I can't believe that came from your mouth!
Archive for June, 2010
Michael Vick Still Associating With Criminals Who Catch Bullets in the Leg
Jun 30th
Michael Vick, who just started playing football again after spending a few years in prison for viciously abusing animals in a dog fighting ring, was celebrating his birthday in Virginia Beach, Virginia. One of his co-conspirators in the dog fighting ring was shot in the leg outside of the restaurant. Vick and his crew said they weren’t at the scene at the time of the shooting, but the videotape says otherwise.
From the WaPo here:
Video contradicts Vick’s timeline
Security camera video taken at the Virginia Beach restaurant that hosted Michael Vick’s birthday party shows a different version of events prior to Friday’s shooting than the one provided by the Eagles QB’s attorney.
The paper quotes Allen Fabijan, spokesman for the Guadalajara restaurant, saying Vick “and his entourage” drove off from in front of the restaurant at 2:07 a.m. Three minutes later, shots rang out from that direction, Fabijan said. Vick’s former co-defendant in a dogfighting case, Quanis Phillips, was shot in the leg.
“You can see everybody duck at 2:10,” Fabijan said of bystanders on the video. “I’m not saying that Michael Vick did the shooting. But he did not leave (long) before” .
The surveillance video has been turned over to police.
Vick is supposed to have no contact with any known felons as part of his reinstatement to the NFL. Seeing as how he still hangs around with members of his dog fighting ring, can the NFL just go ahead and fire him?
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KaChing!! Tiger Woods Pays Out in Divorce for 3/4 Billion Dollars
Jun 30th
750 Million dollars is going to Elin Woods because Tiger was a whorebag. Government social programs often don’t cost as much as this.
From theSun here:
TIGER WOODS is banned from letting girlfriends near his kids in a divorce deal netting his ex a record £500million.
In return, former wife ELIN NORDEGREN, 30, gets the biggest payout ever seen in a celebrity divorce.
Swedish ex model Elin ended up with double the sum she originally sought, after her lawyers proved Tiger, 34, was worth much more than the $1billion (£660m) she thought.
“The price of the huge sum is her silence: no interviews, tell-all books, or TV appearances about this for the rest of her life – even if Tiger dies first – or she’ll lose the lot.”
I wonder how Elin is planning on keeping her kids away from things like the Internet and television if she is so worried about protecting them from exposure to Tiger’s mistresses. Oh well, three quarters of a billion dollars will buy lots of therapy, lots of presents and most of Oklahoma.
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BelchSpeak Now With More Facebook Bannage!
Jun 30th
As of last night BelchSpeak is no longer on Facebook due to a terms of service violation most likely related to me exercising my freedom of speech in criticizing muslims, wiccans, teachers, hackers, democrats, hoarders, and lots of other stupid people too long to list here.
So for those of you who had followed me on Facebook, you will need to learn how to operate an RSS feed or follow me on Twitter. Now I just have to explain to my wife how I managed to get her banned too! Good thing I’m out of town right now….
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Epic Why Guy: Aging Hippy Has Shopper’s Rage
Jun 29th
A fat hippy is outraged that the Eaton Center mall shut down because so many of his pals were running around smashing windows and burning police cars during the G20 protests. So he asks a simple question. Over and over. Its lulzy.
I think he is angry because he is missing out on that awesome sale at Otis Spunkmeyer’s cookies. And if he got to the cookie counter and they were out of peanut butter brownies, he would shout at the clerk “Why, Why don’t you have any of my cookies!!?”
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Wiccan Hoarder Kept 100 Dead Cats in Broken Freezer, Blessed Be!
Jun 29th
A disgusting Wisconsin woman, Gabriella Bernabei, and her degenerate boyfriend Robert Grassi, who wouldn’t marry her, had their kids taken into state custody because of their hoarding. And like most hoarders, there were about two dozen sick-ass cats rolling around in the home in their own feces. As a bonus, Bernabei kept about 100 or more rotted cat carcasses in a broken down freezer in her crammed garage. She claims the freezer was working (like that’s an excuse for stockpiling cat corpses) and she is being persecuted because she and her boyfriend are Wiccans.
From WEAU here:
Gabriella Bernabei says she kept the cats in the freezer because she hadn’t found the right time to bury the cats. She says she’s Wiccan and in her religion you honor the animal by returning it to Mother Earth. She believes it’s her Wiccan beliefs that got her in trouble with the law. But, the sheriff says she and her boyfriend were mistreating their cats.
