I can't believe that came from your mouth!
Archive for November, 2008
10:30 PM Music: The Raconteurs- Old Enough
Nov 30th
One of the best songs from their new album, Consolers of the Lonely. Click to enjoy.
You can get the album here, or click on the album to go to Amazon.com.
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Are McDonalds Commercials Racist?
Nov 30th
A huge multinational corporation making racist sterotypical commercials that targeted blacks was the topic of conversation at my house last night. It seems that Mcdonalds cannot put a black person in a commercial unless he or she is dancing, rapping, popping and locking, or doing double dutch jump rope in the ghetto. Now contrast this with whites who appear in commercials, who merely enjoy a steaming cup of coffee and hash browns for breakfast, in a friendly, clean restaurant with broad American appeal. See the difference?
You begin to feel that McDonalds is being racist with the way they portray blacks. It began, some say, with this double dutch ad.
Now they have a black man rapping about chicken nuggets, and in this ad, the beautiful light-skinned black woman is dressed to the nines. Fried chicken bits and sex appeal accompany these stupid lyrics: “Girl you got a 10-piece please don’t be sting-ayyyy..”
Watch this next commercial where the child of the well-dressed black family enters the room with a giant boom box, and proceeds to pop and lock his way through a package of apples, yogurt, and caramel dipping sauce. The child’s stereotypical antics brings a smile to the stern faces of his family.
So is McDonalds deliberately portraying all blacks as having magical powers to dance and sing their way through a Big Mac meal? What is even more ironic is that McDonalds has done extensive market research and focus groups proving that these commercials are well received by their target audience, which means that not only do blacks not find such commercials offensive, they actually prefer them to other commercials! And this is not just in the USA either. Watch this commercial from Brazil where 4 black guys sing their way across a McDonald’s restaurant just like minstrels in a traveling roadshow.
Even when McDonalds portrays a black person in a positive light, such as a business owner who is taking a lunch break- McDonalds still brings on the racism. In this commercial the business owner runs a shop full of African knick-knacks. Not something sensible, such as a coffee shop, printing business or fashion boutique. And since the black owner won’t sing and dance, those African knick-knacks will.
So is McDonalds racist? Or the best ever at focus group marketing?
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What to Buy Your Level 1 Human
Nov 28th
Get him this adorable onesie! It’s the perfect gift for the spawn of geeky people. The screenprint is a D&D stat sheet for the humans who are just “getting into the game.”
Geeks are Sexy writer Casey Lynn says here:
A Level 1 Human may be saddled with dismal strength and HP and a tragic zero experience points, but that high charisma gives it the ability to lead henchmen (or possibly just entice you to coo at it).
My own level 1 human does not have henchmen, but he has definitely has charmed his mother and me into doing his bidding. Meals, sleep, entertainment, is all centered around HIM. But we’ll keep him around. Who knows, maybe his character class is Cleric, and he has bonus modifiers for his ability to turn the undead.
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Macy’s Rick Rolls America During Parade
Nov 27th
Macy’s conspired with Foster’s Home for Imaginary Friends to “Rick Roll” the country during this morning’s Thanksgiving Day Parade. It was EPIC.
Stick with it to the end when Cheese declares “I like Rick Rolling!”
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Just in Time for Christmas! Abortion Gift Cards!
Nov 27th
Planned Parenthood of Indiana is allowing people to purchase handy gift cards to give as cheerful holiday gifts. You want a stocking stuffer for that special someone who needs a good scrape? Is throwing a pregnant woman down the stairs just too violent and passe? Show some class this holiday season, and give the gift of convenience.

