I can't believe that came from your mouth!
Archive for July, 2007
Chinese Tourist Dives Into African Volcano
Jul 8th
Another weird thing about Chinese culture is that everyone in the country goes on vacation at the same time for two weeks during the year. Could you imagine that? Your whole town shuts down and everyone goes on travel to see the sights- and your town trots out tourist traps to attract fellow tourists to visit your little piece of the world.
One Chinese woman decided she would vacation in the darkest corner of the world- the border of Rwanda and the Congo where the only tourist attraction is a volcano and its lake of fire. And with camera in hand, this Chinese lady vaulted over the rim of the volcano to get a close-up photo. She slid down the inside of the cone and roasted herself over the fiery lake.
From Reuters here:
A Chinese tourist who fell into the crater of a volcano in eastern Democratic Republic of Congo has died Saturday.
Cecilia Cheng Siuyan climbed over the crater rim of the Nyiragongo volcano near Congo’s border with Rwanda on Friday to take a photo but slipped and fell more than 100 metres (300 feet) before coming to rest on a ledge above the lake of lava.
“She is dead, but they haven’t yet been able to remove the body,” Celestin Kasereka, director of the volcanological observatory in the nearby city of Goma, told Reuters.
Seriously, who vacations in the freakin’ Congo?
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Loading ...New Baby Photos
Jul 7th
We finally ordered our birth announcements today from Shutterfly. I guess we were waiting until we had some good photos to include with the announcements. Here are the four we chose for them.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Investigators of Benoit Murder Think Dog Ate Steroids
Jul 6th
As a bizarre update to the tragic Chris Benoit murder/suicide case, investigators had been scratching their head trying to locate Benoit’s missing stash of Steroids. In what had been described as ten months of steroids prescribed every 8 weeks, many experts did not believe that the dead wrestler could possibly inject so much juice.
Now investigators have a new lead in the steroid disappearance. The family dog may have eaten some or all of the prescribed medications! But sources close to the investigation won’t confirm the rumor, citing an ongoing investigation. But this picture of “Mangler” the family’s Whippet breed of dog was leaked to the press.
Actually, this is Wendy the Whippet, a Canadian pooch who has a genetic mutation making her muscles bulge. But I hear she can bench press 5 big-ass bags of Alpo.
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(1 votes, average: 2.00 out of 6) Loading ...Muslim Terrorists Use Stolen American ID’s to Finance War
Jul 6th
For years I have been saying that if organized criminals from Russia can create phishing scams to steal ID’s and finance their operations, it is just as easy for Al Queda to do it.
From left to right, Waseem Mughal, Younis Tsouli and Tariq al-Daour. The three men pleaded guilty this week to a terrorism charge in the United Kingdom. (Scotland Yard)
Brian Krebs has an outstanding article in the WaPo here that traces one woman’s Ebay phishing web click to three Muslim men who pleaded guilty to sponsoring terrorism. They were using American money to help finance terror attacks.
The story follows the trail of a woman’s stolen personal data back to three young men in the United Kingdom who were sentenced to prison for inciting murder through an online terrorism network.
A few stats from the piece: The trio stole more than 37,000 credit card numbers, racking up in excess of $3.5 million in fraudulent charges and purchases, including hundreds of prepaid cell phones, and more than 250 airline tickets using 110 different credit cards at 46 airlines and travel agencies. The men also laundered money through online gambling sites — using accounts set up with stolen credit card numbers and victims’ identities.
If you haven’t checked your credit report, you should do so. You could have old accounts that have been opened in your name that you had no idea existed. You can even set it up to have the credit agencies email you whenever a new line of credit is opened so you know immediately if you are a victim to ID theft.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Dinotopia is a Must for Boys’ Libraries
Jul 6th
I was very pleased to stumble upon a copy of Dinotopia the other day in my wife’s book collection. It is a paperback book that poses as a scientist’s lost sketchbook that details mid 19th century life on an uncharted island where humans and dinosaurs live in harmony.
