I can't believe that came from your mouth!
Archive for January, 2011
Fantastic Futuristic Film- Charlie Chaplin on the Moon
Jan 14th
I saw this video at Buzzfeed and it took my breath away. The film maker, Scottish art director Ben Craig, has a wonderful taste and feel of a modern interpretation of life in space, not to mention a way to really move the viewer with sound and theme. You gotta watch.
MODERN TIMES from BC2010 on Vimeo.
Also, one of my favorite Chaplin bits- the table ballet-
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Sword from the Queen Anne’s Revenge
Jan 13th
Archaeological work continues on the remains of the Queen Anne’s Revenge, the pirate ship of the infamous Blackbeard. A sword has been pieced back together from remnants left behind after the pirates abandoned the ship. I seriously doubt this piece would have belonged to Blackbeard, who was killed prior to the ship running aground in 1718.
From NatGeo here:
(the sword) was found amid the North Carolina wreck of the Queen Anne’s Revenge, the flagship of the infamous 18th-century pirate.
Since 1997, archaeologists have been excavating the Queen Anne’s Revenge. The sword hilt—found in pieces but reassembled for this picture—is among their latest finds and was revealed to the public this month.
After running aground on a sandbar in 1718 near the town of Beaufort, the ship was abandoned but likely remained intact and partly above water for as long as a year before collapsing and disintegrating.
“In any event,” he said, “the pirates would have had ample opportunity to take anything that they thought valuable.” The newfound hilt may have been left behind because it was unwanted, or it may have been inaccessible.
Blackbeard’s brief career as a pirate lasted only about two years, but during that time he became one of history’s most feared outlaws. Operating in the West Indies and off the coast of colonial America, he struck terror into the hearts of commercial ships’ captains and once held the entire city of Charleston, South Carolina, hostage.
This one man, Ed Teach, aka Blackbeard, once blockaded an entire port city with just the help of his merry band of cutthroats.
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Most Awesome Hero Teamup Ever
Jan 13th
All the greats together at last!
For those that don’t recognize them, from left to right we have:
Madmartigan on the sled. The Rocketeer, Jean Luc Picard with a tommy gun, Zorro, Gambit, the Gray Ghost, Snake Eyes jumping over Henry Rollins, Wolverine riding shotgun with Indiana Jones, and finally, Einstein holding a two-handed great sword.
From SeanGordonMurphy
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Putting Your Daughter on the Pole Early
Jan 13th
Earns you a nice jump in line on the way to hell.
This is why some women are so screwed up in our society. Moms, stop sexualizing your daughters. Its disgusting and wrong. One comment on the YouTube pretty much sums up my feelings on the matter:
Besides, you gotta get these kids the right shoes.
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The Fall of Socialism- Hillary Fell Down
Jan 12th
This is a video of Hillary climbing aboard the State Department aircraft and falling on her face when she reaches the top of the steps. A couple of personal observations: she is walking very gingerly up the steps. She either is arthritic or drunk. Many commenters on the YouTube think its the latter.
You know, it is quite common for dogs to get arthritis in their hips in later years of life. Some YouTube comments, which reflect the anger of the Americans at the left for blaming Palin for the Arizona shootings:
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Newest Spa Treatment- Steamed Vagina
Jan 12th
My buddy and frequent commenter Robb forwarded a business idea to me- we should corner the market in the region for being the providers of the vaginal steam bath therapy now being offered, where else, but in Southern California.
From the latimes here:
Pungent steam rises from a boiling pot of a mugwort tea blended with wormwood and a variety of other herbs. Above it sits a nude woman on an open-seated stool, partaking in a centuries-old Korean remedy that is gaining a toehold in the West.
Vaginal steam baths, called chai-yok, are said to reduce stress, fight infections, clear hemorrhoids, regulate menstrual cycles and aid infertility, among many other health benefits. In Korea, many women steam regularly after their monthly periods.
At Daengki Spa in Koreatown, a 45-minute V-Herbal Therapy treatment can be had for $20 a squat.
So for twenty bucks you can git a “clit shvitz.” You can get a “steamed bearded clam.” Or a “boiled ham sammich.” A “Blanched Bush.” A “Vaporized vajajay.” A “Poached Pootang.” Did I miss one?
This new treatment will go great with the fishy feet treatment.
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Jared Lee Loughner is Crazy Just Like:
Jan 11th
Jared Lee Loughner
Smeagol
Voldemort
Bald Britney
Thanks to Buzzfeed for the reminders of just why this deranged killer reminded me so much of the crazy. And kudos to me for working in two day’s worth of Smeagol references!
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Awesome Termination Doc
Jan 11th
Back when I worked in the Pizza industry I did a quick tour through Domino’s. This was back in the days of the 30 minute guarantee. Hated just about every day on the job there. This is what I wish had been written on my termination sheet.
Sounds too good to be true and probably is. But if you are on your way out, make a grand exit.
(1 votes, average: 6.00 out of 6) Loading ...Movie Sci-Fi Rocks and Minerals
Jan 11th
Rocks and Minerals, originally uploaded by Eduardo San Gil.