From Wishtv.com here, with thanks to Hot Air:
The certificates come in $25 increments. They can be used for everything from birth control to $58 examinations that include breast exams and pap tests. Men who receive healthcare at Planned Parenthood can use them too.
“They can be seen for sexually transmitted disease screenings, HIV tests and general prostate exams and those kinds of things,” said Struben-Hall.
Some Hoosiers 24-Hour News 8 talked to asked if the gift certificates could be used towards abortions. The answer is yes.
Not only does Planned Parenthood want to legalize the spread of HIV and AIDS, and accept donations to exterminate blacks, which fulfils Margaret Sanger’s vision of “race hygeine” now it is easier than ever to do. And supposedly you can give it to guys too, in case you know a dude with a rotted crotch. Maybe this would be the perfect companion to accompany the “Sorry I gave you the Clap” e-card.
So if these gift cards are only given to black people, would Planned Parenthood be charged with a hate crime?
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Lori Drew Dodges Felony Charges
Nov 26th
The stupid mother charged with driving a teenage girl to commit suicide had all felony charges dismissed against her. However, three minor misdemeanor charges stuck, and the jury convicted her of accessing a computer improperly. It turns out she used another person’s username and password to access the account of a fake Myspace profile of a boy. It was this profile that was used to taunt the girl, Megan Meier, and cause the girl to commit suicide.

From the AP here:
A jury on Wednesday was unable to reach a verdict on the main conspiracy charge and instead convicted a Missouri woman of three minor offenses for her role in an Internet hoax that apparently drove a 13-year-old girl to suicide.
The Los Angeles federal court jury rejected felony charges of accessing a computer without authorization to inflict emotional distress on young Megan Meier.
However, the jury found defendant Lori Drew guilty of three counts of the lesser offense of accessing a computer without authorization. Each count is punishable by up to one year in prison and a $100,000 fine.
Lori Drew won’t do a day in jail, as I predicted. And from this Wired article here, it reveals that Lori Drew really had nothing to do with the fake profile or the emails that drove Megan to suicide. It says here:
Ashley Grills said that the hoax was her idea, not Drew’s, and that it was Grills who created the Josh Evans profile, and later sent the cruel message that tipped the emotionally-vulnerable 13-year-old girl into her final, tragic act.
This trial came very close to setting a dangerous precedent that would have outlawed being anonymous while online, which would have gone a long way to stifling free speech. I’m glad that anonymity is preserved at least for now. Next, Missouri should get with the 21st century and enact laws that punish cyber bullies and cyber stalkers. Most of the other states have them.
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Racist Carleton University Student Council Ditches Charity
Nov 26th
Cystic Fibrosis is a terrible genetic disease which kills everyone who has it by suffocating them to death. The racists sitting on the Student Council of Carleton University don’t want to fundraise for it because they stupidly think the disease affects only white people and they aren’t interested in helping white people live.

