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June 4, 2009

How to Build an Exploding Drink

by pat — Categories: Enablers — Tags: , Leave a comment

Thanks to Wired Magazine and Neatorama.

1. Shop
Buy the ingredients at your corner store: 2 liters of Diet Coke (warm, diet only because it isn’t sticky), one pack Mentos candy (mint), and some rye whiskey (cheap)… Manhattans also call for a splash of sweet vermouth and 2 small dashes Angostura bitters

2. Prep
Fill an ice tray so that each section is half full of water and stick it in the icebox. Once all of the half-ice cubes have frozen, fill them up to the top placing one candy into each cube. Freeze again.

3. Mix
Combine four cubes and 8 oz. of Diet Coke. Top with 2 oz. of whiskey. The Vermouth and bitters are optional but necessary for an authentic taste. Of course, Manhattans don’t actually ever make use of cola or soda so authenticity has already been sacrificed to the prank. Garnish with a naive smile and serve. Wait five minutes.

4. Flee
When the ice melts enough to expose the dense candy’s gum arabic to the cola, it’ll erupt like a fifth-grade science project.

May 19, 2009

Finally, The Best Liquor Evah!

by pat — Categories: Best of the Best, Celebrity Belches, Enablers, Fan Mail — Tags: , 1 Comment

Bacon flavored Vodka. Is this the next best drink? If Muslims were vampires, would this be their holy water?

Check out some of the recipes-  The bacon-flavored bloody mary looks awesome:

Bakon Mary

  • 1 oz. to 1½ oz. Bakon Vodka in a Highball glass filled with ice.
  • Fill glass with tomato juice
  • 1 dash celery salt
  • 1 dash ground black pepper
  • 1 dash Tabasco
  • 2-4 dashes of Worcestershire sauce
  • 1/8 tsp. horseradish (pure, never creamed)
  • Dash of lemon or lime juice

Garnish with a celery stalk; a skewer of olives, pickles, carrots, mushrooms, or other vegetables; or even meat or shrimp (bacon, salami, shrimp, etc.) and cheese. Pickled asparagus spears or pickled beans are also great as a garnish.

Thanks to SoGood for the link!

May 17, 2009

Stop Drinking My Beer

by pat — Categories: Enablers — Tags: Leave a comment

Ever been at a party and you catch someone drinking out of your glass? This is one solution to this problem. Glasses with chalkboard paint on them so people can label their glasses! Available at World Market.

May 11, 2009

Burger King “Kingon” Delivers Warp 5 Wedgie

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To promote the Star Trek Burger King glasses, Burger King has transformed its King character to a Klingon who dishes out horrible wedgies to Star Fleet cadets in order to steal their Burger King glasses. Check it out!

April 30, 2009

Quiznos Commercial Starring Jim Parsons aka “Sheldon” from Big Bang Theory

by pat — Categories: Enablers — Tags: Leave a comment

Check out my blog post on my daily blog here for a post about BBT. But since Jim Parsons is eating a yummy sub, it belongs here.

April 29, 2009

50 States, 50 Best Burgers

by pat — Categories: Enablers — Tags: 1 Comment

The FoodNetwork and Bobby Flay have produced the ultimate guide to burgers in the United States. You can check it out here. I happen to live close by to the one in my State and I can’t wait to try it.

April 23, 2009

McDonald’s Food Induces Auditory Hallucinations

by pat — Categories: Enablers — Tags: Leave a comment

Specifically earworms. Catchiest song ever sung by a stuffed, wall-mounted fish. Enjoy.

April 23, 2009

Belching Burrito Babe

by pat — Categories: Belches, Female BelchesLeave a comment

I think this chick takes her shirt off to eat burritos because she is just messy. And I’m not sure why she is swaying her hips either- maybe it helps her push the gas out. Enjoy.

April 20, 2009

Healthy Choice Hilarity

by pat — Categories: Enablers — Tags: Leave a comment

Julia Louis Dreyfus’ latest Healthy Choice commercial where she stuffs her face is television advertising gold. I can’t believe she didn’t choke.

April 7, 2009

Square Butts Burger King Commercial

by pat — Categories: Enablers — Tags: Leave a comment

This is the awesome new commercial featuring Sir Mix-a-Lot and the King singing and dancing to celebrate the perfect squareness of Sponge Bob SquarePants’ square ass. Enjoy.

March 31, 2009

Mountain Oysters

by pat — Categories: Enablers — Tags: Leave a comment

Deep Fried lumps of yummy hang-lows.

There is a similar testicle festival going on right now in Oakdale California. Check out this horribly cliche’d article from the AP:

The fundraising idea may seem a little nuts, but Oakdale’s annual Testicle Festival is always a big hit. On Monday, volunteers with the town’s Rotary Club plan to fry up 400 pounds of the private parts of bulls and serve them to diners who pay $50 apiece for the sit-down meal.

The event, whose proceeds also benefit the Oakland Cowboy Museum, has drawn an average of 450 people and last year raised $28,000.

