Caylee Anthony’s Dad Attempts Suicide By Giving Himself Wicked Bad Writer’s Cramps

George Anthony is still grieving over the loss of his granddaughter Caylee Anthony.  The toddler was murdered by her boozy party slut mother Casey Anthony, who dumped the little girl’s body in the woods by her home.  So it is little wonder that George Anthony, sick from grief and the media circus, ran off to commit suicide.  But after writing a six page Suicide note, his writer’s cramps were so bad he couldn’t get the bottle of sleeping pills open.

From MSNBC here:

The grandfather of slain Florida toddler Caylee Anthony was in stable condition Friday after he was taken to a hospital over concerns that he might be suicidal. Anthony was found early Friday at a Daytona Beach hotel after he was reported missing for several hours. Anthony sent text messages to family members indicating he “wanted to end his life.”

Police also found a “five to six page suicide letter,” he had written.

On Wednesday, reports were released showing that the toddler’s mouth was covered with silver duct tape that had been adorned with a heart-shaped sticker.  When investigators processed the duct tape at an FBI lab in Quantico, Va., they noticed the residue of a heart-shaped sticker on it. The sticker was later found near where the toddler’s remains were discovered.

I found this story over at FARK, and one of the commenters said, “Six pages? Christ, Tolstoy, care to boil it down a bit?”