Brittany Smyth: Putting the “Duh” in Canada
Council President and head racist Brittany Smyth voted for the measure because Cystic fibrosis “has been recently revealed to only affect white people, and primarily men” and the disease wasn’t “inclusive” enough. What a sick bitch. From the National Post here:
The Carleton University Students’ Association has voted to drop a cystic fibrosis charity as the beneficiary of its annual Shinearama fundraiser, supporting a motion that argued the disease is not “inclusive” enough.
Cystic fibrosis “has been recently revealed to only affect white people, and primarily men” said the motion read Monday night to student councillors, who voted almost unanimously in favour of it.
Nick Bergamini, a third-year journalism student on the student council, said he was the only elected councillor present to vote against the motion. The decision is an example of campus political correctness gone too far, he said.
“They’re not doctors. They’re playing politics with this,” said Mr. Bergamini. “I think they see this, in their own twisted way, as a win for diversity. I see it as a loss for people with cystic fibrosis.”
And then Brittany Smyth goes on a radio talkshow and tries to spin her decision as one made to simply “try out a new charity,” and they couldn’t possibly change their racist statement, which she heartily approved of, because “Roberts Rules of Order wouldn’t allow her.” She talks in a retarded valley girl sing-song cadence and ends every sentence like she’s asking a question. If you can stand listening to the idiot, download the MP3 here.
Joey Coleman offers some free advice to Brittany Smythe here, saying:
I was riding on the Hamilton city bus earlier tonight and the topic of discussion was “how stupid Carleton students are.” I went to Tim Hortons, and the topic of discussion was “how stupid Carleton students are.” I was at an arcade tonight and even gamers knew of CUSA’s stupidity. (Of course, they are not blaming CUSA, they are blaming you, the Carleton student and your university.)
I was reading my morning feeds from influential US blogs and the topic was “how stupid Carleton students are.” Even Australian sites are picking up on the story. The reality is this story will be helping fill US 24hr cable news airtime today. The question is if the story will change or continue to get worse.
Here’s my free advice to the CUSA president. Please be quiet, stop talking, stop the doublespeak and resign. Carleton students, please save yourselves. It’s time for a purge of CUSA.
I’d hate to be a Carleton student planning a career in the United States.
Since everyone is outraged at the racism of this student council, they released a statement saying they are going to reinstate the charity. Check out this spin:
“It has become clear that there is not an appetite at Carleton to change from Shinerama”
said Ms.Smyth “The responsible thing to do is to reverse the decision.”While the motion merely stated the students’ association would investigate switching to
another charity, students have made it clear that they do not want the change.“I both respect and admire the students’ commitment to the cause of raising funds for
cystic fibrosis.” stated Ms.Smyth “I believe this issue has been blown out of proportion
but the motion was never meant to imply that raising funds for Cystic Fibrosis research
was not a worthwhile cause. I do apologize for the negative attention Carleton has
received”.
This stupid woman still doesn’t get it. She says it was blown out of proportion, and sees nothing wrong with their views. It was never about what charity they chose to use. It was the elimination of this one charity for racist reasons that outraged everyone. And they remain unapologetic for that.
Any time anyone is talking about “ensuring diversity” or “pushing inclusiveness” they are being racist. You can’t be a bean counter of skin color, sex, and religion, because that makes you a racist, sexist or bigot.
Thanks to Michelle Malkin for the story.
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Reason 811 to HomeSchool: Economics teacher Won’t Get Busted Trying to Rape Children He Meets on Myspace
Nov 26th
Meet Scott Dietlin. He’s in his mid thirties, his hairline is quickly receding, and he has to friggin’ teach high school kids for a living. He sees middle age rushing toward him and has nothing to show for a successful run at life thus far. Basically, his life sucks, and he knows it. So he decided to blow off steam by having a MySpace hookup with a hot chick. But the hot chick was 15. And he didn’t care.

As it turned out, the girl was fictional. A couple of High School boys created the fake profile of the 15 year old on MySpace. As it turns out, the profile caught a sex predator who happened to also be a high school teacher. At first the prank on the teacher was funny, but when Dietlin sent the boys photos of himself naked, the boys laughed their asses off and then called the cops. Now Dietlin will be teaching the “History of anal rape in American Prisons in the 21st century” and the “Economics of swapping cigarettes for sexual favors and other privileges.”
From MercuryNews here:
A Petaluma high school teacher was arrested Saturday morning after setting up an illicit date with a person he believed was a 15-year-old girl.
Scott Eugene Dietlin, 34, a teacher of History and Economics at Casa Grande High School, was arrested in San Mateo on Saturday after showing up for a date with “Jackie,” a teenage persona created on MySpace by two teen boys.
The 15-year-old San Mateo County boys posted the online profile as a joke. When Dietlin allegedly contacted “Jackie” in April, the boys initially played along.
Over time, the communication included sexually explicit e-mails and text messages. At one point, Dietlin sent “Jackie” a naked photo of himself. The boys finally decided to call police.
Burlingame police began posing as “Jackie” and set up a date at a location in San Mateo on Saturday. Dietlin showed up that morning and was taken into custody. His bail has been set at $550,000.
If, at some point during any online romance, you find yourself standing alone in a room, naked, ready to take a picture of yourself with a digital camera, just go ahead and save the heartache and time of everyone involved, and email it to the local police department. Then they will come and take you to jail. You are too stupid to live amongst us civilized people.
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The Keys to an Ambulance Ride
Nov 25th
I used to think it was only annoying that our kid will grab our car keys and then run away and press the red panic button on the remote to make the car horn blare over and over again to annoy the neighbors. I think I now see another potential hazard of playing with the keys.