It’s common practice on cattle ranches for young male bovines to be castrated into steers, which after the initial loss, eventually makes them more docile and easier to handle. Fans of the delicacy, also referred to as “mountain oysters,” come from around the state.

According to Rotarians, everyone who buys a ticket is guaranteed to “have a ball.”

March 27, 2009

KFC Wants to Fill PotHoles

by pat — Categories: Enablers — Tags: Leave a comment

Got potholes in your town? Let KFC fill them in!

From the Trib here:

KFC has sent off a letter to the nation’s mayors, offering to patch their potholes for free. Well, the company will leave behind a stenciled brand on the patch informing people the road has been “Re-Freshed by KFC.”

“In honor of our “Fresh Tastes Best” campaign, we want to come and Re-”Fresh” your roads!” KFC president Roger Eaton says in the letter. “Every patched pothole comes with the Colonel’s very own stamp of approval.”

March 16, 2009

Half Black Presidents Love Fried Chicken

by pat — Categories: Enablers — Tags: Leave a comment

At least, that is what this German company thought.  They even serve the Obama Fingers with a side of curry sauce.

The story behind these tasty vittles is here.

March 14, 2009

How to Belch Like a Girl

by pat — Categories: Belches, Female BelchesLeave a comment

Or at least like a girl who really knows how to belt one out. This is “FruitLooper.” Enjoy her instructive video below.

February 21, 2009

Bacon-Wrapped Meatloaf With Mac-n-Cheese Injection

by pat — Categories: Belch.Com, Enablers — Tags: 1 Comment

My wife makes a great bacon-wrapped meat loaf, and whenever she does, we make a big event of it and invite her whole family over to enjoy it. Maybe we can figure out how to get the mac and cheese into it, but I think I prefer mine on the side.  Why mess with perfection?

Thanks to ThisIsWhyYoureFat for the recipe idea.

February 21, 2009

Bacon Cheese Pizza Burger Will Be Godzilla. My Tummy Will Be Tokyo

by pat — Categories: Enablers1 Comment

I want to eat this. Right now. Instead of a birthday cake, I want one of these things.

Giant stacks of beef fried and coated with jack and colby cheeses, layered with bacon and eggs and sandwiched between two Meat Pizzas.
I think it could use some pickles. Thanks to Geeks Are Sexy for the tasty snack!

February 1, 2009

Coon. It’s What’s for Dinner.

by pat — Categories: Enablers — Tags: Leave a comment

Now this is what I call organic cooking.

A story in the Sun Journal here talks about what great food raccoon meat is and that a single animal will feed a family of four.

He rolls into the parking lot of Leon’s Thriftway in an old maroon Impala with a trunk full of frozen meat.

Raccoon – the other dark meat.

In five minutes, Montrose, Mo., trapper Larry Brownsberger is sold out in the lot at 39th Street and Kensington Avenue. Word has gotten around about how clean his frozen coon carcasses are. How nicely they’re tucked up in their brown butcher paper. How they almost look like a trussed turkey … or something.

His loyal customers beam as they leave, thinking about the meal they’ll soon be eating. That is, as soon as the meat is thawed. Then brined. Soaked overnight. Parboiled for two hours. Slow-roasted or smoked or barbecued to perfection.

Raccoon, which made the first edition of “The Joy of Cooking” in 1931, is labor-intensive but well worth the time, aficionados say.

Raccoons go for $3 to $7 – each, not per pound – and will feed about five adults. Four, if they’re really hungry. Those who dine on coon meat sound the same refrain: It’s good eatin’.

February 1, 2009

Superbowl Snack Stadium, Complete With Bacon Walls

by pat — Categories: Enablers — Tags: , Leave a comment

Thanks to Threedonia, here is a miniature stadium built entirely from junk food. It has twinkies, chips, guacomole, salsa, nacho dip and much more, including a Bacon retaining wall to keep the snacks from tumbling onto the field.

You can read all about it at HolyTaco.  My favorite part:

STEP 7 – The Bacon Wall
The bacon wall is the most important part of the stadium, because it keeps the throngs of screaming fans, in this case chips, from falling on the field, in this case the guacamole and salsa.  Insert tooth picks into the first row of twinkies, and then weave the bacon in and out of them, so that it forms a pliable wall.
And here I thought I was being fancy making stuff on toast.

January 22, 2009

Chester Cheetah is a Bad Influence

by pat — Categories: Enablers — Tags: , Leave a comment

That orange cheesy goodness just gets everywhere. But I blame Chester. He makes you do it.

January 9, 2009

Burger King’s Angry Whopper: Whip That Onion

by pat — Categories: Enablers — Tags: 1 Comment

It cracks me up to imagine anyone growing a plant for the expressed purpose of abusing it with a bullwhip. And if you think what he does to his onions is bad, you should see him assault his radishes.

Burger King , OnionThe most popular videos are here

I actually don’t like spicy hamburgers. I know Wendy’s has been making them for years now, and it is just not appealing to me. Anyone out there that likes this new burger, please leave a comment and tell us why.

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