Pretty cool tee shirt available from Jinx here. An outstanding use of three colors to show a story, but seriously, wouldn’t adamantium be about where mithrilium would be? Or at least make it swap places with ectoplasm, which technically, wouldn’t be a mineral at all, but a cross dimensional spritually organic goo which was, if memory serves, found at subway level in New York circa 1989.
(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Joker Holding Elmo Who Impersonates Smeagol
Jan 10th
Its an awesome impression of the wretched Smeagol, but its is so creepy coming from the mouth of the red puppet operated by the criminal mastermind of the Joker.
Awesome link by FMLFTW
(1 votes, average: 6.00 out of 6) Loading ...Bubba Watson Hits a “C-2″ Golden Tee Style for an Eagle
Jan 10th
In Golden Tee you can take advantage of hooking and slicing to get a great position or to drive the green. Bubba Watson demonstrates this quite well and eagles the 18th.
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Uncle Teaches his Wannabe Gangsta Nephew a Lesson
Jan 10th
The language in this video is salty, and I’m pretty sure at least one black person is shown being whipped. So be forewarned, this is NSFW. But when you post on Facebook that you are into some gangsta stuff like hard core rap and shooting people, your Uncle, who you foolishly friended, might get pissed.
When I saw this I was all like:
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What did Jared Loughner and Pentagon Shooter Have in Common?
Jan 9th
Remember the nutjob J Patrick Bedell, who back in March of 2010, drove his POS green Toyota cross country to attempt to shoot his way into the Pentagon? What did he have in common with the Arizona shooter Jared Loughner? Both were addicted to marijuana.
Forget that both were whackjobs and leftists- Bedell was a firm believer in a 9/11 coverup and Loughner thought that the government was conspiring to keep him out of school. But both abused marijuana for many years and family and friends knew about the pot use. Should people prone to paranoia and schizophrenia smoke so much dope? Absolutely not.
I wrote back in 2007 that some doctors performing brain research discontinued their work because they thought giving THC to some mental health patients would be so completely unethical because the effects were so pronounced.
In another study scientists found that marijuana worsens psychotic symptoms of schizophrenics.
While D’Souza had intended to study marijuana’s impact on schizophrenics in more patients, the study was stopped prematurely because the impact was so pronounced that it would have been unethical to test it on more people with schizophrenia.
In other words, marijuana is debilitating to some people and will trigger psychotic events. A lot of people are dead due to stoners and their paranoia, but you won’t hear any liberals talk about that.
Here is a news post about the study.
(3 votes, average: 1.00 out of 6) Loading ...What Do Security Researchers Do?
Jan 9th
If you aren’t too sure, then watch this. They have a job that seems to pay next to nothing, and they refuse to work for a real company. They claim they are professionals, but if they don’t get paid, isn’t that a dubious claim? Anyways, I LOLed at this.
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Leftist Whackjob Guns Down Democrats at Safeway
Jan 9th
Jared Lee Loughner attacked and killed several people, including a judge and attempted to murder a Democratic Congresswoman, Arizona Rep. Gabrielle Giffords.
And Loughner is a leftist loon who believed in mind control, the 2012 apocalypse, and was ejected from school by cops for incoherent babbling, which he obviously blamed on the school being unconstitutional or something.
From his YouTube screeds here:
If the police remove you from the educational facility for talking then removing you from the educational facility for talking is unconstitutional in the United States. The police remove you from the educational facility for talking. Thus, removing you from the educational facility for talking is unconstitutional in the United States. This situation is fraud because the police are unconstitutional!
Every police officer in the United States as of now is unconstitutionally working. Pima Community College police are police in the United States. Therefore, Pima Community College police are unconstitutionally working. The police are unconstitutionally working!
His YouTube videos are full of these types of self-affirming circular logic statements- and none of them make any sense to me.
Matt Drudge earlier tonight linked to a woman’s Twitter feed who described him as a leftist loon who was a total pothead. Here is a copy of her tweets:
While I am usually the first to point blame at leftists who hypocritically perform violent acts against their own kind, I must say that this is not a political attack. The actions of Jared Lee Loughner are typical of schizophrenic paranoids, and his actions will likely land him, if not in prison for life, then in a mental ward for a very long time.
He took a semi-automatic weapon to a grocery store with the intent to kill as many people as he could and succeeded in killing at least 6. He tried to join the Army but:
A senior military official told ABC News Loughner attempted to join the Army but “never made it past the urinalysis.”
Would I support drug testing as a condition of owning firearms? Um, yep.
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Meg Ryan and John Cougar? Zombie Apocalypse is Here!
Jan 9th
I was in the checkout line at my Grocery Store today and was alerted to the important fact that John cougar is both still alive and currently sticking it to Meg Ryan, who used to be America’s Sweetheart.
Meg was to busy making crappy movies to have a baby on her own so she snagged a Chinese baby with a net on loan to her by Bradgelina.