This little boy, 20 months old, fell on a set of keys and the key penetrated his brain. Miraculously, the tot made a full recovery, including his eyesight!
From the DailyMail here:
A toddler has been hailed a miracle after getting a set of keys lodged in his brain.
Nicholas Holderman fell on his parents’ car keys in a freak accident.
One entered his eyelid and penetrated his brain as these X-ray scans reveal.
But the 20-month-old US tot has since made a full recovery.
As a parent though, this xray is your worst nightmare. Congrats to the Holdermans on their kid making a complete recovery!
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Batman to be Killed?
Nov 25th
What is it about DC Comics that like to have their main characters murdered and rubbed out? Batman is rumored to be meeting his doom in the comic released tomorrow.

From the Telegraph here:
‘Batman RIP’ will see “the end of Bruce Wayne as Batman”, according to Grant Morrison.
There are rumours that Batman will suffer a gruesome end when his sidekick Robin goes over to “the dark side” and destroys him in a terrible betrayal.
Others speculate that Wayne may either retire from his duties or be killed by a mystery villain known as the Black Glove.
His fate will be revealed in the latest issue of DC Comic’s Batman, published on 26 November.
The article goes on to describe that Batman will face a fate worse than death. Something no one would expect to happen to these superhero types. So what does that mean? He slips in the shower and dies? Freak aneurism? Murdered while waiting in line at the 7-11 to buy a copy of TV Guide?
According to the official site here:
This is it – “Batman R.I.P.” concludes here! The final, heartrending confrontation between Bruce Wayne and Jezebel Jet. The final fate of The Dark Knight. And the horrifying and shocking truth behind the Black Glove. With The Joker, the Club of Villains, Robin, Damian, plus an ending you’ll never see coming – this one has it all!
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Trim Trim the Clown Molests Molests Little Girls
Nov 25th
A party clown by the name of “Trim Trim” was arrested for sexually molesting a 12 and 14 year old girl. What a shock that a clown would do something so heinous. But the name of “Trim Trim” should have been a big red flag. Two of them.

From MercuryNews here:
A man who worked as Trim-Trim the Clown at children’s birthday parties has been sentenced to 12 years in prison for continuous sexual abuse of two teenage girls.
David Albert Lemus, who appeared at parties in white pancake makeup, floppy shoes and a red wig and nose until his arrest in 2005, received the sentence Friday as part of a plea agreement that he struck with prosecutors.
Lemus was convicted of sexually abusing two girls, ages 12 and 14 at the time of his arrest, over five years.
The girls were 12 and 14 when he was arrested, but the abuse began 5 years earlier when the girls were 7 and 9. I hope his prison cellmates give him a pink sock and use it to make balloon animals.
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1 AM Music: Eagles of Death Metal – I Want You So Hard (Boys Bad News)
Nov 25th
I was cruising around my blog feeds and stumbled on this song linked from JohnFN at Threedonia here. The song is full of double entendre and a great guitar hook, and the video is quite funny. The guitar has the ability to blow the clothes off of random people either by the vibration of the chords or perhaps its the sheer awesomeness of the guitar solo. And is that Jack Black? And Dave Grohl? Click to witness the power.
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Upcoming Episode of House: A Worm in the Brain
Nov 24th
You’ve heard of earworms? Songs that get stuck in your head? Well this is a brain worm, and it comes from handling or eating raw pork or not washing your hands in the bathroom.

From Neatorama here:
Rosemary Alvarez went to the doctor because she had numbness in her arms and blurred vision. An MRI revealed something unusual deep in her brain stem, so doctors immediately sent her to surgery.
But they didn’t find the tumor they expected – instead, they found … a worm! Doctors said worms can come from eating undercooked pork or spread by people who don’t wash their hands after using the bathroom.
Oh yeah, there is a nifty video. Below is a screenshot of the doctor pulling the worm out of the lady’s brain. Click the wormy photo to see the video.
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The Kurgan Versus Church of Scientology
Nov 24th
FoxNews and the LATimes reported that a bald guy with tattoos charged the Co$ Celebrity Center in Hollywood armed with two swords. The security guards shot the guy in the face, because there can be only one, and this guy wasn’t it.

