I can't believe that came from your mouth!
Archive for November, 2007
Google Fighting Back Against Ranking Poisoners
Nov 30th
There have been multiple reports recently about botnets flooding Google with bogus search requests intended to steer its users toward false hits that are riddled with malware. And once Google straightened it up, the botnets changed keywords.
Now Google is fighting back with a Turing challenge. It seems that Google is able to sense when keyword searches are likely caused by botnets and is stopping the bots from completing their searches by asking for a captcha feedback.
See an example below for a common search I had submitted.
Had the bot completed the google search, he would have then clicked on his own malware site hosting his keyword in order to drive it upwards in Google’s results rankings. As such, unsuspecting real users, making a similar request, may have ended up clicking on the bogus website and becoming infected with a drive-by download.
I wonder if they will be doing this to fight click fraud too? By doing that, they would put a serious dent in the wallets of bot herders.
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Loading ...Reason 227 to Homeschool
Nov 30th
The fat teacher won’t take your 14 Year-Old son to “Inspiration Point.”
Meet Jennifer Tarkenton. She is a Junior High School teacher at Greenwood Lakes Middle School in Lake Mary, Florida. When she’s not teaching or raising her child, she is buying condoms for her male students and taking them to park on dark deserted streets to have sex with them.
From Local6.Com here with video:
A Seminole County middle school teacher was arrested Friday after deputies said they discovered her inside a vehicle shortly after she had sex with a 14-year-old boy.
Jennifer Tarkenton, 34, of Lake Mary, was arrested on three counts of lewd or lascivious battery on a child 12 or older by a person over the age of 18.
Tarkenton is a teacher at Greenwood Lakes Middle School in Lake Mary. The boy is a student at the school.
Deputies responded to reports of a suspicious vehicle at about 10 p.m. Thursday in the area of 800 Banana Lake Road in Lake Mary. Deputies said a woman, later identified as Tarkenton, and a 14-year-old boy were inside the vehicle.
The boy told deputies that he and Tarkenton had sex inside the vehicle after she picked him up at his house, drove to a nearby pharmacy and purchased condoms.
Boy, this teacher knows how to party. Here she is out with her sister, nearly pulling the stripper pole out of its supports with her girth.
Her MySpace page is here. Oddly enough, she hasn’t made it private right away, but continues to log into it. At the top of the page is a stupid quote by Bob Marley saying that anyone who tries to judge someone should make sure their hands are clean first.
Riiiight. Bob smoked a lot of dope, but I don’t remember him banging little kids in his car late at night.
No word on whether or not the school has fired Tarkenton or taken her child into protective custody since its wrong to have a child that close to a child sex offender.
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(6 votes, average: 5.00 out of 6) Loading ...Barbarians Cry Out for Blood of the White Woman
Nov 30th
Make no mistake, this is a religious issue. Remember that this is what Islam is all about. Thousands screaming in the street to murder a woman for naming a stuffed animal Mohammad. Next time someone tries to call Islam the “Religion of Peace” kick them in the nuts.
From the AP here:
Thousands of Sudanese, many armed with clubs and knives, rallied Friday in a central square and demanded the execution of a British teacher convicted of insulting Islam for allowing her students to name a teddy bear “Muhammad.”
The protesters streamed out of mosques after Friday sermons, as pickup trucks with loudspeakers blared messages against Gibbons, who was sentenced Thursday to 15 days in prison and deportation. She avoided the more serious punishment of 40 lashes.
They called for Gibbons’ execution, saying, “No tolerance: Execution,” and “Kill her, kill her by firing squad.”
A Muslim cleric at Khartoum’s main Martyrs Mosque denounced Gibbons during one sermon, saying she intentionally insulted Islam. “Imprisoning this lady does not satisfy the thirst of Muslims in Sudan. But we welcome imprisonment and expulsion,” the cleric, Abdul-Jalil Nazeer al-Karouri, a well-known hard-liner, told worshippers.
Thirst of Muslims. Islam is a cult of death and blood is their sacred sacrament. Meanwhile, thousands of like-minded Sudanese are assuming a quiet, Carbon-Neutral, position in Darfur. So there is that.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Precious Schoolgirl is a Dirty Emo Cutter
Nov 30th
Emos in the News! Afraid that people will tell her Mommy that she cuts herself and angry at being called an Emo, this little princess attacked a student on a schoolbus with a razor blade.