It was in an un-working freezer in the back of a garage that the Jackson County Sheriff’s Department says it found 100 dead cats accumulated over a year and half. The woman who put them there says that number is closer to 50 and says the freezer was working. Bernabei says she brought some of the cats with her from Illinois when her family moved to Jackson County. She says others weren’t necessarily theirs, but every animal deserves a burial and she was just waiting for the right moment to return them to the earth.
I guess dead cats have some sort of magical properties to Wiccans. And its no shock to me that she cared more about her cats than her children. They should have burned the cats and the witches at the stake just like the good old days.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Know Who Else is on Team Jacob?
Jun 29th
The AP reports that an terrorist attack was cancelled by Al-Queda in order to spare the life of Stephanie Meyers. Wow.
Al-Qaeda Calls Off Attack On Nation’s Capitol To Spare Life Of ‘Twilight’ Author
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...The Man that Inspired Jamie Foxx in “The Soloist”
Jun 28th
Who knew that the liberal bastion of compassion, San Francisco, California, would be hiding all of its musical talent in a homeless man sitting among the garbage at Fisherman’s wharf?
He’ll play for a dollar. He’ll stop playing for fifty.
Is it his music or his rotting teeth that attracts those seagulls?
Can’t see his sign, but it says “will butcher Bach for crack.”
Think his playing is awesome? You should hear him sing!
The World Cup should replace vuvuzelas with this.
Those garbage bags are filled with sheet music.
He wore the black off the fingerboard. You’d think he’d be better after all that practice.
Is he more talented at homelessness or with music?
Thanks to Jim Norton for the video!
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Wikileaks is Not a Whistleblower Site
Jun 28th
An outstanding blog on Wikileaks is here and talks about how the site fails at being a “whistleblower site.” Despite its claims as a project for government transparency, it has not transformed a single government policy or generated any government hearings except for investigations into the leaks themselves.
From FAS.Org here:
WikiLeaks published the “secret ritual” of a college women’s sorority called Alpha Sigma Tau. Now Alpha Sigma Tau (like several other sororities “exposed” by WikiLeaks) is not known to have engaged in any form of misconduct, and WikiLeaks does not allege that it has. Rather, WikiLeaks chose to publish the group’s confidential ritual just because it could. This is not whistleblowing and it is not journalism. It is a kind of information vandalism.
In fact, WikiLeaks routinely tramples on the privacy of non-governmental, non-corporate groups for no valid public policy reason. It has published private rites of Masons, Mormons and other groups that cultivate confidential relations among their members. Most or all of these groups are defenseless against WikiLeaks’ intrusions. The only weapon they have is public contempt for WikiLeaks’ ruthless violation of their freedom of association, and even that has mostly been swept away in a wave of uncritical and even adulatory reporting about the brave “open government,” “whistleblower” site.
Wikileaks is simply a cabal of hackers and data thieves who justify their crimes of computer intrusion under the banner of “openness” and “transparency.” These same people are against copyrights for musicians and criminal sanctions against those who commit cyber crime. To them “information wants to be free.” Except of course, the current whereabouts and travel itenerary of Julian Assange. That must be protected.
Ironic, right? I repeat, Get Julian Assange. Tip of the hat to Kevin Poulsen.
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(1 votes, average: 6.00 out of 6) Loading ...Senator Byrd Died of Sprained Kleagle
Jun 28th
It was touch and go all day yesterday as Senator Robert Byrd fought off an infection of his kleagle. By midnight, the infection became septic and spread to his exalted cyclops. Below is a security camera screen cap of the emergency surgery to relieve some of the swelling.
Now he’s playing poker with Teddy Kennedy in hell and wondering why they won’t seat him at the whites only table.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...What it Takes to Make Leftists Sing National Anthem
Jun 27th
During the G20 protests, someone shot this awesome footage of a bunch of hippies, anarchists, and leftist stooges trying to confront the Royal Canadian Mounted Police with a offkey rendition of “Oh Canada” and an oh-so-brave “sit in.” Watch the fail.
They didn’t sing out of patriotism. They sang because they knew people would be filming.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Senate About to Become A Little Less Klanish?
Jun 27th
Senator Robert Byrd, Democrat and former Klansman is in the hospital. He may not survive his stay, which is ironic considering he voted for Obamacare.
From the StarTrib here:
The 92-year-old West Virginia Democrat has been in the hospital since late last week, his office said in a statement. At first Byrd was believed to be suffering from heat exhaustion and severe dehydration, the statement said, but other medical conditions have developed. His condition was described as serious.
Again, as a reminder, it was the Democrats who created the KKK to keep blacks in line and either not voting in elections or to vote Democrat. Considering that 90% of blacks still faithfully vote Democrat, I guess you could say the Klan’s tactics worked.