When I saw that photo I got out of line, and at first pitied the town who lost their drive in movie screen when John’s fivehead (its a forehead when it can fit under a hat) left town, and then stocked up on Twinkies, out of fear that when the obvious Zombie Apocalypse arrives, there will not be enough spongecake to attract a sharpshooter like Tallahassee.
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US to Introduce One Stop Identity Spying While Twitter Turns Over Wikileaks Userbase
Jan 9th
Wikileaks revealed today that Twitter has been issued a subpoena to turn over logfiles showing access to the Wikileaks Twitter accounts of julian Assange, Bradley manning and key players in the Wikileaks secrets disclosures.
Gays in the Military have given us Security Breaches
From the AP here:
Investigative documents in the WikiLeaks pointed to the Obama administration’s determination to assemble a criminal case no matter how long it takes and how far afield authorities have to go.
Tthe U.S. attorney’s office in Alexandria, Va., demand details about the accounts of WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange and Pfc. Bradley Manning.
The others whose Twitter accounts are targeted in the prosecutors’ demand are Birgitta Jonsdottir, an Icelandic parliamentarian and one-time WikiLeaks collaborator; Dutch hacker Rop Gonggrijp; and U.S. programmer Jacob Appelbaum. Gonggrijp and Appelbaum have worked with WikiLeaks in the past.
I’m very surprised that the Federal Government didn’t simply subpoena the logs of everyone who ever followed the Wikileaks Twitter account. If they had that information they could simply cross check all the names of users who work with classified information and see if they had a hand in leaking secrets.
At the same time this story broke, Howard Schmidt, the Cyber Security Czar said that the Commerce Department, under the direction of Obama, was gearing up to enforce an Internet Identity System. If you shop online, the feds are supposedly too worried about you having to memorize passwords, so they want to back your credentials to ensure you don’t get ripped off or identity theived. They were gonna have the NSA monitor your identity, but that might have been too scary. So the Commerce department will do it instead.
From InfosecIsland here:
The Commerce Department will ultimately hold dominion over the creation and maintenance of trusted cyber identities, according to White House Cybersecurity Coordinator Howard Schmidt.
Schmidt called the Commerce Department “the absolute perfect spot in the U.S. government” to concentrate efforts to produce a secure “identity ecosystem” for ensuring secure online transactions and reduce fraud.
As part of the Obama administration’s efforts, a second draft of the National Strategy for Trusted Identities in Cyberspace is due in a matter of months.
Commerce Secretary Gary Locke described the initiative while speaking at the the Stanford Institute for Economic Policy Research:
“We are not talking about a government-controlled system. What we are talking about is enhancing online security and privacy, and reducing and perhaps even eliminating the need to memorize a dozen passwords, through creation and use of more trusted digital identities.”
Are we really supposed to believe that the Feds want to make online shopping easier for us? On the one hand they grab the identities of everyone related to a Twitter feed, and in the next they want us to be branded with an identity to make it flawlessly easy for them to track our every online move? The article source goes on to say that users will still be able to have anonymity, but I don’t think so. Tax breaks and other incentives will force online shops to use ONLY federal identities, making it all the easier for the Feds to track every move you make in cyberspace.
Yes, identities need to be strengthened. But if the Federal Government can easily find everyone who checked out the twitter feed of Assange, why allow them to monitor your online activities so easily?
(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Minion Says What?
Jan 7th
My kid is watching despicable me over and over again and this is a scene that causes me to howl in laughter every time I see it.
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Elizabeth Edwards’ Corpse Finally Cools. John Announces Engagement
Jan 7th
The model democrat John Edwards waited until his wife’s corpse cooled to room temperature and has rushed into the Valentines Day season early with his romantic announcement that he and Rielle Hunter, the skanky mother of John’s love child can be married.
Ain’t love grand? And Rielle Hunter is insisting that John’s remaining kids call her Mom. The lulz here from Politico:
Former presidential candidate John Edwards is engaged to longtime mistress Rielle Hunter, according to a report.
The Jan. 17 issue of the National Enquirers says that the ex-North Carolina senator asked the mother of his lovechild to marry him only three weeks after burying his wife, Elizabeth, who died from cancer. The couple is said to be tying the knot some time this summer.
“Heartless cheater defies Elizabeth’s dying wish,” screams a line on the supermarket tab’s cover. Below that: “Rielle tells his two young kids: ‘CALL ME MOMMY!”
“I do know that I love him and that love is till death do us part, and probably beyond,” Hunter recently told GQ magazine. “We have a child together, so at the very least we will be co-parents together.”
Beyond?? A liberal husband stealer believes in life after death and seriously thinks she would both go to heaven and get dibs on John over Elizabeth? Presuming of course that John avoids hell somehow, which according to the odds in Vegas, his soul is firmly in the win column for Old Scratch.
(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Flash Mobs Kill?
Jan 7th
That’s what this fast talking presentation is about- the dangers of a flash mob. While this is just a presentation, and a great one at that, it does present some real weaknesses in this interconnected world- the lack of preparedness by police, weaknesses in cellular digital networks and whether or not something like this would be covered by the press.
Thanks to Rob at Red-Alerts for the video.
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