The book espouses quite a few liberal ideals such as veganism, environmental stewardship (it mentions that the lumber for a treehouse city all came from trees that were knocked down in a storm) and commune labor and thinking, which annoys me a bit- but the artwork and imagination of an island where people interact with dinosaurs is too fantastic of an idea to pass up. It will definitely be added to my son’s library.
The detailed artwork on dinosaurs makes this book a must have for children and adults alike. You can get yours here.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Global Warming Blamed for Draining a Lake
Jul 6th
Boy these Global Warming Zealots just won’t quit. They look for any excuse to label natural phenomena as a Global Warming Disaster. The latest case is a mountain top lake in Chile. Its not a very big hole in the ground, but it used to be filled up with water. Something happened and it suddenly drained, and you can see the picture below that there are people standing in its now empty crater.
But one jackass scientist, a glacier studying moron sniffing for new grant money, used the excuse of the now-empty crater to declare that all of the glaciers in the region are getting thinner. “Because there must have been some melting occurring, which added to the water level, which put pressure on the natural clog that kept the water there! Don’t you see? Global Warming will kill us all! Run for the hills!”
This story was originally published two weeks ago, and geologists remarked at the time that the earth opened up and swallowed the water. Now its global warming!
From the AP here:
Scientists on Tuesday blamed global warming for the disappearance of a glacial lake in remote southern Chile that faded away in just two months, leaving just a crater behind.
The disappearance of the lake in Bernardo O’Higgins National Park was discovered in late May by park rangers, who were stunned to find a 130-foot deep crater where a large lake had been.
After flying over the lake Monday scientists said they were able to draw preliminary conclusions that point to climate change as the leading culprit for the lake’s disappearance.
They suggested the melting of nearby glaciers raised the lake’s level to the point where the increased water pressure caused part of a glacier acting as a dam to give way. Water in the lake flowed out of the breach, into a nearby fiord and then to the sea, said Andres Rivera, a glaciologist with Chile’s Center of Scientific Studies.
Rivera, accompanied by an expert from the Chilean Antarctic Institute, flew over the site in a navy airplane, taking hundreds of photographs.
“On one side of the Bernardo glacier one can see a large hole or gap, and we believe that’s where the water flowed through,” Rivera said in a navy communique. “This confirms that glaciers in the region are retreating and getting thinner.”
Wow, they did all of this great scientific work from the backseat of an airplane! Two glacier studying quacks have been able to confirm that the entire climate has changed based on a dry hole in the ground. Amazing brainwork, Holmes.
I did a little research myself. This Bernardo O’Higgins National Park has active volcanoes in it. Now, I don’t have to be a climatologist to know that volcanoes mean earthquakes, shifting ground heat and upwelling of surrounding terrain. Couldn’t an earthquake or something similar caused whatever was clogging this basin to jar loose and drain the water?
A quick Google search reveals that yes, there were some pretty strong earthquakes in that region in May, about the time that they discovered the water had drained. The USGS has a map of the quake here.
And the Lautaro volcano erupts every 30 years or so, the last time being in the 1960′s. Its currently overdue for activity. I’d say that this claim of an empty crater related to global warming is fraudulent given other more plausible explanations.
This Rivera guy has written many alarmist papers on global warming according to his bio here.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Baby Update
Jul 6th
Things are going well at home. The baby’s gaining weight and is beginning to shrug off those full bottles a bit easier, meaning that he likes to stay awake longer. Which might be okay if he wanted to stay awake in the daytime. But three hours overnight is going to drive my wife crazy.
I don’t feel like I’m getting much sleep, but I know I am because I have had some bizarre baby-related dreams. The one dream last night involved my wife and I accidentally leaving the baby somewhere outside of a strip mall. I was panicking, but my wife was assuring me that things would be okay. And somehow the baby was already beginning to talk. He was insisting that we feed him beef stew, and not the type in a can. He wanted homemade. And more shocking than a two-week old talking were his attempts at walking. In fact, as the dream went along, he began to evolve into a real-life Stewie Griffin, and that’s when I awoke.
