John Edwards expressed disappointment today in a recent dip in the polls due to an announcement that his wife’s bone cancer is likely controllable by drugs.  So the Presidential hopeful intends to call a press conference next week to announce the abnormal results of his wife’s most recent pap smear.

“Sure, its just one or two cells, but cervical cancer can be a killer too,” said an anonymous campaign worker and expert on popular carcinomas.  “Besides, now that we have gotten the word out on getting mammograms, its time to focus on other women’s medical exams like the pap smear.”

Asked if the abnormal results could be indicative of a genital wart infection, or HPV, the campaign worker was quick to deny the charge.  “Certainly HPV causes cervical cancer, but Mrs. Edwards does not have HPV or any other sexually transmitted diseases.  But its important for young women to become vaccinated for HPV.”

Thanks to SixMeatBuffet for the idea.

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