From NWGDailyNews here:
A 12-year-old girl faces felony charges for lashing out at another student with a razor blade on a school bus at Halloween.
The girl, a sixth-grader, told investigators she was upset at the other student for threatening to tell her mother that she had been cutting herself.
She became even madder when other kids on the bus began “calling her an ‘Emo.’”
She said she lashed out at him with the blade but didn’t intend for any injury. The boy’s jeans were sliced and his parent said his leg was injured. A deputy did not notice any visible wound the day after the incident.
The girl was charged with aggravated battery and is scheduled to appear in court Dec. 26.
I wonder where she got the idea to cut herself? MTV? The Internet? And at what young age do most girls realize that they won’t be perfect Barbie Dolls/Supermodels and begin to loathe themselves?
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(1 votes, average: 3.00 out of 6) Loading ...I Want My $17.50 Plus Tip!
Nov 30th
I have mentioned before that I used to deliver pizzas back in the day. So when I see articles that involve bad pizza runs, I usually take notice. Here is a good one. A guy delivers a pie, ribs and shrimp to a fat black bitch and she takes the food and slams the door in his face without paying.
Yeah, he gets the cops to bash the door in. Rock on!
From the AP here:
Police used a battering ram to break down an apartment door and arrest a woman they say grabbed food from a pizza delivery man but failed to pay him.
Jessica Gray, 19, of Eastpointe was arrested Wednesday after she and the occupants of her apartment refused to pay for a delivery of pizza, ribs, chicken, shrimp and a soda valued at $17.18.
Gray took the meal, then slammed the door and joined four other female occupants inside — ranging in age from 14 to 21 — in yelling insults and threats when he didn’t leave.
“She was rough when she took it from him,” Detective Lt. Leo Borowsky said. “And she was large enough where he didn’t want to fight her.”
Responding officers “could hear the occupants laughing and whispering inside but refusing to answer the door. The officers advised the occupants that if they refused to come to the door, it would be opened by force.”
Police then broke down the door, and the delivery man identified Gray as the person who took the meal. Police recovered rib bones, chicken bones and shrimp tails as evidence.
Gray was arraigned Thursday on a felony charge of larceny from a person, then released after posting a $5,000 bond.
And in related news, you can get chicken, ribs, shrimp and a pizza for just 17 bucks in Detroit. Freakin’ crime-infested, impoverished city with their non-tipping residents makes Detroit the worst city in the world for pizza delivery.
And Jessica Gray’s ghetto-licious MySpace page is here. On it she says,
What up to everyone on myspace. This ya gurl jessica reppin tha 313 all day everyday. G diamonds 4 life. Me im cool azz he11.I drink, I smoke, I go to partys, I like to have fun. I have a 3 year old son he is my heart. Im dark skin ,brown eyes, my hair is past my shoulders im about 220 to 225 pounds. If you dont like how i look go to he11. 4 all the hoes that want to hate u can suck my COCK.
I bet she’s lying about her weight.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Rodney King Shot; Manages to Survive
Nov 29th
Rodney King is back in the news again. And there were cops. And liquor. And Rodney trying to poorly navigate a vehicle (a bicycle!) through the city streets. Somehow he manages to escape death’s clutches once again.
Another swing and a miss by the Grim Reaper.
From the AP here:
Rodney King, whose videotaped police beating in 1991 led to deadly rioting when the officers involved were acquitted, was shot on a street corner, but his wounds were not life-threatening.
King, 42, was shot two or three times from a distance by birdshot fired from a shotgun. He then bicycled about 1 1/2 miles back to his home in neighboring Rialto and called police. King was hit in the face, arms, back and torso, police said.
Authorities said when they arrived at the home, King and others appeared drunk and were largely uncooperative in providing information about the shooting.
The shooting may have involved a domestic dispute, San Bernardino police Lieutenant Scott Paterson said.
Hearing the news, Damian “Football” Williams smashed a brick into the face of a girl scout.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Hair. It’s What’s For Dinner
Nov 29th
The picture below is not a wet otter. Its not a weasel or a ferret. Its a giant bezoar taken from a ditzy chick’s stomach who had a hair chewing habit. She waited to see a doctor until after she almost became anorexic and doubled over with abdominal pains.
Will hacking up furballs become the new fad among the mopey emo teens? Maybe. From NBC4 here:
Doctors recently took a 10-pound hairball from an 18-year-old woman after she came to them with pain and a 40-pound weight loss.