I may try to post more pictures soon- if I ever catch up on my sleep.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Dinosaur Fossils Devoured by Chinese Hicks
Jul 5th
I thought that under a communist regime, all of the people get a quality education? If so, then why are the Chinese so stupid that they still believe that the giant fossils they dig up and grind into folk medicine cures comes from dragons instead of the valuable dinosaur bones they really are? The answer must be that Communist education is worthless. And why would the people have the need for folk medicine if the Communist medical system was as awesome as it is purported to be?
And again, this is a fine example why some cultures are not as valuable as others. In the west, we value archaeology and paleontology. In China, they eat the bones because they are uneducated and sickly.
From the AP here:
Villagers in central China spent decades digging up bones they believed belonged to flying dragons and using them in traditional medicines. Turns out the bones belonged to dinosaurs, and now scientists are doing the digging.
Until last year, the fossils were being sold in Henan province as “dragon bones” at about 25 cents a pound, scientist Dong Zhiming said Wednesday.The calcium-rich bones were sometimes boiled with other ingredients and fed to children to treat dizziness and leg cramps. Other times they were ground up and turned into a paste applied directly to fractures and other injuries, he said.
When the villagers found out last year the bones were from dinosaurs, they donated 440 pounds for research. Over the last two decades, the villagers had dug up an estimated 1 ton of bones.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Al Gore III Dope Smoking Lead Foot
Jul 5th
Who knew a Prius could go so fast? Albert Gore duh Turd the Third was busted when he was standing on the accelerator of his tiny blue Prius Hybrid on the Interstate outside of San Diego, California. He got that tiny battery-operated car up to triple digits on the speedometer before he was pulled over by an incredulous State Trooper. And since he had lots of dope in the car, it will cost him 20 Grand to get out of jail.
From CBS here:
Al Gore’s son was pulled over for speeding on a California freeway early Wednesday and arrested on suspicion of possessing marijuana and prescription drugs, authorities said.
Al Gore III, 24, was driving a blue Toyota Prius about 100 mph south on the San Diego Freeway when he was pulled over by sheriff’s deputies who said they smelled marijuana, said Sheriff’s Department spokesman Jim Amormino.
The deputies searched the car and found less than an ounce of marijuana along with Xanax, Valium, Vicodin and Adderall, which is used for attention deficit disorder, Amormino said.
“He does not have a prescription for any of those drugs,” Amormino said.
Gore was being held in the men’s central jail in Santa Ana on $20,000 bail.
Al Junior Junior just wants Daddy’s attention? This isn’t the first time that this kid was busted for speeding and drug possession. He was arrested in 2003 for marijuana possession and in 2002 for suspected drunken-driving.
Maybe Daddy should stop trying to save the world from ficticious a crisis and instead focus on getting his kids off of drugs.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Cell Phone Kills Welder
Jul 4th
I used to be a welder, and I collect stories about how welders do stupid things to get themselves killed. I know, its macabe, weird, probably unnecessary, and almost universally detested by the welding community. I get loads of hate mail from welders because I think only an idiot would continue to do that job given the risks of fiery death.
And every once in a while, I come across a story so bizarre that it belongs here. In this instance, a welder had his Motorola Cell Phone in his front pocket while he was welding. The heat and sparks caused it to explode, taking hunks out of his chest and killing him.
From the Reg here:
Motorola and Chinese authorities are working together to discover just how an exploding mobile phone battery claimed the life of a welder at Yingpan Iron Ore Dressing Plant in Gansu’s Jinta county.
According to state news agency Xinhua, Xiao Jinpeng died on 19 June after “a Motorola cell phone in [his] chest pocket suddenly exploded” and emergency treatment at a local hospital failed. The victim suffered broken ribs, fragments of which pierced his heart.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Death to the Little Lime Dude
Jul 3rd
A hilarious war is going on in Bethesda, MD, a neighborhood full of rich liberal suburbanites. Despite the fact that the speed limit is obeyed and there have been no injuries, some families are putting little green plastic patrolmen out on the streets to try to get people to go as slowly as possible- less than 10 MPH so no one runs over their precious children.