Here is a famous quote from Senator Byrd:
“I shall never fight in the armed forces with a Negro by my side… Rather I should die a thousand times, and see Old Glory trampled in the dirt never to rise again, than to see this beloved land of ours become degraded by race mongrels, a throwback to the blackest specimen from the wilds.”
- Robert C. Byrd, in a letter to Sen. Theodore Bilbo (D-MS), 1944
I wonder if West Virginia will vote another Democrat to the Senate as a replacement if he dies?
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...5 PM Music: Turin Brakes – Dark of Fire
Jun 27th
I’m usually not much for maudlin music, but this song has haunting melodies and great lyrics, and paired with this beautiful video of children playing cowboys and indians in the woods, it becomes awesome.
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Byron Sonne Still in Jail, Kristen Peterson Bailed Out by Mom and Dad
Jun 26th
Byron Sonne is in jail for purchasing the “shoebomber home terrorist kit” online and daring the cops to say boo about it. See the kerfluffle I started on that here. But his girlfriend/commonlaw wife, whose parents own the house she and he cohabitate in, bailed her ass out of jail on the condition she move back home with them. Byron still sits in jail wondering if his girlfriend’s parents mistakenly forgot to bail him out too.
From GlobeandMail here:
Kristen Peterson, a Toronto artist charged with possession of explosives and dangerous weapons following G20-related police investigation, was let out on bail Saturday afternoon.
Her (commonlaw) husband Byrone Sonne was to appear in court, as well, but his bail hearing has been pushed back to June 30 at the request of his lawyer Kevin Tilley.
Ms. Peterson was let out on a $25,000 bail posted by her parents Maureen and John Peterson. Her bail conditions stipulate she must live with them and have no direct or indirect access to her co-accused husband except in presence of lawyers.
She’s also not to be in possession of any kind of weapons, including explosives, and is not allowed to use the Internet to access any websites or social networking sites controlled by Mr. Sonne. She’s also prohibited from accessing his financial records.
Ms. Peterson, has been in police custody since her arrest Thursday, accused of obtaining the ingredients to make triacetone triperoxide – an unstable explosive often associated with terrorist attacks – and possessing potato guns for the purpose of threatening public safety.
Mr. Sonne is also accused of attempted mischief and intimidating members of the justice system.
Potato guns? That’s hilarious. What no mention of the Microwave gun that Sonne built in his home lab?
Oh yeah, potato guns actually work. Didn’t know those were illegal in Canada.
I write this post while much of downtown Toronto’s business district is being burned by Sonne’s leftist agitator friends who can’t stomach that World leaders like to have a confab every now and again. Sure the country blew a billion bucks on security. President Obama would boast here about how many jobs that created. I think one of the reasons Sonne was so bent out of shape and bitter is he couldn’t scrape up even a penny of those lucrative security contracts for his basement security business. So he posted tons of photos showing weaknesses in the deployed G20 security setup and urged his anarchist friends to act on his information.
Lots of his security peers are angry with me for contacting ISC2 about Sonne’s status as a CISSP and then posting that ISC2 had suspended his certification pending the outcome of the criminal investigation and trial. Many of them poo-pooed the value of the CISSP cert in one breath and berated me for getting that cert suspended for Sonne in the next. Can’t have it both ways, you know. They can be angry that it was valuable and was suspended, but to be angry that nothing of value was suspended makes no sense. Attrition.org was wondering how it was that I was able to get Sonne’s cert suspended if I didn’t follow ISC2′s affidavit process. I didn’t follow that process, and it wasn’t me that had it suspended. GlobeandMail reported it suspended hours prior to my inquiry with ISC2, but they can keep attributing that power to me if they wish. You see, the CISSP is a valuable brand and it is solely ISC2′s purview who gets to hold the cert and who doesn’t.
And for the record, spending a billion canuck bucks on a security system that allows your downtown to burn is a major fail. That money could build a really kickass waterpark and hotel complex on a remote military base someplace if the governments want to have a powwow. And there are golf courses for Obama on a military base in case he gets bored. Or better yet, why not just have a nice video teleconference?
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...I Can Haz Rear Legs?
Jun 25th
Kitty was too lazy to get out of the way of the grain combine and it had its rear feet severed. So a veterinarian installed these handy nubs.
From the Boston Globe here:
After losing his two rear paws in a nasty encounter with a combine harvester last October, the black cat with green eyes was outfitted with metallic pegs that link the ankle to the foot and mimic the way deer antlers grow through skin. Oscar is now back on his feet and hopping over hurdles like tissue paper rolls.
I think they should paste some fake fur on those nubs.