The New England Journal of Medicine said the woman had been suffering with pain in her abdomen for about five months. Doctors found a mass there, and when they used a small camera, found that the hairball was taking up nearly her entire stomach.
The patient said that she has a habit of eating her own hair, a condition called trichophagia.
The journal’s report said the girl left the hospital after five days and was asked to follow up with a psychiatrist. Within a year, she had regained about half of the weight she lost and said she had stopped eating her hair.
How hard do you have to try to ignore your daughter’s hair eating habit to allow something like this to happen?
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(3 votes, average: 5.33 out of 6) Loading ...Slurp the Art
Nov 29th
Now this is what I call an art gallery that knows how to have fun. At a Dresden Art Gallery, Hannes Broecker has hung framed containers of self-serve cocktails on the wall. Each has its own pour spout, and the “art” portion is that you drink away the color.
From the CoolHunter here, thanks to Neatorama for the link:
Regardless of what we do or do not understand about art, we can all agree, it stimulates our senses. Broecker has aroused our sense of taste (not to mention eliminated the need of elbowing our way to the bar) by hanging flat, glass containers with a variety of cocktails in the exhibition space. As the night progressed, the levels of the multi-colored infusions diminished. By the end of the event, the art, itself, ran dry, and empty drinking glasses were returned to where they were originally placed.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Heath Ledger’s Joker
Nov 28th
Was revealed today by Empire Magazine.
All this hype for weeks about Heath Ledger’s insane look in the upcoming movie the Dark Knight, and finally I realize I’ve seen this guy somewhere before.
Sigh.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Bible Verses That Kick Ass
Nov 28th
Cracked Magazine has 9 of the most ass-kicking Bible verses ever. My favorite one is about the bears that Elisha summons up to slay a bunch of bratty children because they made fun of the glare coming off of his bald dome!
Yep, that’s pretty hardcore for making fun of someone 8000 years before the invention of Rogaine.
If you thought old men could be grumpy and yell at the kids to stay off their lawns, well, now you know what they would do if they had the power to summon grizzlies.
When I first heard of that verse as a kid in Sunday School, I realized immediately that God was very moody. Bees? Sure. Fire ants? Why not? I would even understand a hail storm. But God sent bears to eat little kids for taunting?? That was way before the whole “forgiveness” part of the Bible.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Mary Shieler Cybersexed Brian Barrett to Death
Nov 28th
Mary Shieler of Oak Hill, West Virginia, is a married mother of two. She is in her forties, pudgy and by all definitions, a house frau.
Mary used her daughter’s online identity to seduce two men online, both of whom worked at the same factory outside Buffalo New York. She turned the men against each other and one of them gunned the other down in cold blood.
Tom Montgomery killed Brian Barrett in a jealous rage over a stupid cyber love triangle.
Now one man is dead, the other is in jail for 20 years, leaving a broken and humiliated family behind, and Mary Shieler is a free woman.
Everyone in this sad tale helped to bring about this tragic end to Brian Barrett’s life at the age of 22. Mary posed as a hot 18 year old and used cybersex to seduce Tom Montgomery, 48, who was pretending to be a hot, disturbed Iraq War marine online. When Tom’s true identity was outed by his own wife, an angry Mary enlisted the help of Brian Barrett, Tom’s coworker, to use Mary’s passwords to her chat accounts to hound and humiliate Tom online. And when the rivalry grew intense, Tom shot and killed Brian.
From the SFGate here:
A 48-year-old man entangled in an Internet love triangle built largely on lies was sentenced Tuesday to 20 years in prison for killing his rival for the affection of a woman he had never met.
Thomas Montgomery, who posed as an 18-year-old Marine in online chats, pleaded guilty in August to gunning down Brian Barrett, 22, in a parking lot at the suburban Buffalo factory where they worked.
The motive was jealousy, investigators said. Both were involved online with a middle-aged West Virginia mother — who herself was posing as an 18-year-old student.
Prosecutor Frank Sedita argued for the maximum sentence of 25 years, describing Montgomery’s “almost predatory” pursuit of the woman and his resentment of Barrett when she cooled to Montgomery’s advances after 1 1/2 years and thousands of pages of Internet chats.
Montgomery began chatting with the woman, identified in court as Mary Shieler, in 2005. Occasionally, the woman would mail packages to his home. When one of the packages was intercepted by Montgomery’s wife, she wrote back, telling Shieler her husband’s true age and saying he was married.