Sensible people, miffed at being preached to about their speed, have taken to destroying the annoying plastic props. Is it a hate crime if you burn a little plastic man?
From Gazette.net here:
Violent attacks and kidnappings have shaken up a quiet Bethesda neighborhood tucked just a few tree-lined streets away from River Road.
The victims are child-sized green and yellow plastic figures resembling gingerbread men, with the word ‘‘SLOW” plastered across their midsections. In English Village and Landon Village, where dozens of children play and walk to the bus stop, parents have posted the so-called ‘‘little lime dudes” on their front lawns, to encourage speeding drivers to slow down.
But something sinister is at work, as the little men are being stolen and maimed — even in broad daylight. The Doueks bought their first ‘‘little lime dude,” three months ago. It was promptly stolen.
The family persevered, heading back to Strosniders Hardware Store to buy another LLD. The second little man’s fate was much more gruesome. Before the sun rose on his third day in the Doueks’ front yard, the lime dude’s flag had been stolen. So father Danny Douek fashioned a new one out of a plastic dowel. He slathered the little lime dude with Vaseline and filled him with 18 pounds of cement. But late one night, someone drove a car onto the Douek’s lawn, leaving skid marks on the road, Beth Douek said. The car slammed into the lime dude and dragged him down the road.
‘‘Someone came with a saw and beheaded him,” Douek said.
Parents in these unincorporated Bethesda communities began posting the plastic figures in an effort to calm speeding, as one of many initiatives. In the morning they wait at the school bus stop with their children and distribute fliers with warnings like, ‘‘You can kill a child at 10 miles per hour.” Other Bethesda residents waited at stop signs and handed drivers cookies as a thank you for stopping.
I hate those little annoying plastic guys too. My brother’s stuck-up neighbor used to put one out in front of their mansion and even took to yelling at me if I didn’t obey their miniature speed limit zone. So I took to yelling back to explain that roads were for cars and to keep her brats in the house or the yard. Thankfully they moved.
To those neighbors in Bethesda who are annoyed with the self-righteous safety patrol moms- Start passing out flyers showing how to keep kids in the yard. And get your own little lime dude and change the warning on it to “stay out of the road!” and put it in those neighbors’ yards. If they still don’t get the picture, try fresh honey on their doorsteps. The Moms will be too busy washing sticky footprints off the floors and carpets to keep out the ants to pass out any more flyers.
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(1 votes, average: 6.00 out of 6) Loading ...Reason 265 to Homeschool- No Fat Chicks
Jul 3rd
Newest Reason for Homeschooling? Your children won’t be raped by the fattest, newest teachers.
Okay- for kids that have sex with their teachers, it is understood that there will be psychological repercussions for many years to come. But do shrinks charge for overtime if the teacher looked like this?
Chris Farley in Drag? And of course, black is so slimming.
Thanks to Fark, I found this article at LJWorld here:
A former Lawrence High School teacher pleaded guilty Monday to one count of aggravated indecent liberties with a student in Douglas County District Court.
Meredith Kane, 24, who was in her first year of teaching at LHS, was arrested March 16 for having sexual relations with the 15-year-old boy.
Prosecutors said the acts occurred between August and mid-March. “During that time period, I did have sexual intercourse (with the victim) in Douglas County,” Kane told Judge Stephen Six.
Another count of aggravated indecent liberties and two counts of criminal sodomy were dismissed.
Kane could face 55 to 247 months in prison.
Meredith Kane started right in on her predation on children. Was the kid covered in Hot Pockets? Twinkies? Big Macs? What else could have caused this woman to molest a child nine years her junior?
You know, this fat bitch just got out of college, where I assume she studied really hard to be a teacher. I think the teacher college text books should have a whole chapter to not having sex with their students.
Make no mistake. Children are more at risk of sexual predation from their school teachers than have ever been at risk by the priesthood.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Whacko Jacko Coming to the Old Dominion
Jul 3rd
Umm… Okay, I guess. The article doesnt say where in Virginia the mightly gloved one is going to- some think that the VA Beach area would be okay. Others are banking on the rolling hills of Northern Virginia. Hey isn’t Mike Vick’s dog-fighting house in Surry still vacant?
