executes Cross-Dressing Poof in Class in Front of Witnesses and Jury Can’t Convict
Sep 1st
Ah Los Angeles. The city where liberalism is so rampant, that when a jury is handed an open and shut case of premeditated murder against a crossdressing child, the jury can’t decide to convict. And now we have the hilarious new defense for execution style murder known as “gay panic.”
From the LATimes here:
A jury has been unable to reach a verdict in the murder trial of Brandon McInerney, the 17-year-old accused of shooting a gay classmate to death in 2008.
The jury began deliberating Friday, weighing eight weeks of testimony in a trial that included nearly 100 witnesses. Many of those testifying were students and teachers at E.O. Green Junior High School in Oxnard who saw tensions on campus rising after 15-year-old Larry King began coming to school dressed in makeup and girl’s boots.
McInerney, then 14, shot King twice in the back of the head in a school computer lab on Feb. 12, 2008. The prosecution says it was a calculated murder carried out in part because McInerney was exploring white supremacist ideology and didn’t like homosexuals.
Defense attorneys painted a different picture, that of a bright but abused 14-year-old who snapped after being sexually harassed by King.
In liberal dogma, its just fine that a young boy suddenly wants to wear makeup and start propositioning other boys for sexual intercourse, and teachers won’t step in and stop such behavior, much less make the child get counselling to find out what adults have been molesting him to prompt such acting out. And when another child, shaken by the feelings provoked by the behavior, puts an end to the situation, liberals have the gall to act shocked.
The jury may be hung, but there will probably be a retrial. In the mean time, don’t shed any tears for Larry King. He got to go to gay heaven to be with Matthew Shephard who died on the fence for all gay sins.
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MLK Memorial Was Made in China- No Qualified Black Sculptors
Aug 30th
Check out Ol’ MLK in the imported granite sculpture below, with his “Keepin’ It Real” pose. He looks like he just won a rap battle and is getting to drop the microphone. According to the Chinese manufacturer, who specialized in sculpting Chairman Mao Tse Tung, there are no such things as black sculptors who had the mad skills to chip away some white rock to reveal the majesty of Dr. King.
From the National Post here:
The chunks of granite used to sculpt the new Martin Luther King Jr. memorial had to be imported from Changsha. And the whole thing was designed by a Chinese architect, Lei Yixin — previously noted for statues of that great champion of human rights, Mao Zedong.
Chinese workers, too, were brought in to put it all together as the U.S. lacked people capable of doing this.
Yup, made in China strikes again and at the heart of the U.S. capital. The new sculpture has been installed in between monuments to Jefferson and Lincoln in Washington.
Some observers have discerned an Asiatic cast to Dr. King’s features. Others find his stance — stern, with folded arms — reminiscent of another Communist icon, Joe Stalin.
Surely, having a black sculptor of a black civil rights icon — working on ground once toiled by black slaves, on the National Mall, designed and surveyed with the help of a black mathematician and astronomer Benjamin Banneker — would have added to the King memorial’s symbolic power.
So, yes, it stings when, centuries later, creators of the King memorial say they couldn’t find a qualified black sculptor.
The Chinese think that all blacks play football or rap. They don’t sculpt. And that white liberals in this country think its just peachy that the Chinese are designing our National monuments and not including American artists or architects, black or white, in the creation of these memorials, is laughably sad.
(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Son of Racist Senator Says Civil Rights Bigots Were No More Harmful than Global Warming Skeptics
Aug 29th
Al Gore has opened his mouth again, and as usual, he is calling people racists, and equating bigotry, where people turned dogs and firehouses on black people to telling a friend that “Nah, that Global Warming stuff is probably bullshit.”
Al Gore’s Dad attempted to block the implementation of the Civil Rights Act of 1964. Democrats founded the racist domestic terror organization of the KKK to scare blacks away from voting Republican, and that has worked pretty well. Now Al Gore is saying that if you tell someone that Global Warming is BS then you have just turned a firehose on a black baby or something.
From the DailyCaller here:
One day climate change skeptics will be seen in the same negative light as racists, or so says former Vice President Al Gore.
“I remember, again going back to my early years in the South, when the Civil Rights revolution was unfolding, there were two things that really made an impression on me,” Gore said. “My generation watched Bull Connor turning the hose on civil rights demonstrators (Bull Connor was a Democrat) and we went, ‘Whoa! How gross and evil is that?’ My generation asked old people, ‘Explain to me again why it is okay to discriminate against people because their skin color is different?’ And when they couldn’t really answer that question with integrity, the change really started.”
The former vice president recalled how society succeeded in marginalizing racists and said climate change skeptics must be defeated in the same manner.
The same scientists that said we were all doomed this past weekend because of a giant Thunderstorm are the same dolts that are screaming about Global Warming. Think about the hysteria that so many people felt about Hurricane Irene. Fear was ginned up and fanned to the point that many Americans denuded the grocery stores of bottled water and other goods. I have seen thunderstorms roll through my neighborhood any summer evening with more power than Irene possessed. So Al Gore can kiss my ass if he expects me to blindly believe anything that anyone in the field of meteorology says- they deal with actual live data and get it wrong! Much less would I believe scientists in leftist universities who push the proposal that we eliminate energy to combat a problem that doesn’t seem to exist- using data that they have to make up because our hard scientific data can only be measured in the past 120 years accurately. And the Global Warming Scientists have been caught faking their data in the past.
No, I’m a skeptic, and proud of it.
Al Gore’s Dad applauded Bull Connor’s actions, and Al Gore probably tells racist jokes while he snorts coke off the asses of hotel massage therapists.
(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Irene is a Complete Joke- Streakers on the Weather Channel
Aug 27th
Irene can’t even come up with enough gusty weather to keep streakers at the Virginia Beach Oceanfront from flashing the idiot newsmen who are broadcasting live from the storm. And if you have an aversion to wiener, don’t hit the play button.
Thanks to Bill Burr!
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Steve Jobs Has the iCancer
Aug 26th
Someone forgot to plug Steve Jobs into the wall outlet.
The photo above was from TMZ taken two days after the Apple CEO resigned.
So maybe cellphones really do cause brain cancer?
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