Barrett, whom Montgomery had mentioned in his exchanges, was drawn into the triangle after Shieler contacted him online to confirm what she had been told by Montgomery’s wife.
This story makes it sound pretty cut and dry. To read all the sordid details, check out this Wired story. It is very detailed, including the bits that Mary didn’t want her real name used because she was supposedly an upstanding citizen. Her daughter, Jessi, was quoted in the paper several times during her school’s girls basketball championship run.
But Mary Shieler remains a free woman, which is somehow, grossly unfair. She committed aggravated identity theft to torment an unstable married man to the point that he murdered another man! How self absorbed and vacuous can a bitch be? She sounds just like the neighbors who drove a young girl to suicide by creating a fake profile on Myspace.
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(10 votes, average: 4.50 out of 6) Loading ...Pay Your Porn Bill!
Nov 27th
McAfee’s Avert labs has an amusing post about a crazy, aggressive popup reminder that will completely take over your PC if you don’t pay for your hardcore porno account.
Even though the user agreement states the terms, most people don’t bother to read such nonsense and want to get right to the fun stuff. But by agreeing to the text and downloading and installing the “authentication” tool, you are actually downloading a utility that will keep you from using your own PC if you don’t pay your bill on time!
From Avert Labs here:
They are claiming the right to disrupt and potentially completely disable use of your computer as a means to compel payment. Depending on the current display resolution of the system the locked billing popup can indeed obscure things to the point of making it unusable. The popup window will automatically restore itself if resized or moved. It also carries the “always on top” attribute, so it will cover other desktop elements or application windows.
Go read the whole article to be astounded at the daily late fees that rack up!
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Katherine Lester to Abdullah Psycho: Its Not Me, Its You
Nov 27th
As I wrote last time, Katherine Lester is back in the USA, and she went on Dr. Phil to give her side of the story and to report that yes, she was finished with the punk jihadi of the West Bank.
Drama Queen.
Wondering if he can buy suicide belt on Amazon.com.
From Dr. Phil.com here:
“Abdullah’s behavior since I’ve been home has been possessive, verbally agrressive,” Katherine says. “I consider Abdullah a stalker. Abdullah has left me 34 voicemails within an hour. I have not called him once. He was swearing at me so loud on the phone, calling me a slut, a bitch, a whore. I realized that my relationship with Abdullah was over that night. I always knew it wasn’t going to work, but I tried.
“When I break up with him, he threatens me, and that’s why I have to talk to him, threatening me, like, ‘If you don’t talk to me, I’m going to torture your family. I’m going to call your dad and tell him that you’re having sex.’ I was like, ‘I need a break from you,’ and he told me to take my break and shove it up my ***. I don’t have any intention of seeing him. I’ve already told Abdullah that we’re not getting married 100 billion times, but he will not take no for an answer,” Katherine says.
You know, Muslims have to treat their women this way. Its in the Koran.
When it came time for the big kiss-off, the conversation went like this:
“I just, I can’t be with you anymore,” Katherine said.
“What about the promises? What about everything we had together? Is it because of this stupid show?” he asks. “Just tell me.”
“No, it’s not because of the show,” she says.
“Is it because of me? Is it because of me?”
“Yeah. It’s your attitude,” Katherine says.
Maybe Katherine Lester has finally milked this insane drama cow dry. Lets hope she stays in the US and stays off the internet.
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(12 votes, average: 3.50 out of 6) Loading ...Stephen King Thinks Jenna Bush Should Be Waterboarded
Nov 27th
Out of gas and out of options, David kills his young son and his three passengers with the only four bullets in his gun, then throws himself to the mercy of the Monster in the Mist, begging to be killed. But the Army shows up to rescue him instead of the monster. Oops. If only he waited a few minutes more. That’s how the stupid Stephen King Movie, The Mist ends.
Hope I don’t drive away any potential ticket sales.
When you have a movie on the market, don’t get quoted saying you want to subject the President’s daughter to an interrogation technique.
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(1 votes, average: 6.00 out of 6) Loading ...Maybe Hogan Doesn’t Really Know Jack
Nov 27th
If Terry “Hulk Hogan” Bollea really “knew best” as his VH-1 TV series claimed he did, he wouldn’t have let his simpleton son Nick watch Fast and the Furious too many times and wouldn’t have let his homely tone-deaf daughter Brooke think she was a pop star, which she’s NOT.