Click the Photo to Here Mike Belch!
From Fox News here:
Michael Jackson is moving to … Los Angeles? Europe? The moon?
None of the above. Jackson is evidently on his way to a rental in Virginia. Yes, Virginia, there is a Jacko.
Why the colony most famous for George Washington and Busch Gardens? Some have speculated that Virginia Beach has been the locale of many recording studios, including those of Teddy Riley and Timbaland.
But Virginia has an added advantage: It keeps Jackson 3,000 miles away from his concerned family.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Eco-Religion’s Glorious Post-Apocalypse
Jul 3rd
I have written several times before how eco-religion, or the worship of the environment is based upon Judeo-Christian beliefs- Their Eden story is that the world was once at peace without people on the planet. The original sin was mankind using natural resources for himself and sinning is the equivalent of burning fossil fuels and consuming non-renewable resources. Prophets of the environment come and go- such as Rachel Carson and now Al Gore. Judgement day is the belief that humans will destroy their own environment and become extinct.
And the post-apocalypse is a return to the Eden-like ways where man is extinct or at one with the environment.
Today, “Human Greed” is blamed for us using more than our fair share of sunlight. From Sydney Morning Herald here:
HUMANS are just one of the millions of species on Earth, but we use up almost a quarter of the sun’s energy captured by plants – the most of any species.
The human dominance of this natural resource is affecting other species, reducing the amount of energy available to them by almost 10 per cent, scientists report.
Researchers said the findings showed humans were using “a remarkable share” of the earth’s plant productivity “to meet the needs and wants of one species”.
They also warned that the increased use of biofuels – such as ethanol and canola – should be viewed cautiously, given the potential for further pressure on ecosystems.
“Here we are, just one species on the earth, and we’re grabbing a quarter of the renewable resources … we’re probably being a bit greedy.”
The liberal idea that humans are no more deserving of sunlight than other animals is the ultimate in moral equivalency. A bug is a rabbit is a wolf is a horse is a human. And if we use more energy than chipmunks, we are greedy and sinful.
I am still waiting for the vast hordes of eco-worshippers to take their own lives to lessen their burden on this planet. Only by their noble martyrdom could us eco-sinners see the light.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Porno Pizza, Delivered Hot!
Jul 2nd
One of the jobs I held before I got into computers was running a Pizzeria. I was pretty good at it, and amazingly, I never got sick of eating free pizza for lunch and dinner. I think of all the jobs I’ve ever had, I still look back on that one with the most fondness. Driving around on summer nights delivering pies and listening to the stereo were nothing but good times.
Now there is a new twist on an old gimmick- inserted beneath eight slices of pepperoni is now a picture of hot porn!
From Canoe News here:
It doesn’t matter what you put on your pizza at this delivery joint, it’s still hotter than the average slice. Local entrepreneur Corey Wildeman has launched Porno Pizza, a delivery-only pizza business that places pornography where you would usually find only cardboard — under the pizza.
The idea for the business came to Wildeman, 30, while working at other pizza places. “I’m absolutely thrilled with how successful it’s been,” he said while on a delivery last night.
Although customers can’t pick which saucy image they will receive, the owner would like to offer more specific choices in the future.
“It runs the full gamut. There are some that are very Playboy-esque and others which Larry Flynt would blush at,” he said, describing the photos sent out with orders.
“It’s about 75 to 80% female that are placing the orders and are taking orders at the door,” he said.
So chicks like porn with their pizza? Who knew?
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Dan May’s Amazing Art
Jul 2nd
Dan May is one of those artists that refuses to let his ideas rattle around in his skull for very long. He puts his amazing imagination onto canvas and his ideas take the shapes of mournful organic thingamabobs and pensive fanged jeebers. His skill allows him to use acrylics in a way that it seems like pastels-
Click here to see one of my favorites, a monster painted onto a used Bingo Card.
Click here to see the rest of Dan’s Galleries and blogs.
Thanks to Ectomo.com for the pointer to this collection!