I suspect that the guy was a broke out of work actor/action star who was pissed off after losing all his money to the organization to “audit” him and remove his thetans. FoxNews says here:
A security guard shot and killed a man wielding two Samurai swords Sunday on the grounds of a Scientology building in Hollywood. The unidentified man approached three guards around noon in the parking lot of the Scientology Celebrity Centre.
The man was “close enough to hurt them” when one of the guards shot him. Detectives were questioning the guard to figure out the swordsman’s motive and determine whether the shooting was justified. Surveillance tape showed the man arriving at the center’s parking lot in a red convertible, then approaching the guards with a sword in each hand.
Who says ninjas are smart? You don’t show up in a red convertible in broad daylight. You show up in the dark of night and use smoke bombs and sleeping potions, duh!
LATimes has a description of the disgruntled former Co$ member here:
He said the man in his 40s, was involved with the church “a long time ago.”
He stopped the car abruptly in the driveway and climbed out with a 5-foot sword in his hand and an angry expression on his face. He was bald and had tattoos on his arms, walked toward the building, then returned to the car to get the other sword.
Update! The epic swordsman is revealed to be Mario Majorski, who used to be very deep into scientology.

He doesn’t look like the Kurgan, but he definitely looks like a brainwashing victim. Tsk tsk. If anyone needed to see a psychiatrist, it was probably this guy. I guess the tech just doesn’t work.
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Toby and Sheila: The Duck That Adopted the Beagle
Nov 23rd
Not long ago there was a viral video going around, set to the awesome music of Aerosmith’s “I Don’t Want to Miss a Thing,” of a lion named Christian who was raised from a cub by two city boys. When the lion got too big for the city, the animal was reintroduced to the wild in Africa. For some reason, the city boys went out to Africa to get hugs from their lion a few years later and the lion remembered them, and there were lots of misty-eyed commenters on the YouTubes. You can check out the video on Poppy’s page here.
Now there is a new video that is sure to make you gasp with awwws at the cuteness. Then it gets weird. Click to watch.
The translation from Spanish is:
1994, Toby arrived at the MacKenzie farm.
Incredibly, Sheila (an older duck) adopted him.
Together, they had a brother/sister relationship
Then, after Sheila died of old age…
… then, the MacKenzies had her stuffed
This is the video of the moment Toby got to see Sheila again
I found this on Fark and I was laughing until I cried. The bill fell on the dog’s nose! And the fat lady dragging the stuffed duck on a string, and the beagle chasing it??? WTF? Put wheels on the damn duck, lady!

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Grand Theft Auto IV- The Naked Gun Mashup
Nov 22nd
The Naked Gun’s opening credits are some of the funniest in motion picture history. Click below to enjoy.
Now someone at GamesRadar has taken clips from Grand theft Auto IV and matched it up to the music from The Naked Gun and the results are hilarious and whacky. Enjoy.
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Abraham Biggs, aka Candyjunkie, Kills Self Online
Nov 22nd
A lot of the news stories are downplaying the selfishness of Biggs’ final act, saying he was a confused teenager, while at the same time, decrying the words of the people in the online streaming video chatroom as heinous because some of them jeered and even egged him on to commit suicide. Below is a screencap of the chat room as the cops went into the home of Biggs to check on him due to a tip from one of the site’s visitors.