Now that Nick is facing jail time for almost killing his friend in yet another high speed smash-up, the pressure is really straining the marriage. Linda Bollea wants out and she wants her share of the Florida properties and alimony.
From the AP here:
Hulk Hogan’s wife said in a divorce petition that she wants a share of the family’s two multimillion-dollar Florida properties plus alimony and child support for their 17-year-old son.
Linda Bollea filed for divorce from Hogan — whose real name is Terry Bollea — last week after 24 years of marriage. The petition says the marriage is “irretrievably broken.”
Linda Bollea also seeks an unspecified amount for alimony and child support for their 17-year-old son, Nick, who was arrested this month in connection with a traffic crash that left a passenger with severe brain injuries.
The Bolleas have starred for four seasons in the VH1 reality show “Hogan Knows Best,” which chronicles the lives of the famous wrestler and his family, including daughter Brooke, 19.
I guess next season’s episodes will feature Terry getting a job at Arby’s to help pay his alimony.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Region Mourns the Loss of #21
Nov 27th
Sean Taylor was so young. This is a senseless tragedy. The whole Northern Virginia region is somberly buzzing about the death of this very talented athlete.
Sean Taylor was only 24 years old.
From the AP here:
Washington Redskins safety Sean Taylor died early Tuesday, a day after the Pro Bowl player was shot at home by what police say was an intruder. He was 24.
Taylor died at Jackson Memorial Hospital, where he had been airlifted after the shooting early Monday.
Taylor, the fifth overall pick in the 2004 NFL draft following an All-American season at the University of Miami, was shot early Monday in the upper leg, damaging the key femoral artery and causing significant blood loss.
I don’t know if its likely that they will find his killer. NOVA’s collective heart goes out to the Taylor family at this time of their loss.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Satellite Data Shows Earth is Cooling
Nov 26th
Cooling to 1983 levels. Somehow I have a feeling that Al Gore will try to take credit for it or bill us for it.
From the Telegraph here:
The latest US satellite figures showing temperatures having fallen since 1998, declining in 2007 to a 1983 level – not to mention the newly revised figures for US surface temperatures showing that the 1930s had four of the 10 warmest years of the past century, with the hottest year of all being not 1998, as was previously claimed, but 1934.
But the figures of the warmest years being in the 30′s doesn’t jibe well with the current political tempo. So either the data will be ignored or covered up to fit the hoax that CO2 is killing us all.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...VH-1 Steals My Idea
Nov 26th
Kinda. They have a new show coming out called “Celebrity Rehab.” They should make it a gameshow like I suggested to do here several years ago.
No word if Whitney will be smoking crack on the show.
From Fox News here:
Videos of celebrity has-beens using illegal drugs or simulating drug use are circulating on YouTube in clips apparently taken from a forthcoming VH1 show about fallen stars in rehab.
“Celebrity Rehab,” scheduled to premiere Jan. 10, will track celebrities gone bad as they go through treatment for drug and alcohol addiction.
Among the nine former stars expected to be featured are “American Idol” finalist Jessica Sierra, porn star and onetime California governor hopeful Mary Carey, actor Daniel Baldwin, actress Brigitte Nielsen and former pro wrestler Chyna, according to The New York Post.
Dr. Drew Pinsky will host the show; filming is under way in Pasadena, Calif.
I like Dr. Drew and admire the work he does with addiciton. But this show will be more of a train-wreck than a serious discussion about overcoming addicitons.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...This Was My Weekend
Nov 26th
I was waylaid by a stomach virus. My wife will be very happy to get me out of the house. Dane Cook describes it best in the video below:
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Should Have Named the Bear Adolf
Nov 26th
Ah, those tolerant Muslims! A first grade teacher that teaches little jihadis english in the Muslim nation of Sudan was jailed because she named a teddybear “Mohammad.”
From the AFP here:
Sudanese police have arrested a British school teacher and accused her of insulting the Muslim prophet after allowing six-year-old pupils to name a teddy bear Mohammed.
Gillian Gibbons was arrested on Sunday after parents complained about the incident, understood to have happened a while ago at an English-language private school. She spent the night in custody but has not yet been charged.
Islamic Sharia law is enforced in northern Sudan and Islam is the majority religion in what is Africa’s biggest country, a former British colony.
If she had named the stuffed animal Adolf the Jew Killer she would still be free. This is what happens when you try to teach barbarians how to be normal.
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