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ....HK Spammers Love You and Me
Jul 2nd
There is so much malware spam coming from the .hk namespace that it bears noting. It seems that there is a spate of malware-laced fake ecard mails that are likely related to the PeaComm botnet.
The emails say they are from a relative, friend, admirer, or my favorite, a “worshipper” and the url is typically a .hk domain followed by a unique string. I have not bothered to click on them to see what they try to do. But according to ArborNetworks, its rather nasty.
The exploit website tries to throw every exploit at you, including the kitchen sink. There are animated cursor attacks, quicktime overflows, winzip overflows, webfolderview attacks, and even a link to download an executable to infect yourself manually if the javascript fails to do it for you.
The purpose of this agressive email spam campaign is to take on rival spammer botnets. From ArborNetworks here:
So, at this point, Peacomm and its gang are upping the ante. They’re improving their methods to infect your computer, they’re gaining ground, and they’re not slowing down. This has been going on for a couple of weeks at this point. Also, there are rumors that Peacomm is launching (at present) a DDoS attack against rival spam gangs, so your infected computer may also be a DDoS bot. Peacomm infected boxes have participated in DDoS events before against rivals and anti-spam efforts.
And just today I noticed that the Peacomm spam emails have morphed once again. Now they are spoofed from BlueMountain, a known ecard site. This may help fool those that haven’t fallen for the spam yet. If they start showing up looking like evite invitations, even I will get netted into this one.
So update your computers if you havent done so already. Upgrade your helper applications too- Winzip, acrobat reader, quicktime, java, media player, and your chat applications. Also, one tip you don’t hear about much- uninstall your old versions of Java. When java upgrades, it leaves the old version intact and running. Some spyware and malware knows to call the old vulnerable versions to infect you, and it will work, so remove it.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Wrong Way to Start Your Cruise
Jul 2nd
A man from my region exhibited pure stupidity by leaping off the deck of his cruiseliner when it was 50 miles out to sea. Somehow, he managed not to get sucked into the giant screws of the ship and was picked up by the Cast Guard a bit later, reeking of gin.
From the AP here:
A Maryland man was rescued early Monday from the ocean off Florida after he reportedly jumped from a cruise ship, the Coast Guard said.
The Carnival Liberty alerted the Coast Guard around 11:35 p.m. Sunday that Scott Durrin, 29, of Rockville, Md., had possibly jumped overboard, according to the Coast Guard. Durrin appeared to have been intoxicated.Durrin fell about 36 feet into the water about 50 miles off the coast of Boca Raton. Crew aboard the Liberty threw life-rings and jackets over the side. Coast Guard crews located Durrin about an hour later.
A 36 foot drop would have made the jumping point at the lifeboat deck, where the red line is on the ship. The story is not clear on whether or not the ship stopped to help in the search. And Durrin is lucky that the water 50 miles off the coast of Florida is a nice 76 degrees at this time of year too.
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(No Ratings Yet. Rate It!) Loading ...Those Lying Babies!
Jul 1st
Drudge provided a link to an article that says that babies begin telling lies at the age of 6 months. What could a six month old possibly lie about?
From the Telegraph here:
Whether lying about raiding the biscuit tin or denying they broke a toy, all children try to mislead their parents at some time. Yet it now appears that babies learn to deceive from a far younger age than anyone previously suspected.
Behavioural experts have found that infants begin to lie from as young as six months. Simple fibs help to train them for more complex deceptions in later life.
Infants quickly learnt that using tactics such as fake crying and pretend laughing could win them attention. By eight months, more difficult deceptions became apparent, such as concealing forbidden activities or trying to distract parents’ attention.
I came up with my own list of common lies told by infants. They are:
- That’s not my poopy diaper. The dog did it.
- Peek-a-Boo is the worst game ever!
- I want a tatoo that says “Enfamil 4-Evah”
- I don’t have to drool. I just like a slimy chin.
- I don’t like riding in the car. I’m just computing your gas mileage.
- I don’t need to eat at 3 AM. I just like the funny way your hair looks.
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