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(1 votes, average: 6.00 out of 6) Loading ...Moronic Milwaukee Democrats
Jun 25th
Hurr Durr. Look at this fat-armed Democrat. Point to her and laugh loudly along with me at her complete lack of education. Now laugh at all of the idiots who voted this woman to a position of power in Milwaukee. Here she is trying to boycott Arizona over that state’s law to deal with illegal immigration.
Senator Kyl is pointing and laughing too and then he sent this stupid broad a very nice letter. And a map. ROFLCOPTERS!
Thanks to Michelle Malkin for the photo!
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(1 votes, average: 4.00 out of 6) Loading ...Limited Edition Childhood Nightmare Plates
Jun 25th
I need this plate to help round out my series of creepy dishes. I already have the Elvis in his Casket dish, the Wet Sack of Kittens Dish but this one would be treasured, and only 20 dollars. This guy is so lucky to have found it on sale!
I mean, what clown would have painted this? And what clowns would buy this? No normal person would paint nor buy it right?
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This is How Liberals Clean Up Oil
Jun 24th
They go on YouTube and torture the rest of us with their own sense of self importance and bad singing. So who’s up for some Half-naked attic? off key Karaoke??! That would be this idiot, Emily Russell from Northampton Mass.
Wow! Thanks for actually doing something about the spill Emily. This was about as useful as donating your used tampons to soak up the spilled oil down at Jiffy Lube.
Emily is a Massachusetts chick who wasted her parent’s money going to a liberal college only to produce worthless art while she still camps in what looks like her parent’s attic.
She has her worthless art posted on a huge PDF file over at her website here. She has made a victorious installation art piece that contained pennies, piles of sand and some of her Mom’s wonderbread. She has filmed her loser friend naked in a tub cutting herself with a steak knife.
And the best are the photos of a gun in her mouth and against a pregnant belly.
Wow, such social merit for such deep pieces! How did she ever become so deep?? I’m sure she imagines herself as the next Robert Maplethorpe or Andres Serrano.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Tosh Breaks Down the Skateboarder Video
Jun 24th
Bleeding from the gooch. It doesn’t impress the 8th graders.
| Tosh.0 | ||||
| Video Breakdown – Skateboarder Goes Down | ||||
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...BP Giving Back to Community: Now Its Raining Oil
Jun 24th
I don’t know if this video legitimately shows the effects of oil evaporation and rain in the Gulf region.
But you know what? Some people see fallout from a horrifying environmental disaster. I see opportunity! You know, rainbow water is worth a fortune to Wiccans, witches and wizards of all stripes!
And when its raining oil, a smart man puts out a barrel. Or is that raining soup and man puts out a bowl? I forget how that Irish proverb goes.
And maybe God is just trying to put a dagger in New Orleans. He failed in 2005, so maybe this is His plan:
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Byron Sonne, G20 Bomber, Was a CISSP –UPDATED: Certification Suspended
Jun 24th
Byron Sonne is an activist lefty in Toronto. He set out to agitate and stir up trouble at the G20 Summit in Toronto and as it turns out he succeeded. Cops raided his house and arrested both him and the woman whom he refuses to marry, for possession of explosives.
The story would have ended there, but this guy also holds a Certified Information Systems Security Professional, issued by ISC2. This is his logo from his site at Halvdan.Com
The CISSP is a very well respected and difficult certification to obtain. I have one too, and I am very proud of my hard work and experience that allowed me to obtain the cert.
But there is a code of ethics that accompanies this certification, and if you are seen to violate that code you are supposed to be stripped of your cert. We’ll see whether or not ISC2 will strip Byron Sonne of his. The ethics say:
Code of Ethics Preamble:
?Safety of the commonwealth, duty to our principals, and to each other requires that we adhere, and be seen to adhere, to the highest ethical standards of behavior.
?Therefore, strict adherence to this Code is a condition of certification.
Code of Ethics Canons:?Protect society, the commonwealth, and the infrastructure.
?Act honorably, honestly, justly, responsibly, and legally.
?Provide diligent and competent service to principals.
?Advance and protect the profession.
I wonder if Byron still thinks that his agitation and terroristic activities were worth it now that he will likely be stripped of his cert and lose his job? Maybe he can get other lefties and anarchists to pay some speaking fees and provide security services for these louts?
Thanks to Mikko for the story.
UPDATE! I sent a complaint to ISC2 about Byron Sonne. I received this just now as a response:
Dear Mr. Belcher,
Thank you for bringing this to our attention. Be assured that we will continue to monitor the situation as it progresses. Until there has been a resolution in the matter, Mr. Sonne’s certification has been suspended.
Thank you for your concern for the certification.
Sincerely,
Marcia Thorpe
Senior Manager of Member Services
(ISC)2
Security Transcends Technology
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