Britney Spears to Invent Time Machine?

This movie will be epic. In the movie “The Yellow Star of Sophia and Eton,” Britney Spears will play the lead role of Sophia who heroically creates a time machine out of spare gum wrappers, old twine and a used Hyundai, and uses it to travel backwards in time to Germany during World War Two. There she visits a concentration camp where, she thinks, she will learn how to “think about stuff really really hard” but finds instead a bunch of skinny Jews.

“Ya’ll ain’t got nuthin’ better than stripes to wear??!  Dang!” she declares.  She then goes on to fall in love with a Jew in the concentration camp named Eton and during a love scene where she dry-humps Eton, shouts, “Don’t squeeze me so tight, you’ll crush my cigarettes, Dang!”

In the end she and Eton both get shot by Nazis trying to use the time machine to escape.  Seriously.  This is too good to be made up.  Well, I made up the dialogue.  Check out Hot Air here.  The National Ledger is quoted here:

…it is claimed a script for a film called The Yellow Star of Sophia and Eton has been handed to Britney to look at.

If she accepts the role, Britney will reportedly play the main role of Sophia LaMont, who creates a time machine and travels back to World War II where she meets a Jewish man called Eton at a concentration camp.

They then fall in love and travel back to the present day with the intention of getting married but they are both killed by Nazis.

FilmDrunk hilariously says:

Jeez, guys, tell us the ending why don’t you.  So basically, it’s like Where the Red Fern Grows but with Jews instead of coon hounds, and with time traveling Nazis.  But otherwise exactly the same.   Britney was reportedly intrigued by the idea of a “concentration camp,” but she’ll probably be really sad when she finds out what it is…