A complete timeline of what happened is at the Internet drama site (look, this link goes to a site that discusses suicide and has graphic images, so don’t click it and then act all traumatized) ED here.
The medical examiner’s office conducted an autopsy Thursday and determined Biggs died from a drug overdose. The toxicology report indicated he had ingested a deadly combination of benzodiazepine, a depressant used to treat insomnia, and opiates. He had a prescription for some of the drugs, but not all.
Biggs Jr. wrote what appeared to be a suicide note and posted it on his MySpace page Nov. 13:
”I can honestly say I’ve finally closed a chapter in my life that tonight that ended a long time ago. For my closest friends, you know who exactly I’m talking about, but I guess it really does take that last kiss goodbye till you finally turn your back on someone and not even think of looking back,” Biggs wrote.
“Good Night Myspacer [sic], I think I’m gonna go in at only 1:29 AM.”
The paper reports the story as if Biggs was a teenager. He was 19, so he was a man. And he knew what he was doing. And he was being a bit of a drama queen about his whole “shuffling off the mortal coil” and all. Reports say he had attempted suicide before and talked of it often. My sympathy goes to his family for their tragic loss.
But as tragic as his death was, I am claiming Abraham Biggs’ unused carbon credits. I called dibs, so I get them under salvage laws of this country. And don’t you start booing me for being a heartless bastard- I’m just thinking like a liberal. This guy is carbon neutral now, thank Gaea, and will spew no more awful CO2 into the atmosphere. But he had a good 60 years worth of living ahead of him, and that’s a lot of unspent carbon.
“But Pat,” you say, “the guy is not even in the ground yet! How can you say these things?” Hey, it’s not my fault the guy’s life was unsustainable. Maybe he didn’t believe that Obama was going to bring him any hope OR change. Or maybe he was dejected because he didn’t get a Congressional bailout package like AIG. But if you really feel sorry for Biggs, you can leave your condolences on his Myspace Page here.
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Eco-Religionists Want to Ban Flush Toilets
Nov 21st
I have no idea why leftist Gaea worshipers are always pondering their poop and pee and looking for ways to keep it around them longer. I have written several times before how they want to restrict everyone to one piece of toilet paper, want to flush the toilet only once per week, and even reusing tampons. The latest dumb idea is to ban flushing toilets. I guess they want to bring back the days of black slaves and peasants emptying chamber pots.

From News.Com.Au here:
Sanitation experts have called for the end of the flushing toilet to save water and provide fertilizer for crops.
Leading health advocates have called for the use of “dry” toilets which separate urine from feces and remove the need to flush.
Speaking at the recent World Toilet Summit in Macau, World Toilet Organisation founder Jack Sims said the concept of the flushing toilet was unsustainable.
Mr Sims said a culture where people flushed their loos but disregarded the thousands of litres of wasted drinking water each year was one of sanitation’s greatest challenges. “This ‘flush and forget’ attitude creates a new problem which we have to revisit,” he said.
There have already been calls by Australian experts to reduce the amount of water wasted through toilet flushing with a proposed new toilet tax, which would encourage people to take shorter showers, recycle washing machine water or connect rainwater tanks to internal plumbing.
“Some people may go as far as not flushing their toilet as often, as the less sewage you produce the less the rate you pay,” Professor Young said.
First of all who are these “Sanitation experts?” Jack Sims is a poop-obsessed crackpot who has not earned a degree in anything. No other experts are cited for this article. And its clear that Jack has no idea how a modern sewer system works- the water is recycled and the solid wastes are used for fertilizer. You don’t need your toilet to do that.
And whenever you hear any liberal talking about something as “unsustainable” keep an eye on your wallet. That is a buzzword for “I want to raise your taxes and give you nothing in return.”
And notice how liberals are always up for changing someone’s culture as long as it doesn’t fit into their dirt-worshiping utopian worldview? Changing the culture of Muslims who want to kill us, and they tut-tut us and call us racists. Well, anyone who wants to take away my flush toilets are racists too for wanting to genocide my culture of not having poop lying in a porcelain bowl.
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Evolution of Malcode Criminals
Nov 21st
The guys who write viruses and malware aren’t the mischief makers or yore. The bad guys have figured out that the best way to get their malware removed from an infected system is to make the malware be noisy- send out tons of spam, flood the network with packets, and make the host almost unusable for its owner. Within short order, the host is repaired, or flattened and reloaded. Now the bad guys are being quiet, and infections are on the rise and more and more criminals are making money from their malware. Mikko Hyponen from F-Secure has this outstanding video explaining how malware has evolved from trojan horse attachments in email to drive-by downloads that finance international terror.
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And Now, Here are Some Chickens Playing the Piano
Nov 20th
Blogging is light because I’m in training classes for my upcoming CISM exam. So have a look at the archives, do random searches, and explore the site. Now for those chickens-
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